Lobouspo Posted November 22, 2011 Posted November 22, 2011 This year has been a tough on the dating front. Aside from the usual flakes and liars, I briefly dated a girl I knew for sometime and things did not work out. I really find myself becoming jaded over women and the whole dating meatgrinder. I dont want to get this way as I can see how it could sabotage future relationships with potential. Anyone ever felt the same and taken a break from dating and focus on other things? Was it beneficial? Any thoughts or input would be appreciated
norajane Posted November 22, 2011 Posted November 22, 2011 I've taken lots of breaks from dating throughout the years. Especially after a break-up...you need time to deal with all the issues and feelings and regain perspective on yourself and your life. It also helps to maintain balance, and a clear head. There are many important things in life, and focusing mostly on dating in your free time puts all this pressure on you and makes you lose perspective. When you give yourself a chance to relax and live your life, you become a more interesting and enjoyable person as well as being able to look at dating prospects differently. You aren't just bouncing from one person to another. You can take the time to find out what is important to you in a partner.
grkBoy Posted November 22, 2011 Posted November 22, 2011 When one takes a break, they need to do it with the right mentality and for the right reasons. Most people I see who take a break claim they're simply taking a break to find clarity, but in reality they're more hoping playing the "I don't care" mentality or "when you're not looking" mentality will find them someone. Doesn't work that way. Some will set themselves up with a FB or FWB and think that's all they need, but over time the hormones building up from that sex still make them deeply wanting to have a RL. When I took a break, I went all the way. I didn't try to meet new women or date. I didn't worry if I didn't have anyone. I tried to avoid "couple-centric" affairs and holidays, but I really just decided to make my life about me. I didn't worry about not getting any sex or anything. The "clarity" hits when you're waking up every day and not thinking or worrying about finding love. When you truly just don't care if you're alone or not. When you enjoy life and enjoy who you are despite that you're alone. That to me is the goal.
Cee Posted November 22, 2011 Posted November 22, 2011 I took several breaks from dating. It helped me regain my self-esteem and my perspective that landing a man isn't everything. Sometimes it's nice to focus on exercise, friends, and hobbies instead of dinner dates that seem to lead nowhere. I've known people who took breaks for too long (years and years). It seemed like they were running from taking a risk.
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