chados Posted November 22, 2011 Posted November 22, 2011 so my ex agreed to a meetup, sounded happy about it. im not going to ask her anything about the relationship, im gonna act happy and confident, but i wanna be prepared you know. i've never had this chance before with a ex, cause normally i don't want to get back with them. anyone with experience? what should i talk about to keep the conversation alive? im not planning on a 2 hours conversation, 1hour at the most.
jordjones Posted November 22, 2011 Posted November 22, 2011 I'm in the exact same position, as you know. Here's my plan at the moment: - Will meet her for quick coffee, then walk across street for drinks, then go to local park to chat. I want us to be moving and drinking at multiple locations, though I only plan to be with her for about 2 hours or so. I'm bringing small bottles of alcohol to put in cokes at the park...something a little risque... - I have a few things prepared that I think she will find interesting/funny that I will insert into conversation when appropriate. - I'm just there to sit back and have a good time. I have no expectations, but will escalate touching (keno) gradually, particularly as the alcohol goes up. I don't plan on kissing her, but kind of have the idea that if the opportunity comes, what the hell. - I will not plan any future meeting on this particular date. Just a few points I've written down.
Author chados Posted November 22, 2011 Author Posted November 22, 2011 I'm in the exact same position, as you know. Here's my plan at the moment: - Will meet her for quick coffee, then walk across street for drinks, then go to local park to chat. I want us to be moving and drinking at multiple locations, though I only plan to be with her for about 2 hours or so. I'm bringing small bottles of alcohol to put in cokes at the park...something a little risque... - I have a few things prepared that I think she will find interesting/funny that I will insert into conversation when appropriate. - I'm just there to sit back and have a good time. I have no expectations, but will escalate touching (keno) gradually, particularly as the alcohol goes up. I don't plan on kissing her, but kind of have the idea that if the opportunity comes, what the hell. - I will not plan any future meeting on this particular date. Just a few points I've written down. sounds fair, remember the update, when are you going out:)?
leoc1973 Posted November 23, 2011 Posted November 23, 2011 hey guys some advice from a guy who has been there and done that and screwed up. I went in with the intentions of having a good time keeping it light and all the textbook stuff. It was a month after the breakup and we went to dinner. It never and I mean never goes the way you have it in your head. We had so much fun we went to dinner did some really happy reminiscing and when I tried to give her a hug and kiss on the cheek she said where ya going can we talk for a bit. So we sat in the car and she started crying her eyes out told me the love of my life stuff and all that. Well here is where I was at the fork in the road... What I should have done is hug her tell her I care about her but I gotta go smile and drop her off and drive away without looking back. She probably would have gone in the house and started doubting what she did(broke up with me) and maybe even thought she was losing me cause I was stronger than she thought I would be. She might have even called and asked for me back. What I did was see her cry and how much she was hurting and all I wanted to do is take her pain away so I told her I loved her I would always love her she was the love of my life and all the other stupid stuff guys do because we just want them back and want them to stop crying. Well her eyes dried up faster than the desert at noon. She told me nope I cant we don't belong together and it left me the one crying and pleading. So so stupid!! ugh. Advice: Be prepared for them to cry. They will! BE STRONG dont crack. You might think well my relationship is different and I don't wanna play games but if she knows how much you are hurting she will damn well take her time on figuring out what she wants to do with you while she is dating other guys and having the time of her life you will be home on this forum asking for advice and crying yourself to sleep! You might think no she is different but she isn't that is where the women that are "confused" comes in they love you and wanna be with you but don't think you will change or whatever. You have to make it so they don't care if you change or you guys just don't work. Make it so losing you is all they care about avoiding. Already know inyour head that you are going to be a little cold to her she has to think she is losing you or she won't come back. Trust me and about 10,000 other guys/gals on this site that have already screwed up their second chances.
Author chados Posted November 23, 2011 Author Posted November 23, 2011 hey guys some advice from a guy who has been there and done that and screwed up. I went in with the intentions of having a good time keeping it light and all the textbook stuff. It was a month after the breakup and we went to dinner. It never and I mean never goes the way you have it in your head. We had so much fun we went to dinner did some really happy reminiscing and when I tried to give her a hug and kiss on the cheek she said where ya going can we talk for a bit. So we sat in the car and she started crying her eyes out told me the love of my life stuff and all that. Well here is where I was at the fork in the road... What I should have done is hug her tell her I care about her but I gotta go smile and drop her off and drive away without looking back. She probably would have gone in the house and started doubting what she did(broke up with me) and maybe even thought she was losing me cause I was stronger than she thought I would be. She might have even called and asked for me back. What I did was see her cry and how much she was hurting and all I wanted to do is take her pain away so I told her I loved her I would always love her she was the love of my life and all the other stupid stuff guys do because we just want them back and want them to stop crying. Well her eyes dried up faster than the desert at noon. She told me nope I cant we don't belong together and it left me the one crying and pleading. So so stupid!! ugh. Advice: Be prepared for them to cry. They will! BE STRONG dont crack. You might think well my relationship is different and I don't wanna play games but if she knows how much you are hurting she will damn well take her time on figuring out what she wants to do with you while she is dating other guys and having the time of her life you will be home on this forum asking for advice and crying yourself to sleep! You might think no she is different but she isn't that is where the women that are "confused" comes in they love you and wanna be with you but don't think you will change or whatever. You have to make it so they don't care if you change or you guys just don't work. Make it so losing you is all they care about avoiding. Already know inyour head that you are going to be a little cold to her she has to think she is losing you or she won't come back. Trust me and about 10,000 other guys/gals on this site that have already screwed up their second chances. thanks for the reply, it was a great post. i think im doing great right now. she's been contacting me through text, i did answer everytime, but i said. i have to go now. i know she's feeling that im not there for her anymore, i dont wanna bore you with all the details. but its just small things i recognize because i know her so well.
Recommended Posts