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um should I try to be open to dating black guys?


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Posted

I'm of indian descent. I'm very dark. I'm dark for even black people around that or lighter medium at lightest. People think I'm black/somewhat? Because I'm very dark and have full lips. Plus my nose is not pronounce like any race. So the fact that I associiate with my family who is I am assumed to be black. I even look like my adoptive mom oddly enough. My mom well the woman who raised me and the family I grew up in was black. But I'm not attracted to them.despite their cultural influence. The thing is it seems like well there's this guy at work I think is interested in me but he's african american. Besides his face he's everything I like. He understands me and we've become very close in only a short time. Physically even he's tall and has the body type I like. Many girls think he's hot I can't seem to see it though. The issue are the main features of racial background turns me off. Like I don't see how I'd make out with him. I would feel comfortable yet emotionally I wish I were really close like more than friends. But it's like I can totally see beauty in black women but just not men? Plus I preffer hairier guys? I don't know why I'm so shallow. I know I have some flaws myself. Yet I can't help it. Advice? Should I ignore it and just date or should it be a dealbreaker? Is it fair what I believed?

Posted

There is nothing shallow about being attracted to a certain type. That seems to be hardwired in most people. Would you be attracted to this man if he were white with the same facial features?

Posted
Advice?

 

You should date individuals who you find attractive and you shouldn't date individuals who you don't find attractive, regardless of skin colour or ethnic origin in both cases.

Posted

If you find them attractive you should date them.

 

That said don't let anyone tell you that some will frown on an interracial relationship. The question is do you have the fortitude to handle it.

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Posted
There is nothing shallow about being attracted to a certain type. That seems to be hardwired in most people. Would you be attracted to this man if he were white with the same facial features?

 

I'm majorly attracted to brown guys even guys his color just usually of indian or mestizo latinos. It's got more to do with the actual features. If he were of indian like tamil descent or mixed descent I'd be 100% ready to go further it's just he doesn't have the facial appearance I'd preffer at all.

Posted

You shouldn't convince yourself to date someone who you don't find attractive. It doesn't matter what his race is. Hey, maybe you could meet a black guy who has the type of face you like. But don't beat yourself up over it. :)

Posted
I'm majorly attracted to brown guys even guys his color just usually of indian or mestizo latinos. It's got more to do with the actual features. If he were of indian like tamil descent or mixed descent I'd be 100% ready to go further it's just he doesn't have the facial appearance I'd preffer at all.

 

If you date a guy you are not attracted to, then you are doing both him and yourself a disservice.

Posted

Date who you want to date, not who you think you should date

Posted
If you date a guy you are not attracted to, then you are doing both him and yourself a disservice.

 

Agreed.

 

We don't really choose who/what we are attracted to and although some call it shallow....physical attraction is part of a relationship... often the key starting factor before it grows deeper.

Posted
I'm of indian descent. I'm very dark. I'm dark for even black people around that or lighter medium at lightest. People think I'm black/somewhat? Because I'm very dark and have full lips. Plus my nose is not pronounce like any race. So the fact that I associiate with my family who is I am assumed to be black. I even look like my adoptive mom oddly enough. My mom well the woman who raised me and the family I grew up in was black. But I'm not attracted to them.despite their cultural influence. The thing is it seems like well there's this guy at work I think is interested in me but he's african american. Besides his face he's everything I like. He understands me and we've become very close in only a short time. Physically even he's tall and has the body type I like. Many girls think he's hot I can't seem to see it though. The issue are the main features of racial background turns me off. Like I don't see how I'd make out with him. I would feel comfortable yet emotionally I wish I were really close like more than friends. But it's like I can totally see beauty in black women but just not men? Plus I preffer hairier guys? I don't know why I'm so shallow. I know I have some flaws myself. Yet I can't help it. Advice? Should I ignore it and just date or should it be a dealbreaker? Is it fair what I believed?

 

Honestly, I don't think many Black guys would care. If you were a Princess white woman, young, with great long hair, soft clear skin, and a body to die for, then yea, please be open to us! But in your case...

