I've came to the conclusion that I simply don't know how to make friends. ?

[OneFootOut]

Long ago, before I got married, I had an amazing group of friends. We would do anything for each other without expectations or asking anything in return. We simply looked out for each other, cared about each other, took care of each other, and had fun together. The group was male and female. We didn't cross the line of sex with each other, but were very close, in some cases closer than real siblings.

 

Not long into my marriage, my friends started drifting. My ex was a jerk to them, as he just didn't fit in with the group. Looking back, he was likely jealous of them. I gradually became more and more isolated and unavailable, and my friends did as well.

 

Within the marriage, we had no friends as a couple. He had friends he worked with, but we never socialized with anyone. It became a lonely existence. Just me, him, and the kids. Period.

 

When he and I split a couple years ago, there was no one there. There were no friends to turn to, no support group, no loving friend-family to turn to.

 

Ever since then, I have really been making an effort to befriend people. I try to speak to anyone, and always offer a smile and a hello. I just can't seem to make any friends. It seems like now a day’s people are only interested in you if you have something they want, and when they get it, they walk away.

 

I have a lot of very good "online friends" but they are too far to hang out with, or even meet in real life.

 

It's getting depressing to feel so alone all the time. I feel like a wolf without a pack, and it’s really effecting me emotionally and socially.

 

I've tried groups, and I don't attend church. I don't go to clubs or bars, and dating sites have proven to be a frustrating cruel joke

 

Is there such a thing as meeting and making real live 'good' friends these days?? Is there a trick to it or method? Everyone seems to be so guarded, or they have the attitude that they have all the friends they need, or act like they are feeling you out to see if you have anything they need. I'm so tired of being alone. I just don't know how to make friends anymore. Things aren't like they used to be. People aren't like they used to be.

[Ariadne]

Hi,

 

I don't think you can approach making friends like in a business.

 

You'll just end up being desperate.

 

Have you tried reconnecting with the old friends?

 

I think it's better to keep acquaintances that you really like for the long run.

 

When you are truly friends with someone years don't seem to have passed when you talk to them again.

 

Good luck reuniting with the old friends.