Sugarkane Posted November 22, 2011 Posted November 22, 2011 You say that women find it harder to find someone to settle down after their mid thirties and blame them. But I think it's a catch 22. Then why do you spend your twenties seeing how much you can score? Mist guys in their twenties just want the chase. You only want us when you can't have us.
somedude81 Posted November 22, 2011 Posted November 22, 2011 You say that women find it harder to find someone to settle down after their mid thirties and blame them. But I think it's a catch 22. Then why do you spend your twenties seeing how much you can score? Mist guys in their twenties just want the chase. You only want us when you can't have us. Huh? Many guys in their 20's want a serious relationship. Most of the time they don't get it because the 20 something girls are too busy messing with players, or they aren't interested in dating at all/too picky.
Author Sugarkane Posted November 26, 2011 Author Posted November 26, 2011 More like thirties. Most guys party and date a different girl every 6 months in their twenties.
Author Sugarkane Posted November 26, 2011 Author Posted November 26, 2011 I still don't know many guys in their twenties willing to give up the partying lifestyle.
fortyninethousand322 Posted November 26, 2011 Posted November 26, 2011 More like thirties. Most guys party and date a different girl every 6 months in their twenties. :lmao: Are you serious? I'm lucky if I can get a date once a year, just a date, let alone getting a "relationship". I'm 23, from my perspective girls my age are either a) not interested in dating at all or b) pursuing men who aren't anything like me. Perhaps a little of both sometimes. I'm not ready for marriage (financially or personally) at this stage of my life, but I'm perfectly willing to meet someone, date them, and move in that direction. I'm most certainly not dating around, scoring, or partying heavily. That much I can assure you. Honestly, I think most people of both genders want what they can't have. Women aren't interested in me, because well, they're just not into me. Perhaps when I get to be 35 I won't be interested in them. It all comes out in the wash I suppose.
Lonely Ronin Posted November 26, 2011 Posted November 26, 2011 You say that women find it harder to find someone to settle down after their mid thirties and blame them. But I think it's a catch 22. Then why do you spend your twenties seeing how much you can score? Mist guys in their twenties just want the chase. You only want us when you can't have us. Tip: take everything you read on this forum with a grain of salt. Personally I break this stigma, because I spent most of my 20's in a long term relationship (7+) years. IMO a lot of guys spend their 20's trying to prove how manly they can be to other men. IN other words, they are always trying to best their friends.
counterman Posted November 26, 2011 Posted November 26, 2011 I'm in my 20s and I wouldn't say that's the general consensus. I do know a lot of people in their 20s who love to party and are not looking for a commitment but I also know many others who are looking for relationships. As for myself, I don't party that much. I really don't enjoy that environment and culture. I would love to be in relationship, not just any though, one with a girl I am attracted to and get along really well with. Unfortunately, most of the girls I meet are ones that love to mess with the players/douchebags, which is something I am not at all. They say they want a great guy, but even when one is staring right in front of them, they will always steer towards the douchebags. This is where I agree with Somedude. Not saying that there are girls who don't want relationships, just saying most of the ones I am attracted to aren't looking for what I'm looking for. I'll keep approaching and dating girls here and there but I am honestly not hoping for much. Just from the environment I'm in and the girls I have met, it's looking unlikely that I'll meet a girl that has the same mindset as me, who I'm attracted to. So I tend to put in more effort where I see rewards, such as my career.
Author Sugarkane Posted November 26, 2011 Author Posted November 26, 2011 I I'll keep approaching and dating girls here and there but I am honestly not hoping for much. Just from the environment I'm in and the girls I have met, it's looking unlikely that I'll meet a girl that has the same mindset as me, who I'm attracted to. So I tend to put in more effort where I see rewards, such as my career. I can totally relate too. At least your career doesn't string you along or lie and cheat and betray you.It just annoys me all these threads "why do women want children in their 40s? " threads. It's easy for people to day settle down when your young. Doesn't work out that way though.
