yello243 Posted November 24, 2011 Posted November 24, 2011 How do you get over your first love? How did you do it? Me and my now ex of almost 6 years broke up in October. We met when we were 17 and were very much in love, He is the only boyfriend i have ever had until now. I have never been with anyone else but him, he is my first true love. he is now in the Air Force and before he left to training he told me non-stop he wants to get married right away and all these things, while in training he said many times he wants to get married he cant stand been away from me and if his training takes any longer that he would fly me down to his base and get married right away, then he said stories like i got you a ring (but he didnt) he kept asking for ring size over and over never bought a ring, said yes about me buying a wedding dress etc,, i visited him while he was in tech school and it was hard but when he came back from training in the end of September or October that he came back home he kept saying he loved me he wants to get married he even sat down with me in front of both his parents and grandmother and said that we are getting married by the end of the week etc.. we had planned to get married before his weeks were up by the end of october until he left to his first base up north. eventually he started saying i need to wait two weeks before we get married so i can get settled up there and know my way i dont know how things will be in the new base i wont even have a car etc.. I said okay, but his excuses began piling up. We stopped talking before he left to his base, and then i found out i was pregnant the first week or two of november. I had two previous abortions with this relationship, i told him he was supportive and said he loved me etc..i told him a child is not a reason to stay together i dont believe that is a reason to get married etc.. and he told me child or not whatever decision i decide that he wants to be with me. He said to me he wanted to get married and so on that he wants to fly me down and get married. Eventually he said i should have an abortion i cant keep it, he says my school will get ruined and how can i raise a child alone without both parents the child will get messed up etc. So i told him i didnt have money for an abortion so he sent me the money right away, he said he would be there for me in whatever i needed even though he is now based in a different state than i. I treated him bad and everything because i was overwhelmed and going through a really hard time. I went through the abortion alone, he did not call or text me what so ever not even to make sure i am okay. He called that saturday around 1 in the morning, he said he loved me that he is going crazy worried about me but since i treated him bad and that i said to him for him to leave me a alone he did but he still wants to be together and get married. After everything his words about marriage are just words. We stopped talking and then again we spoke yesterday, he is happy about work, he said to me he might get deployed in 4 months or so, without the care that we might not see each other again but that we might make it work,i cant sit around and wait i feel like he changes his story every min and i have to finish my bachelors. I love him a lot we have been through a lot but i am tired of been blamed for everything i am tired because he is not direct with me. He first tells me 2 weeks then he tels me a few months to get settled and then get married and move with him into base. He now then says he wants to fly me down to just spend time together, i told him i am not going to fly down every time he is lonely or needs company and meet up in some hotel and not see each other again after a few months and end up pregnant again like a joke. i wont do it it seems like a game to him. After almost 6 years i thought this was heading a serious path, i told him i want a serious relationship. It is so hard, everything here reminds me of him. I am done with his false promises, specially now that his circumstances are pushing us farther and farther away and he is okay with that. The story is longer but i dont want to bore you. How can i just get over this relationship? There is obviously nothing there anymore, we live in different states he is in the military ( which i ave always had strong feelings against the military but thats what he loves now, and that is his life now) He kept giving me the run around. How can i just move on, i have a huge exam coming up that defines my career and i cant concentrate my mind is full of him. i have no friends, no social life since he was all my life became surrounded of. how can i deal with this on my own? How do you get over a first love?
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