arbrne_vet Posted November 21, 2011 Posted November 21, 2011 my "fiance" and i use that term oh so lightly, officially ended things mid September. did not take her long to start a relationship with someone else. i believe she was seeing him, and me at the same time. i believe the same thing happened when i met her. She is a "soul with no footprint" anyway, she won't give me my engagement ring back. will more than likely be taking her to court to get it back. went to a big social event here in town Friday evening, and i was terrified of running into her. the main reason is i don't know what kind of feelings will run through me when i do. she put me through hell this past year. became someone i don't even know. very manipulative, controlling, and abusive. i have been purposefuly trying to stay away from places we might run into each other, mainly at the local stores that i know she goes. i go to a different town altogether to make sure i don't run into her. i don't want to see her, i don't want to talk to her, i don't even want her to know i even exist on this planet. will this go away? very much open for suggestions. thanks!
mike588 Posted November 21, 2011 Posted November 21, 2011 (edited) Yes those feelings WILL go away in time. I was in a 11 year relationship with my ex. ex. and I felt the same way for some time. I've ran into her several times,, matter of fact I saw her,and she saw me in a store 2 weeks ago and it didn't bother me one bit! We have been broken almost 2 years. Now with my latest ex. of 3 months I'm not ready to see/face her, I'm sure it will bring back the hurt and I avoid places where she might be, I know my heart would jump out of my chest especially if I saw her with her ex. that she went back to Time is our friend,just give it more of that. Edited November 21, 2011 by mike588
geegirl Posted November 21, 2011 Posted November 21, 2011 After my break up, I changed my route to work (ex lives down the street), changed stores I visited, routes to work, changed my gym, ...basically wanted to avoid any possible bumping into him. It's good to keep away, even if it means declining social events or skipping out on a party, etc. if you know she might be there, until you get yourself together. There is no reason to self-sabotage your healing as many do, believing they're strong enough or needing to prove a point or most times to provoke a reaction. In time, and it also matters what you do with that time, you will be able to go back to your routine. As I am doing now. I've bumped into him a few times, and while it's a little bit of a surprise for the first couple of seconds, it's not emotional at all. Just indifference.
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