lana_sa Posted November 28, 2011 Posted November 28, 2011 I have emailed with my ex for the past 2-3 weeks.it was all light and casual,he did mention the past a few times.He was the one that broke up btw.So today he asked me if i am seeing someone or if i am single. I don't know if i should answer(its no),or if i should just ignore that part of his mail,any suggestions? and what do you think it means? i mean the fact he asked this..does it mean anything
twinkles Posted November 28, 2011 Posted November 28, 2011 just tell him...I didn't get married today if that's what you mean. never let him know that there is noone in your life.. let him work to get back into your life if that's what you want.
smokey bear Posted November 28, 2011 Posted November 28, 2011 mmmm interesting, I would just be honest and not play games, that way you can't go wrong.
twinkles Posted November 28, 2011 Posted November 28, 2011 It's no game Smokey. It would just be an ego boost for him knowing that she is sitting there boohooing over him. It's just a playful comment not a lie....besides it's really none of his business.
Author lana_sa Posted November 28, 2011 Author Posted November 28, 2011 It's no game Smokey. It would just be an ego boost for him knowing that she is sitting there boohooing over him. It's just a playful comment not a lie....besides it's really none of his business. I agree here,,,but i cant really say its non of your bussines..it sounds a bit too harsh.Any ideas how i can say it more nice and make him even more interested?
lolita jade Posted November 28, 2011 Posted November 28, 2011 By him asking means he gives a sh** Dont answer or do what twinkles suggests. You have to be one step ahead of him. Breaking up is a game whether we like it or not...... a game of keeping your pride and staying on top of the situation as long as you dont play bad games.
twinkles Posted November 28, 2011 Posted November 28, 2011 Lana see my above statement. It doesn't directly answer the question yet remains light. Keep him guessing and intrigued. A yes or no answers the question.
Author lana_sa Posted November 28, 2011 Author Posted November 28, 2011 okey and btw i shouldn't ask the same back? i don't really wanna know either
twinkles Posted November 28, 2011 Posted November 28, 2011 No, don't ask him anything...By not asking it sends the message that you don't care. Even if you do he doesn't need to know that. Let him offer the information.
M2155 Posted November 28, 2011 Posted November 28, 2011 I like Twinkle's suggestion. My standard is "there's no ring on my finger."
smokey bear Posted November 29, 2011 Posted November 29, 2011 Play games if you want. If i was the dumper and recieved a response that indicated you were seeing others, i wouldnt proceed.
smokey bear Posted November 29, 2011 Posted November 29, 2011 A successful recon is a new relationship. So if he was a stranger asking you if you were single, what would you reply? You wouldnt give a stranger, new love interest the impression you were seeing others.
M2155 Posted November 29, 2011 Posted November 29, 2011 I wouldn't go straight stating I am single if a met a stranger I liked. I'd probably say something coy like "it depends." I don't think the suggestion is game-playing or being sarcastic as much as it's flirty. I guess it depends on how you say it. No harm and telling him. But I can say I saw an ex of mine recently and evading the question seemed to keep him more intriqued.
betterdeal Posted November 29, 2011 Posted November 29, 2011 It means he's interested (of course he's interested - he has eyes and you're you), but he dumped you, so tough luck, sunshine, dumping is a one way street.
Author lana_sa Posted November 29, 2011 Author Posted November 29, 2011 I ignored his question and judging by his answer he is kinda sore for that,im not answering.I just made a joke and passed that question,And he said "i am just asking because you know i have no goals"
twinkles Posted November 29, 2011 Posted November 29, 2011 Lana that's just a defensive answer. No goal no score right? If the question wasn't important he would not have had a reaction to it. Keep it up.
Author lana_sa Posted November 29, 2011 Author Posted November 29, 2011 I don´t know it kinda made me sad reading he has "no goals"..why care then? anyway i continued ignoring and this is what i got (the mails are long i post here only the parts about this) he:i can see you did not change,you still always change topic when you do not like the question me:i can see you never changed either,still very curious guy no reply yet
twinkles Posted November 29, 2011 Posted November 29, 2011 You rattled his cage...good comeback. Wait twice as long before you reply back to him as a matter of fact even longer. You have better things to do than wait for his replies.
lolita jade Posted November 29, 2011 Posted November 29, 2011 Enjoy the game playing and stay ahead of his game. Play hard to get but remember no cruel games or it will turn sour.
radiodarcy Posted November 29, 2011 Posted November 29, 2011 I ignored his question and judging by his answer he is kinda sore for that,im not answering.I just made a joke and passed that question,And he said "i am just asking because you know i have no goals" oh for pity's sake! what a baby. i wouldn't even bother to engage him anymore. but that's just me. his response reminds me of my ex: talks in riddles; all the while having no idea what he wants or what he's looking for; yet he expects someone else to help him figure it out.
Author lana_sa Posted November 29, 2011 Author Posted November 29, 2011 oh for pity's sake! what a baby. i wouldn't even bother to engage him anymore. but that's just me. his response reminds me of my ex: talks in riddles; all the while having no idea what he wants or what he's looking for; yet he expects someone else to help him figure it out. he told me before when we were together that he was insecure when it comes to girls...maybe that's why he acts like a total baby now? he wasn't like this before . I wont tell him if he continues asking i am gonna say ...its private, none of your business
Author lana_sa Posted November 29, 2011 Author Posted November 29, 2011 Ok so this is his answer: "ok you dont need to tell me,i wont ask you again,it doesnt matter....even if you have a boyfriend i am not jealous hahha" what the :S
radiodarcy Posted November 29, 2011 Posted November 29, 2011 ahh! yeah - - i would just leave it and not tell him either way. if there was a reason behind his questioning, he would have told you. instead, he's simply fishing. i wouldn't play into it.
Ajax Posted November 29, 2011 Posted November 29, 2011 OP, why is this even an issue? Do you want him back? And if so, why do you want to be with someone who broke up with you? How do you know he won't do it again? If you don't want him back, then what are your motives for talking to him? Why do you care if he thinks you're with someone or not? By playing this game of "maybe I'm with someone, maybe I'm not," you're not being honest with him, and if you can't be honest with someone you shouldn't be in a relationship with them in the first place. I think the mature thing to do is to let him go and stop trying to manipulate the situation.
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