fotune_000 Posted November 24, 2011 Posted November 24, 2011 I don't know if I'm being jealous, disrespected, or seeing something that's not happening. I think my gf is looking at other guys but she denies it. Here's a situation from tonight: we were at the movies and at the end I notice her glancing behind her chair. As we leave I see a guy (with his gf) look at her while I'm behind her and then look away when he sees me looking at her. Her head was tilted in his direction as we left and when we turned a corner, he looked directly back at her, as he was holding his girlfriends hand. I couldn't believe it, but it seemed like my gf noticed and was more flattered than anything. When we were driving out we saw the same couple, and she looked in their direction. She's done iterations of this before, many times. I know she loves me and I don't suspect her of cheating. But it seems she just loves the attention and eye contact of random men, who aren't even attractive, which is the confusing part. Is she trying to make me jealous? Am I seeing something that's not there? Is she just disrespecting me and getting away with it? Any help?
Emilia Posted November 24, 2011 Posted November 24, 2011 She just loves attention from other men and doesn't care how that makes you feel. I'd struggle to respect someone like that
cdm369 Posted November 24, 2011 Posted November 24, 2011 Totally agree with emilla. At the very least very disrespectful and if she loves you right she wouldn't do that. Everyone notices a nice looking person but to look and look and look and stare. She likes the attention. This usually gets worse with time. All you can do is mention it or live with it.
Author fotune_000 Posted November 24, 2011 Author Posted November 24, 2011 She has redeeming qualities. She's intelligent, beautiful, and a good friend. But it's this that keeps cutting into those qualities. Considering that too, would you break up with her or try to talk to her about what I feel?
cdm369 Posted November 24, 2011 Posted November 24, 2011 Its always worth talking to her. You need to already have an idea of what you will accept and not accept as far as behavior goes and see what she says. If you both can't come out of the conversation satisfied then do what you have to do. You have to protect yourself.
verhrzn Posted November 24, 2011 Posted November 24, 2011 Here's a phrase to repeat to yourself: your girlfriend is monogamous, not dead. People notice attractive people; a quick glance, an appreciative mental "Hmm nice" and they're done. Can you honestly, truthfully say that you yourself have never let your eyes wander when a hot girl walks by? Or never been tempted? Here's the thing; if your girlfriend was blatantly checking out other guys (like staring at them, or catching their eye and smiling and waving) then I'd agree that she's being disrespectful and you should either talk to her about it or accept it. But from your post, a lot of what you're describing could be checking out, or even just innocently looking. Like, she had her head tilted in a guy's direction?? Dude... are you actually going to sit her down and tell her that whenever you guys go out in public, she's not allowed to even make occasional eye contact with other guys?
Author fotune_000 Posted November 24, 2011 Author Posted November 24, 2011 That's why I'm posting. It's been annoying me. Sometimes it feels like she does it to get me jealous on purpose. She knows the physical cues when something is disturbing me. When I don't give off those cues, it seems like she stops looking. But when I do, she's sort of encouraged. Thus, approaching her may encourage her to do it more?
Emilia Posted November 24, 2011 Posted November 24, 2011 That's why I'm posting. It's been annoying me. Sometimes it feels like she does it to get me jealous on purpose. She knows the physical cues when something is disturbing me. When I don't give off those cues, it seems like she stops looking. But when I do, she's sort of encouraged. Thus, approaching her may encourage her to do it more? How frequently do you have sex?
Author fotune_000 Posted November 24, 2011 Author Posted November 24, 2011 Whenever we're together really, unless one of us is really tired. What does that tell you?
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