Feelsgoodman Posted November 27, 2011 Posted November 27, 2011 - I don't like phone calls that isn't strictly business. I'm not into that "hey, how was your day?" crap. - I don't like seeing a person for more than like twice in a week, and I can't stand being around the same person for longer than 6hours. - I don't cuddle. I hate it. - I don't like to "spend the night," or having someone else "spend the night." - Once the sex is done, I will be leaving that same minute, or I expect you to do the same. None of that makes you bad relationship material. In fact, most normal, heterosexual men don't like the stuff listed above either.
wildtrac77 Posted November 27, 2011 Posted November 27, 2011 That's basically whyI 'm single. I just feel that the rewards of being in a relationship are simply not worth the effort. I agree and disagree with that... If you meet the right person ( you click, same intrests, chemistry etc) then its worth it.. the prob is that for every 10 people a guy or girl dates you will be lucky if this happens one out of the ten times!! more often than not its not worth the hassle but just occasional it is.. You gotta be in it to win it, you have to date the 9 bad ones to have a chance to meet the 1 decent one.. male or female..
wildtrac77 Posted November 27, 2011 Posted November 27, 2011 I'm single because: -Im not very girly. I have "masculine" interests like martial arts, video games, and technology.* -I don't have a wide social circle, and most of my friends are in couples, which means they're only friends with other couples. I am one of the rare singles, so it's difficult to meet single guys. -I have no idea where one goes to meet people, especially single people. -I'm apparently intimidating, though I have no idea how... it's just what I've been told. -I'm not what guys like, physically. I wear make-up and decent clothes, but even done up, my guy friends have told me I'm at best a 6.5 or 7 out of 10. Interestingly, if I was a lesbian I'd be swimming in girlfriends... guys NEVER flirt with me, but I get hit on by girls all the time! *This is kind of a double-edged sword; guys who don't share my interests aren't interested in me because my interests aren't typical girl-stuff, and guys who DO share my interests get annoyed and intimidated when they find out I'm as good/better than them. It NEVER fails that when a guy finds out I'm a black belt he tries to prove he could still beat me up... until I put him into a wing lock, and then teasing turns into full-out one-up-manship. Hey, dont be so hard on yourself.. any half decent guy should be snapping at your feet to take you out.. Like another post on here said.. you look pretty cute in your avator..
FitChick Posted November 27, 2011 Posted November 27, 2011 Choice and timing. I met Mr Right at the wrong time (for him). Before him, I was the one who didn't want to get married. I haven't dated that many men in my lifetime because I haven't been attracted to that many. Not that they had to be handsome. Quite the opposite. I am looking for the whole "package." I am re-evaluating my need for someone educated because on a day to day basis, how often do you discuss politics or culture? You can get that from others. It's more about each others daily habits, consideration, affection, caring, appreciation that make or break a couple.
Wolf18 Posted November 27, 2011 Posted November 27, 2011 1) Don't have a car. No woman would want to date a guy that goes and picks her up on his yellow dirtbike 2) I'm 22, work and go to school, but I live at home and this is something that women my age don't seem to like, even if they themselves live at home . And while I've been saving money lately, I'm not wealthy by any stretch of the imagination. 3) I'm like 5'8, almost all women think that being over 6 feet tall gives you magical powers where you can't lose a fight and have an enormous penis, even if you're a disshoveled drug addict who wears wedding dresses and doesn't bathe like Russell Brand. The general height cut off for women is around 5'10. Even if you're just a few inches shorter than that, you have to have a lot of other things going for you to get a chance. I find even the really intelligent girls that I get along with still have this hang up. 4) I'm not as exaggerratedly muscular as most women prefer. This is something that changed my life in relation to women completely, and honestly seeing the before and after is probably the main contributor to me being bitter. If you're under 6 feet tall, its kind of an unspoken rule that to be physically attractive to women you have to be very muscular. There's probably more but I can't think of any right now.
soulm8 Posted November 27, 2011 Posted November 27, 2011 I think I'm single because: a) I'm a divorced, single parent who isn't desperate to settle for crumbs. b) Men seem to perceive me as untrustworthy or playing games mostly because of my appearance and independence; they tend to treat me as if I will cheat, lie, etc., as other women in their lives have. This becomes boring, predictable and a turnoff. c) The men who approach me tend to fall into one of two categories: - I can tell they're the "pump and dump" type, only looking for casual sex. - They become insecure and hope that I'll make the first moves. I become friend-zoned in the process because I want to respond to my man (see point b)) d) I need a strong (emotional, spiritual and intellectual) connection before I'll even entertain a physical bond.
