headsashed Posted November 27, 2011 Posted November 27, 2011 (edited) sounds like forever to me now,11 weeks since i lost what i thought was the love of my life. This is basically an update to what im feeling and whats been going off etc. So,1st off all im feeling like im 50% over her,i dont get the urge to contact her anymore but i still do think about her probs 50% of the day,if not a little more,it shows how far ive come i think. The sad thing is,is i do see her just about everyday,maybe thats why im feeling like i do? even though i dont feel nowhere near as bad as i did,i reckon if she got a bf tomorrow i would be totally smashed. So i think i maybe deluding myself here a little bit,i dunno lol. I suppose im just venting right now lol. My ex is always the 1 that txts me 1st,now,i dont always reply but sometimes i do,i admit that,and i know i shouldnt be doing,but sometimes she says things that gets me and thats why i reply,grr, she still has hold of me doesnt she? i know she has. Yesterday she came to mine for this "talk" she wanted,apparently she wanted NC because she is confused,anyway,my door was locked so she couldnt just walk in anymore,i ignored her knocks and then she rang me,oh dear lol,she could hear it,i let her in but told her she had 5 mins as i had to go out,which i did anyway,she told me about work etc,then left to goto work,hmm,so much for talking. Today she txt me out the blue again asking for something,i replied as i had to give her this pooo back,she came,had 5 mins,asked me personally questions then left. I kept things short and simple and didnt give anything away., Now tonight she gone to a party so its obvoious i wont hear from her but its still stupid of me to even answer her txts etc. In reality,or in my own eyes i do think im 50% over her because i dont have the urge to contact her anymore,i eat and sleep fine now,i can go about my day without crying or anything,but,she still has something over me,the questiong is,what? Edited November 27, 2011 by headsashed
wow123 Posted November 27, 2011 Posted November 27, 2011 Hey man, I'm sorry to hear what you are going through. Just seeing an ex often is going to make it harder to get over them, but not impossible as long as you aren't talking. From an outsiders point of view, I'm not sure what her intentions are, but it looks like she's doing everything she can to keep you from moving on. That's really not fair. Showing up at your door? Texting? Calling? Wow, she's making it impossible for you. She needs to decide what she wants. If it's you and you want her, great. If not you need to tell her to stop so that you can move on.
Author headsashed Posted November 27, 2011 Author Posted November 27, 2011 Hey man, I'm sorry to hear what you are going through. Just seeing an ex often is going to make it harder to get over them, but not impossible as long as you aren't talking. From an outsiders point of view, I'm not sure what her intentions are, but it looks like she's doing everything she can to keep you from moving on. That's really not fair. Showing up at your door? Texting? Calling? Wow, she's making it impossible for you. She needs to decide what she wants. If it's you and you want her, great. If not you need to tell her to stop so that you can move on. Believe me pal,ive told her eveyrthing,but she still does what she does,im moving on,but slower than i should because of how she is. She rang my phone the other night for some stupid reason so i told her that we have to sort this crap out,she said yes,wee need to talk,tne she went on to tell me she still wants NC and she will come the next day to sort whatever out,she said her mind was made up and its what she wanted,i said fair enough like,next day came,she said nothing about it,infact she she came,had a few jokes,told me about work,even what she had for dinner,then left,wtf? The thing is,i actually realise its upto me to stop this but something keeps stopping me from saying something? i think now its upto me to sort it,not her,all she is gonna do is rip me apart again, i believe its a case of "she doesnt want me but she doesnt want anyone else to have me"
wow123 Posted November 27, 2011 Posted November 27, 2011 So you realize it's up to you to stop this cycle. That's good. Now when you want to you will. She either doesn't want to you to move on because she doesn't want anyone else to have you, or she doesn't know what she wants. Either way it's not fair to you.
Author headsashed Posted November 27, 2011 Author Posted November 27, 2011 So you realize it's up to you to stop this cycle. That's good. Now when you want to you will. She either doesn't want to you to move on because she doesn't want anyone else to have you, or she doesn't know what she wants. Either way it's not fair to you. From what she has told me she doesnt know what she wants,but actions speak louder than words right? so she contacts me everyday,visits me just about everyday,but we havent kissed or anything since we broke up,well,a week into the break up we did kiss passionately but thats about it. So to me she loves me but is holding back? ive made no attempt to kiss her or anything either as she was the 1 that broke up with me,but that actually leaves me kind of confused,even though ive accepted the break up etc. I actually want to txt her tonight for the 1st time and say something,like,what is it that u really want? or,leave me alone,i dunno,tonight is the 1st night in weeks that ive felt a little emotional over this because i do feel something isnt fully right,i dunno,she confuses me lol,but she is at a party so maybe i shouldnt txt her anything? then again my emotional well being is still at stake.
Author headsashed Posted November 27, 2011 Author Posted November 27, 2011 I went to bed shortly after i posted my last reply as i was super tired,anyway,my ex actually txts measking if id been with anyone,she knew that i was having an house warming party with my friends,i didnt reply so she txt again with just question marks,so i ignored and then she rang me,i answered grrr,she asked me outright if i had been with anyone last night,wtf? i told her to stop been stupid now and am fed up of it all and it all needs sorting and that im gonig cos im gonig to sleep,i put phone down and then she txts me asknig what needs sorting out,i never replied and just went to sleep. Today ive not heard anything so sod knows lol. Shes crazy
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