USCGAviator Posted November 26, 2011 Posted November 26, 2011 I spent my entire 20's living the married life. Now I'm 31 and more or less scared to get involved again so soon. At least I've been getting good at keeping a good standing with most rather than burning bridges.
JohnP82 Posted November 26, 2011 Posted November 26, 2011 Depends on the guy. Some want a different girl every other week and others just want one. I wanted the one I had, but now I just want to take a break from relationships.
Andy_K Posted November 26, 2011 Posted November 26, 2011 More like thirties. Most guys party and date a different girl every 6 months in their twenties. Yukon is right you know. Marriage is common in the twenties. Average age of first marriage is around 30 (for the UK), and given the demograhic that means a LOT of marriages in the twenties. Compare the population of a typical city with the capacity of all it's nightclubs, and you'll quickly figure out that only a small percentage of the twentysomething's (of either gender) are actually out on a given weekend. They're just the most socially active ones that you're more likely to encounter. The reality is the the average number of lifetime sexual partners is still in single figures. That's a long way from a new girl every six months. If you don't know any guys who fit into that category, it's because the guys you know are not as typical as you think they are.
grkBoy Posted November 26, 2011 Posted November 26, 2011 You say that women find it harder to find someone to settle down after their mid thirties and blame them. But I think it's a catch 22. Then why do you spend your twenties seeing how much you can score? Mist guys in their twenties just want the chase. You only want us when you can't have us. I dunno. I tend to believe that in our 20s, too many men and women are not interested in "serious". So you have many simply chasing "hot things" and sleeping with them. This creates the image of women only chasing playas/bad boys and men only chasing "hot young sluts". At the same time, there are then all the "nice" people who can't seem to get anywhere and thus they spend their 20s alone and having problems socially. Now we're in our 30s, and the dynamic changes. The women who were getting laid in their 20s are now seeking husbands, and hope the playas/bad boys will "grow up" and settle down. Unfortunately, the playas/bad boys simply have decided that commitment is bogus, or they want to wait til they are near 40 to do that. So they start pursuing younger women. On top of that, a handful of these women ended up knocked up. The "nice" people still are alone, and now bitter. Many men in this case now see their options as "sloppy seconds" or "damaged goods". The "nice girls" either are still seen as invisible or they too are believing they deserve some amazing man as payment for their suffering in their 20s. Some "blossom" into "hot women" and now want to live it up. So as we get older, we have all those bitter nice guys now wondering if they even want marriage because they believe all those "sloppy seconds" simply want a meal ticket. On top of that you have all the playas/bad boys banging women 7-10 years younger than them, dealing with their drama, and simply refusing to "grow up". Many have also decided marriage is bogus and they'll never do it. At the same time, you then have loads of women wondering where all the marrying men are. Some will pick and choose from the "nice guys" who aren't totally ugly. It helps if the girl doesn't have her own red flags. Many others have a few more bad experiences and thus now decide they'll happily die alone if they don't get a handsome alpha male husband. And the cycle continues...as you see in many postings here.
aj22one Posted November 26, 2011 Posted November 26, 2011 I dunno. I tend to believe that in our 20s, too many men and women are not interested in "serious". So you have many simply chasing "hot things" and sleeping with them. This creates the image of women only chasing playas/bad boys and men only chasing "hot young sluts". At the same time, there are then all the "nice" people who can't seem to get anywhere and thus they spend their 20s alone and having problems socially. Now we're in our 30s, and the dynamic changes. The women who were getting laid in their 20s are now seeking husbands, and hope the playas/bad boys will "grow up" and settle down. Unfortunately, the playas/bad boys simply have decided that commitment is bogus, or they want to wait til they are near 40 to do that. So they start pursuing younger women. On top of that, a handful of these women ended up knocked up. The "nice" people still are alone, and now bitter. Many men in this case now see their options as "sloppy seconds" or "damaged goods". The "nice girls" either are still seen as invisible or they too are believing they deserve some amazing man as payment for their suffering in their 20s. Some "blossom" into "hot women" and now want to live it up. So as we get older, we have all those bitter nice guys now wondering if they even want marriage because they believe all those "sloppy seconds" simply want a meal ticket. On top of that you have all the playas/bad boys banging women 7-10 years younger than them, dealing with their drama, and simply refusing to "grow up". Many have also decided marriage is bogus and they'll never do it. At the same time, you then have loads of women wondering where all the marrying men are. Some will pick and choose from the "nice guys" who aren't totally ugly. It helps if the girl doesn't have her own red flags. Many others have a few more bad experiences and thus now decide they'll happily die alone if they don't get a handsome alpha male husband. And the cycle continues...as you see in many postings here. Damn, dude. You hit that right on the head right there. Very wise man.