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Posted

most white girls I know don't have as nice of a body or hair as indian girls do imo. I'm a tomboy so I keep my hair short well what I call short (just below the shoulder). And my body is unlike most women. Because I'm stick thin with a good size chest. So yea I think comparing to most women I have more in the physically body side. It's actually my pride and joy. I do get a lot of attention from black guys actually more than my own true race. But not really what what I like. My mom's black and she gets attention from white guys more than black guys she goes both ways so it works for her.

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Posted
Agreed.

 

We don't really choose who/what we are attracted to and although some call it shallow....physical attraction is part of a relationship... often the key starting factor before it grows deeper.

 

I'm shallow I realize but I guess I accept it.

Posted
I'm of indian descent. I'm very dark. I'm dark for even black people around that or lighter medium at lightest. People think I'm black/somewhat? Because I'm very dark and have full lips. Plus my nose is not pronounce like any race. So the fact that I associiate with my family who is I am assumed to be black. I even look like my adoptive mom oddly enough. My mom well the woman who raised me and the family I grew up in was black. But I'm not attracted to them.despite their cultural influence. The thing is it seems like well there's this guy at work I think is interested in me but he's african american. Besides his face he's everything I like. He understands me and we've become very close in only a short time. Physically even he's tall and has the body type I like. Many girls think he's hot I can't seem to see it though. The issue are the main features of racial background turns me off. Like I don't see how I'd make out with him. I would feel comfortable yet emotionally I wish I were really close like more than friends. But it's like I can totally see beauty in black women but just not men? Plus I preffer hairier guys? I don't know why I'm so shallow. I know I have some flaws myself. Yet I can't help it. Advice? Should I ignore it and just date or should it be a dealbreaker? Is it fair what I believed?

Hey if you aren't attracted to African American guys then don't date them. It's ok. I'm not attracted to them so I don't date then. It's as simple as that. It's not being shallow, it's called preference. There is nothing wrong with it.:)

Posted

Blacks dudes holler at anything non-black let's be honest here.

 

If you aren't into Black Guys then so be it, who cares. I'm not into girls who are into Black Guys. They just tend to be a certain way.

Posted
Blacks dudes holler at anything non-black let's be honest here.

 

If you aren't into Black Guys then so be it, who cares. I'm not into girls who are into Black Guys. They just tend to be a certain way.

And which way is that? There was a mixed guy on here not too long ago that hated when women dated black men even though he was part black himself. It made no sense.:rolleyes:

Posted

No. Obviously you are not attracted to them, so why would you want to disrespect yourself like that?

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Posted

how am I disrespecting myself? And not all black guys date interracially both my uncles have all married and had kids with black women and they ranged from dark medium to light. No one in my mom's family have actually interracially married or had kids. They're all black

I'm realizing I seldom am attracted to dark skinned black guys. So I guess it's not racial I'm just not attracted to him

Posted
how am I disrespecting myself? And not all black guys date interracially both my uncles have all married and had kids with black women and they ranged from dark medium to light. No one in my mom's family have actually interracially married or had kids. They're all black

I'm realizing I seldom am attracted to dark skinned black guys. So I guess it's not racial I'm just not attracted to him

 

Attraction isn't a choice. Don't try to force something that won't work out.

Posted
Attraction isn't a choice. Don't try to force something that won't work out.

Exactly.

 

The OP must be British...

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Posted

why would you think that

Posted
My mom's black

 

 

I'm puzzled...

 

Are you again speaking of the person who raised you, and not of your biological mother???

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Posted

I was raised by a black woman she's the only mom I knew...

Posted

Why would you even consider dating a black guy if you aren't interested in them? That wouldn't be fair to the black guy. Why don't you chose to date from the race you find attractive?

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Posted

wel my mom and my family acts like indian american guys aren't like good enough and it's rare found a guy with the same religious background of either white or latin american descent so yea....

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Posted

wel my mom and my family acts like indian american guys aren't like good enough and it's rare found a guy with the same religious background of either white or latin american descent so yea......

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