Theory on Why Most Girls Don't Seem Interested in Hooking Up at Bars and Clubs

November 26, 2011

This is a theory I've been working on for a while. It will hopefully attempt to answer two big nightlife questions I've had for a while.

1. Why do many groups of girls, drink, dance, talk to a bunch of guys, reject them ALL and leave? Is NO guy good enough for them? Don't they want to hook up with SOMEONE?

2. Why is it so easy to hook up on vacation, but quite challenging back home?

Keep in mind, this is a generalization. There are no 100 percent rules in this game. (There will always be some hookups going on.) First, it is no secret that generally, guys go out to get laid, while women go out for drinks, attention, and an ego boost. The AW type girl is famous for that. But what always puzzled me is the huge quantity of guys that they would reject. Some were some really good looking tall buff young dudes. Other groups of girls just seem uninterested in meeting men period. Are they lesbian? Do they not have needs too?

I believe it is due to the cell phone and text messaging and the so called "Booty Call" or more recently "The Booty Text." You see, that girl that flirted with, took drinks from, and rejected several guys doesn't NEED any of them. She also doesn't need to look like a sl&t by going home with one of them. Like any decent looking girl, she has at LEAST one FB or ex-bf's number stored in her phone.

So, she can get into the venue free (usually), have guys buy her drinks, dance lesbian with her gfs, and get a HUGE ego boost by rejecting a bunch of guys. Then, when she gets home with her buzz still on (that the bar/club dudes paid for), she will booty text her FB and have him come over to b&ng the sh*t out of her.

It's a win win win for her. She has a fun evening out and can still have hot sex in the end if she desires. Why go home with some strange dude that could be dangerous, a creeper, or bad in the sack? Why not stick with a guy she KNOWS is good in the sack and she's comfortable with? Plus, she can text him AFTER her gfs drop her off for the evening, so nobody is the wiser. (That eliminates the "looking like a sl*t" concern.)

So back to my other question, why is it easier to score on vacation than back home? Certainly people feel less inhibited on vacation. But more importantly, when she is away from home, SHE DOESN'T HAVE ACCESS TO HER FBs AT HOME. If she wants to get laid on vacation, she HAS to find a guy THERE to hook up with (unless she happens to know someone in that city).

So, to summarize, while all the rejected guys at the end of the night are scratching their heads asking themselves the following questions:

1. Where did I go wrong? That chick was soo into me.

2. Do I need to buy more seduction products?

3. Did I forget to neg or not stack enough routines LOL.

4. Do I need more gel for my mohawk LOL?

5. Does this t-shirt make me look fat LOL?

You have to realize that to SOME extent, the game may be rigged. A lot of girls may have NO intention of hooking up at the bar or club. They just want to party. When they want sex at the end of the night, they can order it faster than a pizza by sending a booty text to a guy they are ALREADY f*cking.

November 26, 2011

They know that the odds are good that any guy they meet in a place like that just wants a one night stand. They don't. They just want to have a fun night out with their friends.

November 26, 2011

I never had any problem with it.

November 26, 2011

You have to realize that to SOME extent, the game may be rigged. A lot of girls may have NO intention of hooking up at the bar or club. They just want to party. When they want sex at the end of the night, they can order it faster than a pizza by sending a booty text to a guy they are ALREADY f*cking.

So the girls should play by the rules and only go to the club if they want to hook up with someone they meet at the club?

November 26, 2011

I don't know, I think a lot of girls do want to meet guys when they go to bars/clubs. I see good looking confident guys getting #s all the time.

November 27, 2011

Don't they want to hook up with SOMEONE?

Probably not. They just want to enjoy a night out with their friends. Not all girls who go to bars/clubs want to be picked up.

First, it is no secret that generally, guys go out to get laid, while women go out for drinks, attention, and an ego boost.

Most women don't go out looking for an ego boost. In fact, they're probably hoping that all the creepy bar guys will leave them alone. Ever heard the Pink song "You and Your Hand"? Explains it perfectly.

Other groups of girls just seem uninterested in meeting men period. Are they lesbian? Do they not have needs too?

They probably have boyfriends. They're just out for a girls' night; they're not looking to meet men.

A lot of girls may have NO intention of hooking up at the bar or club. They just want to party.