Author Sugarkane Posted November 27, 2011 Author Posted November 27, 2011 How do you know this? Could it be that most guys that you knew when you were in your 20s were this way? Just from my own experience.
Author Sugarkane Posted November 27, 2011 Author Posted November 27, 2011 I wish all the genuine people looking for love, could all just meet in one room or something. That would make life a bit easier.
carhill Posted November 27, 2011 Posted November 27, 2011 Then why do you spend your twenties seeing how much you can score? I spent my twenties looking for a marital partner. Looked in all the wrong places. That's life.
Woggle Posted November 27, 2011 Posted November 27, 2011 I dunno. I tend to believe that in our 20s, too many men and women are not interested in "serious". So you have many simply chasing "hot things" and sleeping with them. This creates the image of women only chasing playas/bad boys and men only chasing "hot young sluts". At the same time, there are then all the "nice" people who can't seem to get anywhere and thus they spend their 20s alone and having problems socially. Now we're in our 30s, and the dynamic changes. The women who were getting laid in their 20s are now seeking husbands, and hope the playas/bad boys will "grow up" and settle down. Unfortunately, the playas/bad boys simply have decided that commitment is bogus, or they want to wait til they are near 40 to do that. So they start pursuing younger women. On top of that, a handful of these women ended up knocked up. The "nice" people still are alone, and now bitter. Many men in this case now see their options as "sloppy seconds" or "damaged goods". The "nice girls" either are still seen as invisible or they too are believing they deserve some amazing man as payment for their suffering in their 20s. Some "blossom" into "hot women" and now want to live it up. So as we get older, we have all those bitter nice guys now wondering if they even want marriage because they believe all those "sloppy seconds" simply want a meal ticket. On top of that you have all the playas/bad boys banging women 7-10 years younger than them, dealing with their drama, and simply refusing to "grow up". Many have also decided marriage is bogus and they'll never do it. At the same time, you then have loads of women wondering where all the marrying men are. Some will pick and choose from the "nice guys" who aren't totally ugly. It helps if the girl doesn't have her own red flags. Many others have a few more bad experiences and thus now decide they'll happily die alone if they don't get a handsome alpha male husband. And the cycle continues...as you see in many postings here. This says it all in a nutshell.
Wolf18 Posted November 27, 2011 Posted November 27, 2011 Men in their 20's are getting a new girl every 6 months? Maybe like 2% of us. But otherwise, I'm 22 and haven't seen a vagina in 6 months, and to be quite honest I don't see this changing at all in the next 6 months either. I think I've had sex maybe 3-4 times since I got out of HS. Even my best friend who is 25 tall, good looking , has a decent job, all the things you want, only gets 1 girlfriend a year. My other friend who is a bodybuilder with good looks as well is 23 yet has been with his girlfriend for 6 years. It's mostly TV and a minority of the best looking most popular men who give the impression that guys in their 20's are always scoring. Sometimes I wonder if this is true, and start to think that I'm really going to regret how my 20's are playing out.
