lp1987 Posted November 28, 2011 Posted November 28, 2011 Hello, I am still so shocked, lost, & heartbroken. I got married on October 22nd, 2011 to a man that I have been dating for 6 years. We were high school sweethearts and had been through so much together. From what I could tell, I thought we were happy and in love with each other. A week before the wedding, he started hanging out with friends a lot and getting drunk a lot. I thought it was just wedding jitters but it got to the point where he was talking to me horrible and wanted nothing to do with the wedding planning. I talked to him the day before the wedding and the day of to make sure this was what he wanted. He told me he wanted to get married. Once, a couple of days before the wedding I threatened to cancel the wedding because of the way he had been acting. He said that we were going to get married and thats what he wanted. Wedding day came and it was a good day... we had a lot of fun and I thought we were happy and the "jitters" were gone. On our wedding night, things were perfect. He told me how much he loved me and blah blah blah. We went on a mini honeymoon that only lasted a day and a half because he works out of town for 3 weeks at a time and is home for 3 weeks. He left the Tuesday night after our wedding. While he was gone to work, he didn't ever let on that anything was wrong... we talked about renting a house because there was nothing on the market at the time that we wanted to buy. He would tell me how much he hated his job and how much he missed me. He came home last week and everything changed. He told me that he shouldn't have gotten married and that he wasn't ready. He told me he wasn't ready to move out of his parents house and that he wasn't happy. He said that he loved me but just wasn't happy. I am so lost and heartbroken. He told me that he had needed a few days to think so I gave him several days and after not hearing from him for 4 days, I called him on Saturday and he told me we were done and that he was going to file for divorce. I have no idea what went wrong... I am just beside myself. I cannot sleep past 4 or 5 in the morning. I wake up crying. I have horrible dreams about him. I am just beyond heartbroken. I came to this site because I know many people are going through heartbreak and I was hoping maybe someone can give me a little insight on how to cope. I am having a really hard time accepting the reality that I will never have everything we planned on having together... and letting go of the past 6 years. Any advice would be kindly appreciated.
Ariadne Posted November 29, 2011 Posted November 29, 2011 Oh, no! I'm so sorry lp1987!!! It seems like he got really scared. It's a lot of responsibility. I really hope you guys get to talk and that he doesn't file for divorce. Wishing you the best of luck! Hope things get better. Hugs. {{{lp1987}}}
reboot Posted November 29, 2011 Posted November 29, 2011 You had tons of red flags before the wedding. Why did you ignore them? Did you just want to be married that badly?
Author lp1987 Posted November 30, 2011 Author Posted November 30, 2011 The only red flags were ONE WEEK before the wedding. We were together for 6 years! We were happy or so I thought. I did want to be married, yes... because I loved him very much and thought that we would have a happy life together. He showed no signs before the week before our wedding. I, along with everyone else, thought it was pre-wedding jitters. Believe me, if I had known this would happen, I NEVER would have walked down that aisle. I would rather have been left at the alter than be married a little over a month and this happen.
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