Exactly. But that's not a rigged game, as you call it. That's just a bunch of girls who enjoy going out to bars/clubs with their friends. Nothing wrong with that. They're not trying to mislead you. No one ever said these girls were looking for a hookup. You made that assumption on your own, and you have only yourself to blame for that. Don't blame the girls for not hooking up with you.

Also, what these girls do after they leave the bar/club is none of your business. You're assuming that they all go home and have sex, but that's just another assumption based on nothing. Maybe some of them leave and call their boyfriend/FB/husband, but many of them go home and go to sleep. Not all young, attractive women need to have sex after a night out. Sometimes it's fun to just go out with friends, and then go home to bed when you're tired. Just because a young woman is attractive and sociable doesn't necessarily mean she's sleeping around. Don't assume that a woman must be having sex with someone else, just because she doesn't want to have sex with you.

November 27, 2011

Probably not. They just want to enjoy a night out with their friends. Not all girls who go to bars/clubs want to be picked up.

Most women don't go out looking for an ego boost. In fact, they're probably hoping that all the creepy bar guys will leave them alone. Ever heard the Pink song "You and Your Hand"? Explains it perfectly.

They probably have boyfriends. They're just out for a girls' night; they're not looking to meet men.

Exactly. But that's not a rigged game, as you call it. That's just a bunch of girls who enjoy going out to bars/clubs with their friends. Nothing wrong with that. They're not trying to mislead you. No one ever said these girls were looking for a hookup. You made that assumption on your own, and you have only yourself to blame for that. Don't blame the girls for not hooking up with you.

Also, what these girls do after they leave the bar/club is none of your business. You're assuming that they all go home and have sex, but that's just another assumption based on nothing. Maybe some of them leave and call their boyfriend/FB/husband, but many of them go home and go to sleep. Not all young, attractive women need to have sex after a night out. Sometimes it's fun to just go out with friends, and then go home to bed when you're tired. Just because a young woman is attractive and sociable doesn't necessarily mean she's sleeping around. Don't assume that a woman must be having sex with someone else, just because she doesn't want to have sex with you.

Still dont understand why girls are making it so hard to get w/them .

November 27, 2011

Still dont understand why girls are making it so hard to get w/them

Well, what do you want with these girls? A date? Possibly a relationship? Or just sex? If they don't want what you want, it will be impossible to get with them. Not because they're playing hard to get, but because they don't want what you're selling.

November 27, 2011

They know that the odds are good that any guy they meet in a place like that just wants a one night stand. They don't. They just want to have a fun night out with their friends.

Unless they meet a guy who is normally out of their league. When that happens, they spread their legs almost by instinct.

November 27, 2011

Well, what do you want with these girls? A date? Possibly a relationship? Or just sex? If they don't want what you want, it will be impossible to get with them. Not because they're playing hard to get, but because they don't want what you're selling.

Girls always are up for exciting sex with a stud WHETHER THEY REALIZE IT CONSCIOUSLY OR NOT. Girls rarely go out with the conscious intention of sexing, but they're still poppin' babies which means they still want to have sex on a subconscious, primal level. They just want to be lead into sex with a guy who'll bring out their sexy side, take the responsibility, and make it comfortable for her (which very few guys who're at bars and clubs can actually do). They're looking for a real man who won't stop at first rejection but has the balls to power through.

Besides, why would they drink!? If they're just hanging out with friends, they'd be uninhibited and wouldn't need alcohol!

November 27, 2011

They know that the odds are good that any guy they meet in a place like that just wants a one night stand. They don't. They just want to have a fun night out with their friends.

When I read the thread title I thought almost exactly your words...

It would have saved the OP tons of wasted time if he had just asked before all his time was spent in creating his theories.

November 27, 2011

When I read the thread title I thought almost exactly your words...

It would have saved the OP tons of wasted time if he had just asked before all his time was spent in creating his theories.

LOL, Okay lets open a new night club where only girls are allowed and see how many groups of "girls night out" girls actually hang out there.

November 27, 2011

They know that the odds are good that any guy they meet in a place like that just wants a one night stand. They don't. They just want to have a fun night out with their friends.

LOL, Okay lets open a new night club where only girls are allowed and see how many groups of "girls night out" girls actually hang out there.

November 27, 2011

They're looking for a real man who won't stop at first rejection but has the balls to power through.

Hahaha, I love it when a man tries to tell me what ALL WOMEN want. Because we're all the same and we all want the same things, of course.