musemaj11 Posted November 27, 2011 Posted November 27, 2011 (edited) Life is too short to **** only one woman and spend all your hard-earned money on only one woman. A smart man tries to have sex with as many women as he can get and he can afford during his life. Edited November 27, 2011 by musemaj11
laotzu Posted November 27, 2011 Posted November 27, 2011 Kind of cuts both ways from a lot of different perspectives. I spent most of my twenties in a relationship with one person, and I planned on hoping to find someone to marry when I was in that age range. Now, at twenty nine and out of a long, failed relationship in which the other person cheated on me, I'm dating around like I never did in my twenties. This is the first time in my life when I've ever slept with two people in the same week (really, within the same forty eight hours) which is something I'd never have wanted to do previously. Ideally I'd still like a long term relationship, but if you're thirty-something and girls are willing to sleep with you after three dates... you can't exactly reject that.
laotzu Posted November 27, 2011 Posted November 27, 2011 Sometimes I wonder if this is true, and start to think that I'm really going to regret how my 20's are playing out. To be honest with you - you really will regret it. My advice is to really focus on trying to get girls and build confidence in your early twenties. Online dating, friend net-working, and approaching girls who show interest. 10% of the time something will come of it, and when you hit 30, you won't be one of those random guys trolling dating advice websites complaining about how they never get girls and how all girls are terrible. Girls aren't any more terrible than guys, but reading the male perspective on LS is pretty disconcerting. Chase tail hard when you're young, and it'll be more likely to eventually chase you back.
Wolf18 Posted November 27, 2011 Posted November 27, 2011 To be honest with you - you really will regret it. My advice is to really focus on trying to get girls and build confidence in your early twenties. Online dating, friend net-working, and approaching girls who show interest. 10% of the time something will come of it, and when you hit 30, you won't be one of those random guys trolling dating advice websites complaining about how they never get girls and how all girls are terrible. Girls aren't any more terrible than guys, but reading the male perspective on LS is pretty disconcerting. Chase tail hard when you're young, and it'll be more likely to eventually chase you back. Ha, appreciate the advice, but I got to say man it's tough. My friend network isn't huge, and my friends don't know many girls. Even two females I know very well and was very close with didn't know any other women Online dating for a guy like me would be about as efficient as two old people f*cking. I wouldn't suggest any man use online dating, if you are good enough for women that you will succeed in Online dating, you will probably succeed a lot more in real life dating. I'll approach women here and there, but it's always half -assed and I'm not really trying. I've found that whether I try or not , the outcome is pretty much about luck. I plan on moving to a different country that I've visited before in maybe 3-4 years, where I prefer the life as it is rural. The women in other countries seem to be far more attracted to me and more affectionate and warm than girls where I live now. Hopefully when I get there I'll be able to live out all the experiences that every day guys aren't allowed to have in ****holes like NYC.
Feelsgoodman Posted November 27, 2011 Posted November 27, 2011 You say that women find it harder to find someone to settle down after their mid thirties and blame them. But I think it's a catch 22. Then why do you spend your twenties seeing how much you can score? Mist guys in their twenties just want the chase. You only want us when you can't have us. You are just buying into popular anti-male stereotypes. Sure some men spend their 20s "seeing ho much they can score", but most do not. Personally, now that I'm in my early 30s, I am a lot less interested in long-term relationships than I was back in my 20s (I was a lot more naive back then...)
Feelsgoodman Posted November 27, 2011 Posted November 27, 2011 I plan on moving to a different country that I've visited before in maybe 3-4 years, where I prefer the life as it is rural. The women in other countries seem to be far more attracted to me and more affectionate and warm than girls where I live now. Hopefully when I get there I'll be able to live out all the experiences that every day guys aren't allowed to have in ****holes like NYC. Which country is that?
refurb Posted November 28, 2011 Posted November 28, 2011 How do you know this? Could it be that most guys that you knew when you were in your 20s were this way? There is some truth to this. When I was in my 20s, I would have loved to find a nice girl to settle down with. However, most women I dated weren't interested in that. Now that I'm in my 30s, suddenly I've become a lot more interesting to women (who I imagine can't block out the sound of their biological clocks). I'm enjoying dating and I'm much more selective about who I get into a relationship with. Not because my physical standards have increased, but because I'm much better at identifying red flags now. Off topic, but it amazes me how many people (not just women) have serious emotional baggage that they do everything possible to avoid dealing with. They just keep going through life like it doesn't exist. RF
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