Wolf18 Posted November 27, 2011 Posted November 27, 2011 I tried to edit but the obnoxiously small window to edit a post wouldn't let me. I don't think there's anything wrong with me, and actually believe quite a lot to offer using my own criteria. But when it comes to a woman criteria is where I am pretty much the anti-thesis of what women are looking for. My MOMMY and her friends however, say that they can't believe women haven't "discovered" me yet and that it's such a tragic loss for them I can't tell if women in their generation looked for completely different things than women now, or they're just kissing my ass.
FitChick Posted November 27, 2011 Posted November 27, 2011 b) Men seem to perceive me as untrustworthy or playing games mostly because of my appearance What kind of appearance would make a woman look untrustworthy?
soulm8 Posted November 27, 2011 Posted November 27, 2011 What kind of appearance would make a woman look untrustworthy? I don't understand it, but this is my perspective from my own experience. I seem to intimidate most men with my femininity and they mistakenly assume I'll manipulate them with it.
thatone Posted November 27, 2011 Posted November 27, 2011 not a whole lot in common with the vast majority of people where i live. as such my last relationship was long distance and i'm in the process of moving to a different city. outside of that, i won't settle on certain things. at 35 i'm past the idea of wanting physical 'perfection', especially since i'm far from that myself, but on the other hand i do have money and i do have intelligence. so while i'm not out flashing cash at 20 something year olds, the women i meet certainly are competing with those 20 something year olds. the should be smarter and classier than the alternative, often times they are not. that and while it is not hard to get dates in your mid 30s as a man, when you eliminate desire for children that narrows the pool quite a bit. just as i'm not looking for a 35 year old still pretending to be 25, i'm not looking to be some woman's white dress/baby ticket either.
colliejoanie Posted November 28, 2011 Posted November 28, 2011 These are reasons I'm beginning to see as I'm dating..... I'm a 35 year old single mom. (baggage, as has been pointed out) Full time student, working two jobs (not exactly financially attractive to the kind of guy I want) I don't have time or money to go out at night to even meet friends, let alone guys. I'm not skinny. And I'm tall. (which plays on my insecurities) I'm needy, I think. I like to know the person is as in to me as I am in to them. (I hate this about myself).
9Lives Posted November 28, 2011 Posted November 28, 2011 Im single because I guess I keep trying to be in a relationship with guys that dont really want a relationship It could be that I have sex too soon It could be that I dont know how to be in a relationship even tho I want one. I really dont want to be single
soserious1 Posted November 28, 2011 Posted November 28, 2011 My reason for being single? I've deliberately chosen to be so.
D-Lish Posted November 28, 2011 Posted November 28, 2011 My MOMMY and her friends however, say that they can't believe women haven't "discovered" me yet and that it's such a tragic loss for them I can't tell if women in their generation looked for completely different things than women now, or they're just kissing my ass. Probably true. Since I am old enough to be your mother if I had you at 20 ... I am not discerning regarding a guys height, it isn't even something I see. I am 5'7" and I've dated 5'6" to 6'2" without discrimination. I went to a party last night and there was a guy there 6'5"... I found the height a bit of a turn off. My date was the same height as I am, and to be honest, I like being able to look a guy in the eyes, it feels more intimate to me. I am doomed to be single because I choose the wrong people to date time after time.
eleanorhurting Posted November 28, 2011 Posted November 28, 2011 I have issues. I havent really given myself a chance to be single in my adult life let alone date so I need to get used to that and be OK with being alone, meeting people without getting attached or expecting anything. I am single because I have to be right now. I keep getting scared that I will never find someone because of bad things that happened in the past. But i guess i need to just chill.
