chelle21689 Posted November 22, 2011 Posted November 22, 2011 I was in a relationship for 5 1/2 years when I was 16. I was really clingy, I did anything for him, and I put himself first. I kinda got screwed over for being too nice and looking back I was naive about relationships thinking there were soul mates and that fairy tale happy love...but since the break up I had a very different perspective on relationships from then on. I don't know if I'll ever meet someone I'm insane about like I was bout my ex. I like my boyfriend a lot, he makes my life better, but I don't think I'm crazy about him. I don't know if I could ever be crazy about anyone the same way ever. I feel like I kinda put myself first now...rather than someone else. Is it normal to be this way after your first love?
WhiteChocolate Posted November 22, 2011 Posted November 22, 2011 I think it is part of growing up. Personally, my ideal relationship would be one in which we put "us" first, then I put myself first, and he puts himself first. "Us" doesn't mean each other. If I have a personal problem, I wouldn't expect him to solve it; and if he has a problem, I'm certainly not going to fix it for him. I'd be willing to help, of course, but in the end it is his problem. However, I would expect support from him, and he can expect the same from me. So even if I don't fix the problem for him, he can rely on me to be on his side and be comforting after a long day. At least that is my take. Hopefully I didn't go off topic.
Author chelle21689 Posted November 23, 2011 Author Posted November 23, 2011 No, you didn't go off topic. Good answer and it made me think about it. At least you answered, I didn't get very much answers as I thought hehe. I think we both put effort into our relationship and that I think about him with my decisions/actions. I'm not really putting myself "first" I guess, but I think I make it important that I am a priority and not just #5 on the list.
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