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honeymoon period

lolita jade

By lolita jade
in Breaks and Breaking Up

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lolita jade Established Member

lolita jade

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Hi All

 

Just wondering as my ex met someone else and was initially very confused about her or me? after 25 years and tells me and everyone else he is very happy, how long does the honeymoon period normally last? how long does it take to realise the grass is not greener?

 

I have accepted he has someone else but just curious. I don't even think I will want him now but curious in a kind of cruel way hoping it will all go wrong for him.

 

Thanks :)

mike588 Established Member

mike588

Posted
Posted
Hi All

 

Just wondering as my ex met someone else and was initially very confused about her or me? after 25 years and tells me and everyone else he is very happy, how long does the honeymoon period normally last? how long does it take to realise the grass is not greener?

 

I have accepted he has someone else but just curious. I don't even think I will want him now but curious in a kind of cruel way hoping it will all go wrong for him.

 

Thanks :)

 

It all depends on the person/s. I'm guessing around 6 months but then again it could be shorter or longer.

 

There is always the chance,,, chance that the grass could be greener?

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lolita jade Established Member

lolita jade

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I hear what you are saying Mike. It could be. She has three kids. Ours are adult. He doesnt do other peoples kids. A whole lot of other things that didnt seem right for him to choose her over me.

 

Even though I dont see him at all or talk to him just wondered what time scale i was looking at. it has been 4 months now.

 

Thought it might help other victims of possible rebounds/ GIGS too.

mike588 Established Member

mike588

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I hear what you are saying Mike. It could be. She has three kids. Ours are adult. He doesnt do other peoples kids. A whole lot of other things that didnt seem right for him to choose her over me.

 

Even though I dont see him at all or talk to him just wondered what time scale i was looking at. it has been 4 months now.

 

Thought it might help other victims of possible rebounds/ GIGS too.

 

I was a rebound, it sucks.

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lolita jade Established Member

lolita jade

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Poor you.

 

Not good being somebody's band aid/ experiment. Bet you feel so used.

 

Still you will be wary to ask questions in future before taking up a love interest. It's a shame we have to learn the hard way all the time.

mike588 Established Member

mike588

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Poor you.

 

Not good being somebody's band aid/ experiment. Bet you feel so used.

 

Still you will be wary to ask questions in future before taking up a love interest. It's a shame we have to learn the hard way all the time.

 

Yea it was a tough lesson to learn,I'm still paying for it.never again!!

 

If your ex. isn't into kids it probably wont last long

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lolita jade Established Member

lolita jade

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He was telling me he has a new family. He gets on well with them. They get on well with him. This was when he he known her 2 months and I had known a week. She introduced him very quickly. You cant play around with kids heads like that.

 

Still his bed to lie in now.

mike588 Established Member

mike588

Posted
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He was telling me he has a new family. He gets on well with them. They get on well with him. This was when he he known her 2 months and I had known a week. She introduced him very quickly. You cant play around with kids heads like that.

 

Still his bed to lie in now.

 

He may be happy now but give it time. He if doesn't like kids they will eventually get to him.

Rorschach64 Established Member

Rorschach64

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Jade,

 

You know that pondering on this won't change that he is gone. He is just saying what ever because he is trying to convience his crazy selfish ass that he is happy and some how magically has a new family in a few months.

 

Pondering will only eat you up and delay moving on but I'll give you this much, it is hard to stop thinking about a break up.

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lolita jade Established Member

lolita jade

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Hi Rors,

 

No its ok. don't know whether you have seen some of my recent posts. Since he was so off with me last weekend it was the last straw. I really am exhausted with the whole thing. That heart ache pain has gone at last and I have accepted it. I am actuallu not scared anymore of life alone and actually excited by what it could offer for me.

 

Although I was pondering for a while last night. It was in a cruel way. Hoping that he is going to go tits up. I dont think I want him now. I am bordering on disliking him not for the other woman now but for how he is treating me now. Like I am his enemy.

 

I dont want t end up hating him.

M2155 Established Member

M2155

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LJ, I meant to comment. I don't think you need to worry about it. You have so much history with this guy, if he leaves it's his loss and you have the right attitude. While it's always possible things will work out with him and OW, I think she'll end up being the one spinning her wheels trying and worrying that he might go back to you. Of course she wants to believe she "rescued" him from his 25 years of unhappiness(?), but she fears you. Especially if he was seeing her while he was still with you, that detail is not lost on her.

 

And when that time comes I hope you don't let him sniffing around just because things get shaky just because you're the most comfortable place for him to go. You want him to want you, not just to realize the OW wasn't all she was cracked up to be. Either way, you sound like you will be okay;)

Edited by M2155
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lolita jade Established Member

lolita jade

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He wasnt with me when he met her, we were seperated but we used to have coffee, go out for day together and he told her and me that he had strong feelings for me. I think this is classed as sort of being with me in a roundabout way as I used to say I wanted to get back together and not once did he say it was definately over. And like I have said in previous posts he did say early on he would tell her he wanted a break and would try with me and he also aid if it doesn't work with her could we try again ha ha.

 

I am exhausted by the whole thing as I say and can't believe how happy I feel now I have accepted it.

 

I think too possibly he may not ever live with her and just try to keep to weekends only and when kids are at school so he has a fun relationship without toking on her kids. Maybe wrong but not my problem anymore.

 

Am starting to see his bad points during the marriage now and starting to dislike him and have a feeling of wanting to avoid him now rather than missing him.

 

Can't believe the transformation since last weekend.

M2155 Established Member

M2155

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Am starting to see his bad points during the marriage now and starting to dislike him and have a feeling of wanting to avoid him now rather than missing him.

 

Same for me (minus the marriage)... It is amazing!!

I would put money on him coming back around at some point though, keep your head straight :)

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lolita jade Established Member

lolita jade

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I am pretty sure I will tell him to F O now. But want to keep my dignaty and to rise above it. I will keep my head M2155. You too if yours comes sniffing back :)

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