FrustrationSetsIn Posted November 28, 2011 Posted November 28, 2011 I am single because in my early 20s I was a needy pleaser, I was foolish and slept with a few married women because I thought I was providing them something while I hoped for the relationship to go further. When in actuality if it wasn't me they would had just fooled around with someone else. Then I met my ex fiance whom was like 10 years older than me. I used to be so agreeable and would give in and admit I was wrong during an argument even if I was right. She taught me to stand up for myself and to stick by what I believed in. She also cheated on me twice so when she wanted me to take her back, well I stood up for myself and yeah. From about 25 on, I'm in my early 30s, now I don't put up with ****. I don't act like a hard ass, but I believe in saying what you mean and meaning what you say. Which seems to put off quite a many women these days because I don't always tell them what they want to hear. If they come to me with a problem, I tell them how they could fix it so that I don't hear about the same problem again, maybe sometimes too blunt but it's a solution to their problem. I don't like to rush into anything either, I like to be friendly with a woman for a bit to see if things can go somewhere. To see if I can trust her and all that jazz. Some don't have the patience for this, others just put me in this odd flirty friend zone me and they move on to other guys. So those are some reasons as to why I am single, I'm sure there are many more. But the funny thing is, I always hear years later from ex's or women that friend zoned me how I was the guy they should had kept. Long story short. Madness, the world is MAD!
El Brujo Posted November 28, 2011 Posted November 28, 2011 3) I'm like 5'8, almost all women think that being over 6 feet tall gives you magical powers where you can't lose a fight and have an enormous penis, Well, guess what, Wolfie... it doesn't, and I speak as a guy who's 6'6" (if you don't believe me, go here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WoDW8xQKA_I ). As far as never losing a fight and having an enormous penis, giants are magnets for little roly-poly smartasses who think they can whip anyone, and I don't WANT an enormous penis. (can you imagine what a pain it would be to buy pants?) It would only give people more reason to STARE worse than they do now. I went to a party last night and there was a guy there 6'5"... I found the height a bit of a turn off. Well, at least SOMEONE else isn't afraid to let the secret out... There's this CUTE Middle Eastern woman who works one of the checkout lines at the local Mexican market... but I'm not interested in trying to nab her because she's like 4'8"---almost a freaking midget! (and yes they have one of those working there too) I am doomed to be single because I choose the wrong people to date time after time. You probably need a laundry list. Are you looking for a guy who likes Italian food? Say so. Want a guy who'd rather go hiking or drinking? Make up your mind what you want, then write it down.
Wolf18 Posted November 28, 2011 Posted November 28, 2011 Probably true. Since I am old enough to be your mother if I had you at 20 ... I am not discerning regarding a guys height, it isn't even something I see. I am 5'7" and I've dated 5'6" to 6'2" without discrimination. I went to a party last night and there was a guy there 6'5"... I found the height a bit of a turn off. My date was the same height as I am, and to be honest, I like being able to look a guy in the eyes, it feels more intimate to me. I am doomed to be single because I choose the wrong people to date time after time. I think there are attractive people of all the heights, which is why I don't understand it. I just can't correlate any positive or negative traits to it from my own anecdotal experiences, and to be quite honest women are wrong in thinking that being tall=better protector...back in high school where people have no inhibitions it was the tall lanky kids who unfortunately got bullied the most But I can agree that some men are bad with it too, despite it not being nearly as widespread. At a night club I went to recently there was an absolutely beautiful girl who was like 5'11 with her much shorter friends. Some guy who was like 6'4 in one of those flaming skull ed hardy shirts was hitting on them and they were all crowding around him as is typical at these places, when he introduced himself to them he went in and gave them all a kiss then when he got to her, he looked her right in the face, and even though she said "Hi!" he just completely ignored her and went to the next girl. I saw her face and it looked like she died on the inside lol. I felt really bad for her and was so tempted to go over and cheer her up, then I thought there was a 99.9% chance she would turn her nose up at me if I tried to talk to her just for being 3 inches shorter.
FitChick Posted November 28, 2011 Posted November 28, 2011 I seem to intimidate most men with my femininity and they mistakenly assume I'll manipulate them with it. Do you mean you look like these women?
Avarage Posted November 28, 2011 Posted November 28, 2011 Three reasons why: 1) 'Cause I wasted time. Seriously, in college I was so focused on the future and just having fun with friends, I never really considered dating. 2) The hours I worked. As a cop I was on a rotating shift and the training I went through required a lot of dedication and didn't leave much time for other things. 3)I just switched cities to Indy. This is the biggest reason. I don't know anyone here and looks like I'm going to be working the night shift. Ah well I'd rather be single than without a career and goals.
