ShannonMI Posted November 23, 2011 Posted November 23, 2011 :lmao::lmao: Hahahahahaha I was trying to think of the most ridiculous sexual description. I was cracking up when I typed that out. Seriously though that's how a lot of those romance novel sex scenes are. F*cking dumb and not sexy at all.
Els Posted November 23, 2011 Posted November 23, 2011 To quote (supposedly) Stephen King: Harry Potter is all about confronting fears, finding inner strength and doing what is best in the face of adversity. Twilight is.. about how important it is to have a boyfriend. I've not read the book, but TBH the synopsis had me pretty much convinced that I'd be rewarded with an uncreative, cliched plot and shallow characterizations, if I ever tried.
norajane Posted November 23, 2011 Posted November 23, 2011 I'm actually thinking of creating some kind of formulaic tripe for a mass audience because I am very lazy and tired of doing real work for a living. This is why I ask and one reason I made the thread. Yes! I am planning on writing a trite, formulaic Christmas movie. I've just about got the formula down: - stressed out, uptight career girl (or guy) from a big city finds herself stranded in a small town (could be a small mountain town, but always a town where they cut down their own Christmas trees) - big city girl (or guy) does not believe in Santa, Christmas, or the inherent goodness of small towns - big city girl meets an attractive, charming, small town guy. Guy is usually the police chief, runs the town newspaper, doctor, lawyer or other professional - often someone who has moved from a big city to the small town - small town guy has a charming dog or impish child (due to being a widower, of course) - big city girl struggles to endure the small town ways, and small town Christmas way of the small town - with the help of the attractive, charming yet suitably professional small town guy, his charming dog and/or impish child, the stressed out, uptight career girl learns to love the small town guy and discovers the true meaning of Christmas that can only be found in small towns. This can also work in reverse, where the small town guy (or girl) end up stranded in the big city for Christmas and bring the small town Christmasy goodness to the uptight city girl (or guy). In that case, the (widowed) uptight city girl might have an impishly adorable child, or dog. Most often, it's a child, because you have to fit Santa in there and the child asking for a dad for Christmas. Good luck with your writing!
Star Gazer Posted November 23, 2011 Posted November 23, 2011 Anyone here watch True Blood? Those are some sexy vampires and werewolves for sure. F*ck Twilight. Alcide!!! Eric!!! Bella is a HORRIBLE role model for young women, but I do find the Twilight series of movies fascinating and entertaining.
Els Posted November 23, 2011 Posted November 23, 2011 ROFL norajane, I know! It's sad that marketing has dominated pretty much every profession in the world, more so than actual talent and creativity. But it's the inevitable way of the world, I guess. So is Star Wars:rolleyes: What's wrong with Star Wars?
ShannonMI Posted November 23, 2011 Posted November 23, 2011 Alcide!!! Eric!!! Bella is a HORRIBLE role model for young women, but I do find the Twilight series of movies fascinating and entertaining. Ahhhhhh yes Alcide is a panty creamer for sure. :love:He is my favorite character. Not so much because of who he is on the show, but because he is a beautiful speciman of a man. Eric comes in at a close second.
ShannonMI Posted November 23, 2011 Posted November 23, 2011 Do I need I need to work out more or something? Don't get me wrong, I love Eric. He has a killer body too, but Alcide is has the body of a God. He is such perfection I can barely watch the show without salivating. I usually need a bib.
ShannonMI Posted November 23, 2011 Posted November 23, 2011 And for the record I love Eric's CHARACTER more then Alcide's, but sorry, Alcide's body takes the cake. Speaking of cake....I'd like to eat it off his abs. Delicious!!!!!:love:
ShannonMI Posted November 23, 2011 Posted November 23, 2011 Thank you:love: Don't mind me....I'm Eric of LS that is currently fantasizing that you're all talking about me:lmao: It's kinda fun...and twisted...... I wish you were blood sucking Eric. That would be hot. I actually wish vampires were real. As f*cked up as that is. I'd be a fang banger for sure;)
ShannonMI Posted November 23, 2011 Posted November 23, 2011 How are you on Beer guts, yellow teeth, aging skin due to smoking tons of weed and a flat ass? If you're into that...we should get together sometime:D Yikes a flat ass? No can do cowboy. Sorry:lmao:
tigressA Posted November 23, 2011 Posted November 23, 2011 F*ck Twilight. Twilight sucks. Like SG said, Bella is an atrocious role model. She's so bland, she doesn't do anything--she isn't special in any way at all, yet these two supernaturally powerful guys are crazy in love with her and fight over her? Bulls*it. :rolleyes: That's why it's such a huge hit. It feeds the "I'm special, I'm a princess" delusions that so many girls and women have. They feel they don't need to distinguish themselves in any way to get what they want. It's not compelling at all because the dynamic between helpless, hapless Bella and supernaturally powerful Edward & Jacob is so incredibly uneven. At least with Buffy, she was the Slayer--her life was about defeating evil, killing vampires and demons, and she fell in love with two of them. That was complex and entertaining. And Spike was hot as f*ck. Not to mention--SPARKLING in the sun?! WTF? Vampires do not sparkle in the sun. They burst into flames.
