When you meet for the first time after chatting online, isn't the area usually

[PhillyDude]

in the downtown area of whatever city you live in?

 

I had a 1st date earlier and we met in the downtown section of philly and when she found out I lived downtown she stated I purposely planned the date in the downtown area so I wouldn't have to travel far?

 

Can I help that I live in downtown philly? Where else do two people meet if they are going on a 1st date? I normally plan the second date in her area. But i always thought the downtown area was a mutual meeting spot?

[FitChick]

Depends what you want to do. I don't live near the beach but if the man wanted to go to a beach restaurant I wouldn't object. If you are quibbling about things like this now, forget about dating this one.

 

Philly is pretty much a crime ridden slum these days, isn't it?

[Cypress25]

Depends. If you both live in the suburbs, then you probably wouldn't meet downtown, since it would be inconvenient for both of you. If one person lives downtown and one person lives in the suburbs, you should meet somewhere in the middle.

 

If I was planning to meet a guy and he deliberately picked a place that was far away and inconvenient for me, I would be a little annoyed. If downtown is convenient for both people, great, meet there. Otherwise, meet in the middle.

[PhillyDude]

Depends. If you both live in the suburbs, then you probably wouldn't meet downtown, since it would be inconvenient for both of you. If one person lives downtown and one person lives in the suburbs, you should meet somewhere in the middle.

 

If I was planning to meet a guy and he deliberately picked a place that was far away and inconvenient for me, I would be a little annoyed. If downtown is convenient for both people, great, meet there. Otherwise, meet in the middle.

 

If you both lived in the suburbs I guess you would meet the nearest shopping center

[Cee]

I'd say downtown Philly dates are pretty normal for a first date. Although I usually suggested dating spots where there was good parking. I don't drive, but a lot of my dates did. I didn't want to burden them with a huge parking bill or a ticket. Philadelphia Parking Authority is brutal.

 

A large proportion of my first dates were in my old neighborhood near Fishtown. Parking was good and there are a ton of cool spots. In fact, my first date with my boyfriend was in my neighborhood. He suggested meeting in Fishtown so I could take a walk and show him the neighborhood. His offer of coming to meet me was incredibly thoughtful.

 

But downtown is fine. The area is loaded with things to do.

[PhillyDude]

I'd say downtown Philly dates are pretty normal for a first date. Although I usually suggested dating spots where there was good parking. I don't drive, but a lot of my dates did. I didn't want to burden them with a huge parking bill or a ticket. Philadelphia Parking Authority is brutal.

 

A large proportion of my first dates were in my old neighborhood near Fishtown. Parking was good and there are a ton of cool spots. In fact, my first date with my boyfriend was in my neighborhood. He suggested meeting in Fishtown so I could take a walk and show him the neighborhood. His offer of coming to meet me was incredibly thoughtful.

 

But downtown is fine. The area is loaded with things to do.

 

 

 

Even when I lived at home with my mom in west philly I still met in downtown philly because you said it was more to see and more to do. The girl I met tonight lives in Olney so it wasn't that far.

[Cypress25]

If you both lived in the suburbs I guess you would meet the nearest shopping center

 

I don't know what the Philadelphia suburbs are like, but I think most suburbs of major cities have an urban core with restaurants, movie theaters, bars, and coffee shops. I grew up in a suburb of DC and I never had any need to go downtown because the suburbs had everything that DC had, except the museums. Now I live in downtown Baltimore and my friends in the suburbs never want to visit me because parking is expensive and our public transport is pathetic.

[Star Gazer]

I live in the 'burbs, in an area where there isn't much to do. I usually have to go into the city/downtown to do anything social, so it's never occurred to me to care/mind going downtown for a date.

 

That said, nearly every guy I've ever met has suggested to think of/find a place closer to me...not him, even if he lives in the city/downtown.

[PhillyDude]

I live in the 'burbs, in an area where there isn't much to do. I usually have to go into the city/downtown to do anything social, so it's never occurred to me to care/mind going downtown for a date.

 

That said, nearly every guy I've ever met has suggested to think of/find a place closer to me...not him, even if he lives in the city/downtown.

 

I do that on the 2nd date and after.

[Cypress25]

I do that on the 2nd date and after.

 

Maybe you should change your strategy. First date, pick a place closer to her. Second date, pick a place downtown. After all, the first date is the time to show her the most considerate side of you, otherwise you might not get a second date.

[PhillyDude]

Maybe you should change your strategy. First date, pick a place closer to her. Second date, pick a place downtown. After all, the first date is the time to show her the most considerate side of you, otherwise you might not get a second date.

 

I will give that some thought for the future.

[PhillyDude]

Only one thing is important on the first, second or 'whatever' date. Where is SHE most comfortable meeting. What is convenient for HER.

 

I would never give the slightest hint of push back on a location especially if she didn't know me well. After you've met a few times it would be natural for her to be accomodating. if not, there is some other dynamic going on. However, I want a woman to feel as safe and comfortable as possible with me.

 

And that's the choose the area I did tonight. it was the UPENN area with outdoor seating in front of a cafe and a very lit up public area with lots of people and traffic.

[dasein]

I had a 1st date earlier and we met in the downtown section of philly and when she found out I lived downtown she stated I purposely planned the date in the downtown area so I wouldn't have to travel far?

 

Was she obviously teasing when she said this? If not, this one is a loser, move to next.

[oaks]

Was she obviously teasing when she said this? If not, this one is a loser, move to next.

 

I was thinking that she was probably teasing. In that case, one response would be something like "Yes, you got me there. Next time we can meet near your place." (That'll come off badly if you dead-pan it; she needs to know that you know she's teasing you and that you're teasing her back.)