D-Lish Posted November 28, 2011 Posted November 28, 2011 I think there are attractive people of all the heights, which is why I don't understand it. I just can't correlate any positive or negative traits to it from my own anecdotal experiences, and to be quite honest women are wrong in thinking that being tall=better protector...back in high school where people have no inhibitions it was the tall lanky kids who unfortunately got bullied the most But I can agree that some men are bad with it too, despite it not being nearly as widespread. At a night club I went to recently there was an absolutely beautiful girl who was like 5'11 with her much shorter friends. Some guy who was like 6'4 in one of those flaming skull ed hardy shirts was hitting on them and they were all crowding around him as is typical at these places, when he introduced himself to them he went in and gave them all a kiss then when he got to her, he looked her right in the face, and even though she said "Hi!" he just completely ignored her and went to the next girl. I saw her face and it looked like she died on the inside lol. I felt really bad for her and was so tempted to go over and cheer her up, then I thought there was a 99.9% chance she would turn her nose up at me if I tried to talk to her just for being 3 inches shorter. Confidence is more key than height in my opinion. That's what attracts me. I'd take a confident, witty, average looking guy over a "tall dude" with an inflated ego any day. My brother is 6'5", and a hockey player- he's a good looking guy, tall and naturally lean but a bit built. He's also shy and awkward and he never had much luck with women growing up. Had he had confidence he probably could have dated a lot more women. I have never looked "up" to find a partner, I really like looking straight ahead.
Wolf18 Posted November 28, 2011 Posted November 28, 2011 Well, guess what, Wolfie... it doesn't, and I speak as a guy who's 6'6" (if you don't believe me, go here: [COLOR=#660000]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WoDW8xQKA_I[/COLOR] ).[/Quote] I don't know friend, I think you have a significant advantage in attracting women when you are 6'6. If that's you in the video, don't take this the wrong way, but you need to lose some weight to reap the benefits. As far as never losing a fight and having an enormous penis, giants are magnets for little roly-poly smartasses who think they can whip anyone, and I don't WANT an enormous penis. (can you imagine what a pain it would be to buy pants?) It would only give people more reason to STARE worse than they do now.[/Quote] There is some truth to that, but don't blame them blame women. Women tell guys who aren't as tall that they are not real men because a guy whose tall is much bigger, so these guys think they can change a girls default mode of thought by beating down some very tall guy. They're just trying to get girls to like them, it's unfortunate.
ditzchic Posted November 28, 2011 Posted November 28, 2011 1. I'm extremely guarded and basically emotionally unavailable 2. I have commitment issues (I tend to freak out after a month or two or when he starts throwing around the word "girlfriend".) See issue 1. 3. I demand butterflies and if I don't feel them I don't even bother. 4. I live in a small area with very few people I have things in common with. 5. I'm extremely picky. A third date with me is a rarity. See 1,2,3 and 4. Basically, I'm a hot mess who isn't really ready to not be single.
Wolf18 Posted November 28, 2011 Posted November 28, 2011 Confidence is more key than height in my opinion. That's what attracts me. I'd take a confident, witty, average looking guy over a "tall dude" with an inflated ego any day. My brother is 6'5", and a hockey player- he's a good looking guy, tall and naturally lean but a bit built. He's also shy and awkward and he never had much luck with women growing up. Had he had confidence he probably could have dated a lot more women. I have never looked "up" to find a partner, I really like looking straight ahead. Ehh...I'd say I'm pretty confident, but it's pretty much set in stone that a girl in her 20's whose 5'11 isn't going to get excited about a guy whose a few inches shorter. It's a shame too, there's quite a few girls who are tall that would think I'm fun and don't consider them "masculine" what so ever, if they gave it a shot, but at the end of the day the 6'4 guy is going to be what they lust after.
D-Lish Posted November 28, 2011 Posted November 28, 2011 Ehh...I'd say I'm pretty confident, but it's pretty much set in stone that a girl in her 20's whose 5'11 isn't going to get excited about a guy whose a few inches shorter. It's a shame too, there's quite a few girls who are tall that would think I'm fun and don't consider them "masculine" what so ever, if they gave it a shot, but at the end of the day the 6'4 guy is going to be what they lust after. I'd say you just negated being "pretty confident" by even mentioning your height as an issue, It's not an issue for many of us women.
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