Jlovestruckx0 Posted November 29, 2011 Posted November 29, 2011 I have been with my boyfriend for 2 and a 1/2 years now. We have broken up twice before, the first time I was pathetic I admit, begged for him back, cried, and he at first ignored me. I eventually gave up after almost a month, and spent the second month ignoring him, letting go. As soon as he saw me let go, he of course wanted me back, missed me etc... I took him back... The next breakup I skipped all the pathetic begging, and just accepted it, I cried of course but I never let him see it. I acted perfectly happy around him and he would constantly tell me he missed me, but still wanted to be apart. I sent him a final text saying I needed my space for a while to clear my head and that I wanted him to leave me alone for some time, he replied with i loved you through everything, even the arguments, i just needed time, i cant ask you to wait etc... I unfortunately needed a huge favor from him the next day and he picked me up.. He cried for me back, begged, and all, told me he would never act the same towards me and everything. I honestly thought that him crying was a HUGE sign that he really missed me.. Hes the kind of person who absolutely never shows emotion, its like he rejects it. He deals with everything silently and alone, hes weird, but i got used to it. Anyway we got back together and we've had good weeks and bad weeks. Just recently we went from an amazing week talking about us together for the long run, to arguing all last week. He was talking down to me, telling me to not piss him off when I asked him simple questions, telling me to shutup, telling me he doesnt care about me being upset. I finally sat him down to talk and he said he doesnt care about the relationship as much as he should. He knows i dont deserve it but he doesnt exactly know why he feels this way, he just does, he said he knows he should feel bad about what he says to me, but he doesnt all the time, because he doesnt feel sorry some times. I cried because I knew a breakup was coming along, I asked if theres was anything we could fix, told him i loved him , and he suggested that we hang out less, since we normally hang out everyday, all day if possible... so we decided to try that out until the end of this year, and if we continued arguing and he still felt the same then we would end it unfortunately. I dont understand, when were not together he is miserable from what I have seen and from what he admits to me, and Im miserable also... but when I am here for him and were together he takes the situation for granted, doesnt give me special attention, i just feel like I care so much more than he does and I know thats the case. Now I'm asking myself what to do. I know the right thing to do is to just leave him alone, move on, break up with him, because honestly I have put up with so much of him, and so much that I dont deserve, and I feel like this relationship has been nothing but me trying and putting effort in for both of us... but I cant get myself to do it and i have no idea why. I love him, I want to be with him, I can see it working, but he needs to change some things... We have gotten better, but he still feels like were always together.. so how much space should a person really need from their bf/gf? I like space from him , but i dont need to be away from him to appreciate his company... I just want him to want to be with me and to care as much as I do... How do you know if you should let go, and how do you let go? Please anyone's input would help, I'm tired of being upset and feeling this way, its horrible being apart from him, but its pretty bad being with someone and feeling like your not important.... Any advice?
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