DannyT27 Posted November 24, 2011 Posted November 24, 2011 Ok woke up today absolutely devastated abt what's happened... Can't believe she left me I am now kicking myself for not showing her more affection etc... I could see she wasn't happy we was stuck in a rut, The thing is I love this girl with all my heart I thought we was solid. Ppl would look at us and think we was the perfect cpl lol, I knw it's my fault she left I was far to lazy we had a small 1 bed apartment all open so not much privacy... It's been a month tomorrow since she left me and now that I have hindsight ( sorry bad spelling ) I knw I could of prevented this. Thing is let's say she wanted to make another go of it in the future I couldn't because of afew factors basicly majority of my friends have slagged her off because she was with a new guy instantly saying she's sly etc... I would have trust issues, just can't see it happen tbh... I'm back at my mums and will be for a while as I have to save 10k for a deposit what do I do I feel lost/rejected/useless and pathetic... While she's out wit her new fella livin the dream wit no remorse for whats she's done... I honestly thought she lobed me. P.S she's started to drink alot and I'm worried for her dnt want her to become an alcholic!! Thanks
Author DannyT27 Posted November 24, 2011 Author Posted November 24, 2011 Just found out she's now deleted all my family on fb lol!
wilsonx Posted November 24, 2011 Posted November 24, 2011 You couldnt have prevented this. She chose her own path, you chose yours. You have to let go of that guilt. Usually people that drink hard or do drugs quickly after jumping relationships do so because they are guilty of something. Im just throwing that out there. If she jumped into a relationship that quick, there's the guilt factor for the drinking. The fact of the matter is "I need space" = always I want to try something else out for a bit (another person) anyone that says otherwise is lying or the other person did not work out and they did not want to admit the truth to themselves and their ex's. Anyone that's grounded and has heard this before knows exactly what "I need space" means. It boils down to she left you for someone else. Now your job is to find closure in this and dont blame this on yourself. You can say a lot of things. The best thing to yourself is "I do not want to be in a relationship with someone that does not want to be with me" This is the most positive reinforcement you can give yourself. It lays no blame on yourself and her. You actually have to realize is you dodged a bullet on this. She ran instead trying to fix something with the relationship. Imagine having kids and god forbid this happened then. Go read the marriage and separation forums, this same crap happens there all the time and it takes them years to overcome this obstacle
Author DannyT27 Posted November 24, 2011 Author Posted November 24, 2011 Thanks Wilson it hurts so much tho... The guy she's with is much older aswel... I knw I'm gonna have to move on jus gonna get bk to the gym. It's just such a shock, would you say this is a rebound ? I knw this sounds awful but I can't wait for it all to fall apart. Also I feel like I'll never meet anyone else and it's been a month already.. I just feel well and truely LOST without her. Cheers
wilsonx Posted November 24, 2011 Posted November 24, 2011 Thanks Wilson it hurts so much tho... The guy she's with is much older aswel... I knw I'm gonna have to move on jus gonna get bk to the gym. It's just such a shock, would you say this is a rebound ? I knw this sounds awful but I can't wait for it all to fall apart. Also I feel like I'll never meet anyone else and it's been a month already.. I just feel well and truely LOST without her. Cheers Here's the thing its not a rebound, its a new relationship, for someone to jump from a relationship for 5 years right into a new one believes in whats called "Grass is greener on the other side" They just take the jump over the fence and go and deal with the consequences later. She is going to rewrite history in her head about why the relationship really ended. Thats why these so called apology letters years later are pointless. They hold no real truth to them. You are better off in the long run. You do not want to rebound off this. Stay single go out and have fun and enjoy your life.
broken-and-lost Posted November 24, 2011 Posted November 24, 2011 it's sucks m8 i feel for you been there myself and i know it hurts to see her with some other guy but what wilson has said is on the money don't blame yourself she made a choice to run you make a choice to live your life well learn from what's happened never take things for granted no matter what your told but enjoy the things you have and live well good luck man
Author DannyT27 Posted November 24, 2011 Author Posted November 24, 2011 Hanks Wilson and broken, i am ok just gutted more than anything... Today she has deleted my family on fb and changed her fb to being in a relationship lol... I really hope it doesn't last, if you have read my previous threads you can see a pattern emerging... I find it upseting that I asked straight out when she finished if she had feelings for anyone else and she said absolutely not.. Just didn't think she was a bear faced liar I thought I new who she was. I can't help but thk this is very selfish... Good riddence!!
mike588 Posted November 24, 2011 Posted November 24, 2011 Ok woke up today absolutely devastated abt what's happened... Can't believe she left me I am now kicking myself for not showing her more affection etc... I could see she wasn't happy we was stuck in a rut, The thing is I love this girl with all my heart I thought we was solid. Ppl would look at us and think we was the perfect cpl lol, I knw it's my fault she left I was far to lazy we had a small 1 bed apartment all open so not much privacy... It's been a month tomorrow since she left me and now that I have hindsight ( sorry bad spelling ) I knw I could of prevented this. Thing is let's say she wanted to make another go of it in the future I couldn't because of afew factors basicly majority of my friends have slagged her off because she was with a new guy instantly saying she's sly etc... I would have trust issues, just can't see it happen tbh... I'm back at my mums and will be for a while as I have to save 10k for a deposit what do I do I feel lost/rejected/useless and pathetic... While she's out wit her new fella livin the dream wit no remorse for whats she's done... I honestly thought she lobed me. P.S she's started to drink alot and I'm worried for her dnt want her to become an alcholic!! Thanks Don't beat yourself up. I showered my ex. with attention and treated so well but she ended up going back to her ex. after a 1 year relationship with me. She mentioned to me many times that he wasn't giving her the attention she needed,, he was cold and distant but she gos back to him,,go figure. A commited partner looks for a solution an uncommited partner looks for an escape. Follow Wilsons advise.
Author DannyT27 Posted November 24, 2011 Author Posted November 24, 2011 I knw i have to move on and I will do... I just can't believe how cold hearted she been.... And I'm actually starting to think that she never really cared for me, I know that she thinks the grass on green and it might be.. Who knows ? Like Wilson said it's not a rebound and I have a gut feeling she gonna become pregnant by this dude which would be ridiculousas he has a 15 yo daughter already. I knw I venting but whatever happens I look at it this way " If she's happy then I'm happy " which sounds cheesey I knw but it's true.
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