Woggle Posted November 23, 2011 Posted November 23, 2011 He actually sparkles? I laughed when I read that. He guys if you want to get a date go buy some glitter.
KR10N Posted November 23, 2011 Posted November 23, 2011 Just watched one of these as they are spammed constanly on cable now. Was not impressed. Where's the appeal ladies? Why do you like or dislike Twilight? Should we men start acting like soulful monsters to attract you?Good heavens, no! I hate Twilight w/ a fiery passion that consumes my soul! Real men don't sparkle. Real men look like this. Oops, wrong picture. I meant this!
Star Gazer Posted November 23, 2011 Posted November 23, 2011 F*ck Twilight. Twilight sucks. Like SG said, Bella is an atrocious role model. She's so bland, she doesn't do anything--she isn't special in any way at all, yet these two supernaturally powerful guys are crazy in love with her and fight over her? Bulls*it. :rolleyes: Hmph. Being "bland" has absolutely nothing to do with why I think she's a poor role model. Isn't it obvious? She bends over backwards to please the object of her affection - whether that's allowing him to destroy her property, physically restrain her, or even physically abuse/sexually assault her. She tried to commit suicide over him. She's also obviously attracted to and chases after the most obviously dangerous male around her.
Author dasein Posted November 23, 2011 Author Posted November 23, 2011 He actually sparkles? I laughed when I read that. He guys if you want to get a date go buy some glitter. ...or some PCP for your date's drink. Tigress wins the thread so far for best anti Twilight rant, norajane gets best mass bestseller idea, tc gets best Byron reference ("TITAN!"), shannon gets best/worst description of the sex act, everyone else gets honorable mention for general good humor.
tigressA Posted November 23, 2011 Posted November 23, 2011 Hmph. Being "bland" has absolutely nothing to do with why I think she's a poor role model. Isn't it obvious? She bends over backwards to please the object of her affection - whether that's allowing him to destroy her property, physically restrain her, or even physically abuse/sexually assault her. She tried to commit suicide over him. She's also obviously attracted to and chases after the most obviously dangerous male around her. Hm, I didn't know about that. I hadn't read the books or seen the movies, I had heard a lot about her 'blandness' as a character so that's what I commented on. What you described is... You could, though, say that her behavior over Edward was in part driven by her having no life. She basically made this guy the center of her world because she had nothing else.
Star Gazer Posted November 23, 2011 Posted November 23, 2011 Hm, I didn't know about that. I hadn't read the books or seen the movies, I had heard a lot about her 'blandness' as a character so that's what I commented on. What you described is... You could, though, say that her behavior over Edward was in part driven by her having no life. She basically made this guy the center of her world because she had nothing else. So... your opinion is based on... what, exactly? I mean, I'm no Bella fan, but it seems honestly ridiculous to have an opinion about a series of books and movies that you have neither read nor watched. It's like most guys' rants about SATC... Again, I'm not a Bella fan, but she's quite complex at the end of the day. I don't find complex people bland.
