creighton0123 Posted November 29, 2011 Posted November 29, 2011 14 hours until long distance relationship is just a relationship. I'll be around, but for the most part I bid you all a very fond farewell. Although my long distance relationship, 13 months altogether, is shorter than some of you on here, I can leave you with the following advice: 1. You don't need to pick battles. Patience is the key to any long distance relationship. Any problem that arises can be calmly discussed without accusing one another of deficiencies in the relationship. My SO and I managed 13 months apart without one fight. It may be our personalities are more calm, but we managed to resolve any problems that occurred both calmly and openly. 2. Communication (for us) was essential. We managed to talk to one another, even if only for a minute or two, at least once a day. This communication was never over email or instant messenger. It was always voice and video. I found that despite timezone differences, a few minutes a day to catch up was very easy to arrange. It was our agreement early on that I would always call him and he would be there to answer - or call back when he is available despite the time of night. It made the moments when he called me more special. 3. Sex is possible in an LDR. Just get naked and have fun. Skype makes it much easier ;-) 4. A visit at least every four months is ideal, but not required. 5. Discussing the status of your relationship every few weeks is important. What do you like about the relationship? What - aside from the distance - don't you like? What do you want more of? What could you do with less of? Is anything bothering you and what solution would you propose? Lastly, always ask whether or not you and your partner wish to continue the long distance relationship. A mutual "yes" goes a long way in ensuring your enduring bond. 6. If at all possible, avoid IM or text based communication. It's impersonal and is no substitute for voice/video communication. 7. Jealousy does not need to rear its ugly head. Trust your partner until he or she gives you a reason not to be trusted. Have a talk early on in the relationship so that instead of assuming monogamy or assuming an open relationship, it is out there and you both verbally agree that you want one or the other. 8. Know when to call it quits. Like any romantic relationship, long distance relationships can go south, particularly after the honeymoon phase and the novelty of it all is faded. If most of your time spent communicating is spent arguing and there's no end in sight, it might be best to part ways having learned invaluable lessons in life and love. 9. Don't bottle things up inside. If you have something negative or positive to share, it is best that you share it. In person is better, but video/voice is a good substitute. Text is a land mine. Foster honesty and the path your relationship is taking will always be clear. and 10. Have fun. Don't let the distance prevent you from sharing funny stories, playing online games together, cooking the same meals together, reading the same books, watching the same shows or movies, listening to the same music. There are plenty of ways for you to do the same things while apart. Always try to think of new ideas and avoid monotony. I wish you all the best of luck. Know that an LDR is possible. In fact, know that you and your partner can come out the other side of an LDR a stronger and more secure couple. Regards, Creighton
Citizen Erased Posted November 29, 2011 Posted November 29, 2011 Great post! And congrats, you made it!!
folieadeux Posted November 30, 2011 Posted November 30, 2011 All great advice. Congrats for making it through and coming out stronger on the other side. It's been a pleasure getting to know you and I wish you both nothing but the very best!
TMichaels Posted November 30, 2011 Posted November 30, 2011 creighton, By now, your 14 hours must be history. Congrats to you and your significant other for making it through! Hope your reunion and relationship will continue to flourish. Be sure to stop by and let us know... Best, TMichaels
LittleTiger Posted November 30, 2011 Posted November 30, 2011 Great post Creighton! Enjoy your new 'relationship' and keep us posted.
Els Posted November 30, 2011 Posted November 30, 2011 Creighton, I'm so excited for you!!!! :bunny::bunny: Keep us updated, okay?
Author creighton0123 Posted November 30, 2011 Author Posted November 30, 2011 Thanks, everyone. Everything is great today. He got in last night, had dinner with him and his parents, then back to my place. Right now, things are back to normal. He's not here at this moment, but will stop by later tonight. It's good to be back into our groove and good to know that instead of 14 hours and $1200 away, he's just around the corner :-)
folieadeux Posted December 1, 2011 Posted December 1, 2011 Glad he got in safe and do keep us updated from time to time
sweetjasmine Posted December 1, 2011 Posted December 1, 2011 Yay! Congratulations! Always glad to see another couple make it and end up stronger in the end.
Whipple Posted December 1, 2011 Posted December 1, 2011 Congratulations! It's always refreshing to read about a happy ending to a LDR.
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