Besides, why would they drink!? If they're just hanging out with friends, they'd be uninhibited and wouldn't need alcohol!

Some people just like to drink. Not everyone drinks to get rid of their inhibitions. Why do you think men drink beer when they're watching football with the guys? It's not because they NEED alcohol, they just want to enjoy a drink with their friends.

If you're so upset about all the girls who go out to bars/clubs and won't have sex with you, why don't you just stay home?

November 27, 2011

So, your theory really boils down to two obvious points:

1. Many women like to get dressed up and have cocktails/ go dancing with their female friends

2. Many of these women are not interested in you or other single guys because they are already involved with other guys (ranging from casual to serious).

I could have told you that. As for your your assertion that no women would go to a bar without men to ogle them, many do. They are called gay bars.

November 27, 2011

I've never once left a club with a guy no matter how hot he was. I never go to a club with the intent of finding a hook up or boyfriend. I talk to the opposite sex. I always have my options open, but when guys ask me to come "over and cuddle," I say to them "Are you crazy? No, I do not go home with randoms." Girls with low self esteem go home with randoms, looking for love. Smart girls who are confident know better, because going home with someone ends in disease or heartbreak. Girls release the cuddle hormone oxytocin and they start to get attached to their hook ups. It's a recipe for disaster for the girl.

November 27, 2011

I go two ways on this. First is why would a girl want to hook up with some guy she doesn't even know if she's got a FWB that she does know and who she can call when she gets home? You can hardly blame her for that. But second, if a guy is hot enough there are tons of girls who will go home with him even though they just met him..

November 27, 2011

I go two ways on this. First is why would a girl want to hook up with some guy she doesn't even know if she's got a FWB that she does know and who she can call when she gets home? You can hardly blame her for that. But second, if a guy is hot enough there are tons of girls who will go home with him even though they just met him..

As was menionted earlier girls always are up for an exciting **** with a stud WHETHER THEY REALIZE IT CONSCIOUSLY OR NOT.They just want to be lead into sex with a guy who'll bring out their sexy side, take the responsibility, and make it comfortable for her.

*

Who the **** wants to keep eating the same lame ass pepperoni pizza they've been eating for two months when they can have a slice of the supreme

November 27, 2011

As was menionted earlier girls always are up for an exciting **** with a stud WHETHER THEY REALIZE IT CONSCIOUSLY OR NOT.They just want to be lead into sex with a guy who'll bring out their sexy side, take the responsibility, and make it comfortable for her.

*
Who the **** wants to keep eating the same lame ass pepperoni pizza they've been eating for two months when they can have a slice of the supreme

Better question...who the **** wants to be eating pizza at all when they can get a real meal?

November 27, 2011

You have to realize that to SOME extent, the game may be rigged. A lot of girls may have NO intention of hooking up at the bar or club. They just want to party. When they want sex at the end of the night, they can order it faster than a pizza by sending a booty text to a guy they are ALREADY f*cking.

Bear in mind also:

1) Women don't want to be seen as "whores" for going home with random strangers. Look how many guys here would instantly classify this girl as a "whore" or "slut" as opposed to trying to make it go further.

2) Women want guaranteed good sex. The FB is that. She would not have agreed to the deal if the guy didn't perform and give her multiple orgasms. With a stranger you end up possibly arguing with him on condoms, then worse if he gets himself off and then rolls over to sleep without getting her off.

3) It's also a trust issue. We men have less problem going home with a stranger to bang, but women need to trust the guy.

I agree much of the "dress sexy" routine in the club scene is because bouncers and men will pander and cater the world to these women. A pack of five hot single women in short dresses and heels will command a room...because society allows it. Men will buy them drinks in the hopes of buying their attention. Bouncers comp them at the door because those stupid guys will make the club revenue by buying them drinks. That's life.

What do these women want? IMHO they want that night with the girls, but they're OPEN to the ABOVE AVERAGE guy.

So decent looking guy in jeans and a polo tries to buy her a drink..."yawn".

Uber-handsome trust fund baby in the corner booth with $500 bottles of champagne invites her to sit with him..."YES!"

Deal with it...in the CLUB SCENE it's a shallow world where looks and money get you ahead and it will never change. It's why I tell many men and women to not bother with that world when seeking mates.