verhrzn Posted November 23, 2011 Posted November 23, 2011 Me, I despise Twilight, but oh how cathartic it is to laugh at it. There a couple of recaps around the Internet filled with snarky rage, but Cleolinda still takes the cake (she's my favorite Twilight commentator, as you can tell.) For example, from her Twilight Glossary page (http://cleoland.pbworks.com/w/page/10373763/Twilight): Beige Edward Cullen's favorite color, certainly in terms of clothing. I can respect that Stephenie Meyer (as I read her say somewhere) wanted to go in the opposite direction from the clichéd gothy-dark fashions vampires usually appear in. It's just... also... kind of hilarious. Edward starts forcing Cokes and ravioli and beige leather jackets on Bella because he's afraid she's going to go into shock (he knows this because of his medical learnings), and if the Lonnie incident didn't send her, the imminent Conversation of Vampire Revelation will. (Midnight Sun recap) Bella gets dressed in Alice's giant closet and Edward puts on the beigest clothes he can lay hands on, naturally, and they go to see Renesmee. (Breaking Dawn recap) life_on_queen says: "Uh, the media training I went to was pretty much - wear navy blue or black when you want to be taken seriously, tan or beige means 'love me, touch me.'" Permit me to note here that [...] in the books, Edward Cullen is ALWAYS wearing beige. (Poor confused, sex-starved, mixed-signaled Bella. "Your mouth says no, but your beige says UNF.") (Entry)
Author dasein Posted November 23, 2011 Author Posted November 23, 2011 Well the Bella character IS pretty damn bland in the first movie IMO, but that's the extent of my experience of Twilight. I kept thinking, "yeah I'd do her but bet she would just lay there."
Wolf18 Posted November 23, 2011 Posted November 23, 2011 The person who wrote the Twilight books has nothing to offer the world, but is a brilliant business woman. What better way to make lots of money than to write a book specifically aimed at a really stupid demographic? (tween and teen girls). What's sad however is when you see the line for twilight at the movie theater and half the people there are childless women in their 20's and 30's
Author dasein Posted November 23, 2011 Author Posted November 23, 2011 The person who wrote the Twilight books has nothing to offer the world, but is a brilliant business woman. What better way to make lots of money than to write a book specifically aimed at a really stupid demographic? (tween and teen girls). What's sad however is when you see the line for twilight at the movie theater and half the people there are childless women in their 20's and 30's See that's what I'm thinking. If poorly written, manipulative formula dreck is all it takes to make bank, I can do that all day long. It's a gravy train I'd very much like to ride, just have to iron out the sources of the appeal and the mass market buttons that need pushing.
Wolf18 Posted November 23, 2011 Posted November 23, 2011 See that's what I'm thinking. If poorly written, manipulative formula dreck is all it takes to make bank, I can do that all day long. It's a gravy train I'd very much like to ride, just have to iron out the sources of the appeal and the mass market buttons that need pushing. This is why capitalism blows and contrary to popular belief, causes great cultural and national stagnation. Women these days are making more money than men, so everything from literature, movies to commercials and TV shows are geared towards this consumer demographic. Product?: Dancing with the Stars, Jersey Shore, vampire novels, Romantic comedies, Lady Gaga, Nickelback, commercials that have sassy women running laps around borderline retarded Homer Simpson men, etc.
Chubbi Posted November 23, 2011 Posted November 23, 2011 It's not just one man in love with Bella. It's TWO men: how could you forget my sexy werewolf Jacob Black. True Blood is the same way: 2 men in love with Snookie. 2 hot men: Eric and her husband. Any romance book that wants to catch women will just play on the fantasy of having not one, but 2 great guys chasing a very plain average girl. It's a best seller instantly.
Disenchantedly Yours Posted November 23, 2011 Posted November 23, 2011 Never had an interest in reading the books. Saw the first movie and thought it was terrible. If I want to see a love story, give me something like Out of Africa..with a real man and a real woman in it. Not kids. I think all the leads are beautiful (I don't consider the female lead plain at all) but the whole thing never spoke to me. I think for the most part, while there are older ladies into Twilight, I think it's mostly a teen thing.
ShannonMI Posted November 23, 2011 Posted November 23, 2011 Nothing wrong with that. I'm a guy 37 years old and while I don't hold Twilight at the top of my all time movie favs....I cannot wait to see what happens in part 4. For me it's a rainy day "something to watch" movie.... I've seen them all so far. It's also good for some laughs... the way Bella got an old dirtbike fo rJacob to fix merely so she could live in the danger zone to get a glimpse of Edward lmao.. Jacob rebuilt a totally destroyed bike in like three days....lmao.... funny. I could spoil it for you so you don't have to go spend the money and sit through it. Being a guy I would assume you don't really want to. Or maybe I'm wrong;)
Recommended Posts