Breezy17 Posted November 20, 2011 Posted November 20, 2011 I decided to post today because I really need some advice. or nudge. or who knows, a lambasting. I'm Caucasian; I live in one of the lower South east united states. and..I had many-a-tough time growing up being in the area, to turn a black man down here, he'll call you a "racist". (I'll admit not all of them had this attitude, but the ones that did, I couldnt stand.) So they'd usually target me and mock me, put me on the spot. harass me, and just in general treat me foul. and In addition to that, I really definitely did not find them attractive in any shape or form. Would I say I was racist against black males then, no definitely not. Did it turn into that? Well, I'd not acknowledge any black males at all. And I'd think lowly of any woman that would date them as if they were on the lowest rung. This new guy I am seeing -- what to expected when I'm in public with him more & more? He already knows he's been rejected for being a black male. I'm not ready just yet to speak on what my old opinion has been. may rise his securities. I'm getting to know him now as an honest person, minus the race topic. I wouldnt tell a white male this off top, so I should act the same with this? WE both have equal morals, good laughs, and times. How would I bring up the race topic to him? "let's talk..." ..."do you mind if i'm white?" haha, i already know he doesnt mind... but i really dont know! So, i think i should hear the real deal. And what others think. Has anyone has this situation, from being so adamant against dating a person of X race or characteristic then you finally did? How'd did this go, and what is to be expected? I definitely felt my view shift after I spoke with him. For him, only... I still grasp my other stereotype sadly... And I want to tell him but not want to tell him, you know? i feel in a way, i could love him more because i was so against it. But maybe that's why I'm getting into it now, since I used to be so against it?...
Jane2011 Posted November 20, 2011 Posted November 20, 2011 I'm an Asian female and pretty much all of my past boyfriends have been either White or Hispanic. I was very rarely attracted to Indian men, so much so that, generally speaking, I would say that I was not interested in Indian men. But I just started dating an Indian guy two weeks and one day ago (have seen him four times in that time period), and I am very into him. He's absolutely nice. And hot. So...basically, life just gets more interesting when you broaden your horizons.
the wizard Posted November 20, 2011 Posted November 20, 2011 Figure since we're talking about race here I'd tell you about one of my demons. I'm into women of all races, that being said, I always kind of looked at non-black women who are into Black men as tainted kinda, trashy. Don't know why, I have Black friends, family, coworkers and I'm cool with them. Maybe its a demographic pertaining to region thing rather than race thing because before here I never had that issue. My girl doesn't mess with Black guys lol. Life is retarded like that I guess.
shayla Posted November 20, 2011 Posted November 20, 2011 With an interracial relationship, understand that comes with issues, and you have to know that you are ready to deal with those issues. If you are not, then avoid dating someone that isn't your race. If you are sensitive to what your family or friends think. If there are places you like to go that aren't welcome for anyone that isn't white. If you are out in public you may get some dirty looks, maybe even comments. With a black man, you may get some undue harrassment from law enforcement when you are out together....do you want to deal with all that? I mean look at this thread. Look what is being said here. People judging just from the color of the skin that someone is dating. You may not want to go down this road, It isn't for the weak.
Cracker Jack Posted November 20, 2011 Posted November 20, 2011 I have to agree with Shayla. I'm thinking if you decide to have a serious relationship with this guy, it likely won't work out. Most people today still glare at others who date outside of their race, since they're so against it. That might be a bit too much for you. If you're not comfortable with the idea of dating a black man because of your surroundings, then just don't date them.
norajane Posted November 21, 2011 Posted November 21, 2011 For him, only... I still grasp my other stereotype sadly... So what will happen when you meet and mingle with his family, and his friends? Will you be giving them the side-eye? You can't make an exception from your stereotypes for one person, because your views will affect your interactions with everyone else...and he will notice and be offended.
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