November 27, 2011

*Girls are out hoping to meet the man of their dreams. Failing that, they'll hook up with a guy who's got game and makes it happen. Failing that she'll go home alone with her friends then get sex from her FB that night or week. What she wont do is hook up with any old chode just because she's horny, unless she's a total slut. Girls are always looking for the next best thing, if they weren't they'd be dating their FBs not just using them for sex.

If you're not offering anything better than what they already have, then don't expect them to hook up with you. It's not something you should use as an excuse, more as a motivator to up your game and push the sets harder. Your competition isn't only the other guys at the bar, it's the douchebag she's banging on the side that she can go off to anytime no better options come along. *You need to really differentiate yourself from just another random guy to have casual sex with, instead be the guy who sweeps her off her feet and charms her pants off (literally).*

November 27, 2011

As was menionted earlier girls always are up for an exciting **** with a stud WHETHER THEY REALIZE IT CONSCIOUSLY OR NOT.They just want to be lead into sex with a guy who'll bring out their sexy side, take the responsibility, and make it comfortable for her.

*
Who the **** wants to keep eating the same lame ass pepperoni pizza they've been eating for two months when they can have a slice of the supreme

Every time I think your posts can't get more corny, you surprise me. If you talk IRL like you post here, it's no wonder you keep striking out.

November 27, 2011

Every time I think your posts can't get more corny, you surprise me. If you talk IRL like you post here, it's no wonder you keep striking out.

Snarky. You know you love it.

November 28, 2011

It's not that they won't hook up with anyone (as if they refuse to or something), there's usually just

so

many other factors involved (did they meet any cool guys in the first place? Are they cool themselves? Did the convo flow smoothly and did the guy even try to do anything? Then obviously logistics are a huge factor).

Although I guess I can agree on the percentage, but the other 90% hopefully doesn't just include total prudes and girls in relationships (more likely it's made up of those other factors I mentioned). The number one problem most guys have is they can't flirt too well and they can't make moves (or their moves are ****ty). If you have even something as low as 50% of guys fitting that description, now the numbers start looking pretty damn good for me.

Not to mention, unless I've unknowingly been finding all the skanks, I generally don't think it's that "hard" to make **** happen. The hard part (once you're semi-decent at conversation) is making moves and logistics- and neither of those are hard either if you've got balls and made decent plans. For me, if I want to kiss a girl, that's generally what I do, and she generally allows it with no issue. I do that a ****load more often than anyone else I know- is it because I'

m

magically scoping out those 10% girls or is it because most guys are pussies? Even some of my friends who are semi-decent are too afraid to do something as "intimate" as make out with a girl, or even build up a decent amount of attraction in the first place,

so

sex isn't even a remote possibility most nights for them unless they're caught in an absolutely perfect situation.

I'

m

not Charlie Kaufman, but neither am I Brad Pitt. But when 80-90% of guys are chodes or mediocre at best, it's no wonder most girls aren't hooking up with them. Either way that's totally irrelevant to me (unless, like I said, I've magically been finding all the skanks). Then again (like you said), if 80-90% of guys are chodes, then 80-90% of them won't be getting laid in a regular night at a bar/club. I dunno. I just think it's pointless to mention the numbers for a situation like that (mainly because it's running pretty close to saying that the 90% of girls aren't open to sex at all, but we all know that about 90% of them- the single ones at least, plus probably some of the taken ones- would be totally open to ****ing Brad Pitt if they met him at a bar).

November 28, 2011

I've never once left a club with a guy no matter how hot he was. I never go to a club with the intent of finding a hook up or boyfriend. I talk to the opposite sex. I always have my options open, but when guys ask me to come "over and cuddle," I say to them "Are you crazy? No, I do not go home with randoms." Girls with low self esteem go home with randoms, looking for love. Smart girls who are confident know better, because going home with someone ends in disease or heartbreak. Girls release the cuddle hormone oxytocin and they start to get attached to their hook ups. It's a recipe for disaster for the girl.

I completely disagree. Women want to meet a cool guy and get ****ed when they are out. Why do you think they dress so sexy and take the time to look good? Sure, they like validation, but they want to have sex -- they love it! They don't want to get hit on, get free drinks, and go home alone. The problem is 99% of the guys that go out to the bars suck with women. They are needy bitch chodes that can't communicate as a man to a woman.*

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Theory on Why Most Girls Don't Seem Interested in Hooking Up at Bars and Clubs

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