Rose_Petal Posted November 18, 2011 Posted November 18, 2011 (edited) Hi there, I just wanted to know how you have all dealt with being around or seeing your ex's new significant other if that ever happened to you. You see, I don'T have much of a choice about being around her and my ex. Let me explain why... Over 6 years ago, I joined a theater troup that presented Canada's biggest outdoor play with a record number spectators, called "L'écho d'un peuple" It'a all about french canadian history and it's an amazing troupe to be part of. I grew up in this theater troup...we did three shows a week during the summer and tours all over ontario during the rest of the year. I started at 11 years old and am now 17. It was the one place were I felt the most comfortable. Nobody ever judged me, I made some of my closest friends there, etc. All this to say that this place was my sanctuary and it's where I built most of my self confidence (now in a shattered state) and felt like I could accomplish anything. It made me more outgoing, showed me not to be afraid of being who I am (teenage years...so complicated ) ANyway, when I started dating me ex, I brought him into this theater troupe. I made sure all of my friends became his friends, that he felt at home. However, he was still there as my boyfriend...he wasn'T an official member. When we broke up, I assumed he would forget about it because it was something I introduced him too and he had even told me right after we broke up that he respected that it was my space, and he wouldn't stick around because he knew how important it was to me...yeah well this guy is all talk and no action. He officially signed up in the troupe and brought his new gf with him...I was devastated! I don't want to give this up, because of how uncomfortable it would be. And he knows I probably won't go back if he'S there. He's been a real jerk to me since we broke up, accusing me of being slutty (never even kissed anyone else yet!), spending too much, and telling me that I should't wear any make-up (because he said I only wore make-up for him...) and that I shouldn't go shopping, hang out with friends, ect because it made me look desperate This said, I have the intention of eventually going bake once I am more mentally prepared but I don't know how I should act around him or his new gf. I see these options: 1) Be really nice to his gf (because honestly she seems like a really nice girl) and be polite with him. If all was perfect there would be a mutual respect and he would apreciate me treating his girlfriend like any other member of the troupe...however I doubt this is what will happen. 2) Completly ignore both of them 3) Wait to see how they react... I don't know what to do! Does anybody have any advice? Will his new gf hate my guts just because she knows I'm his ex? I hate being seen as the phsyco bitch but apparently, from what I've heard, that's how he's been portraying me :S Edited November 18, 2011 by Rose_Petal
Rorschach64 Posted November 19, 2011 Posted November 19, 2011 Rose if you decide to go back to this troupe, why in gods name would you want to even talk to someone that slanders your name so casually just to make himself feel better? I don't know what the deal is with this new girl but suffice to say I think if you are forced in to communicating with those two I suggest you be polite but other wise avoid if necessary. I am only cautious of the new girl because I suspect she probably knew of your relationship with your ex and decided to influence him anyway.
shayla Posted November 19, 2011 Posted November 19, 2011 If it were me, I'd ignore them unless forced to communicate with them, then I'd be cordial but nothing more. Be ready for him to try to make it as difficult as possible. If he was a jerk before, expect him to be an absolute dick now. Be ready for it, and be ready to not let either of them see you sweat. This is your sanctuary and it can still be. Once he sees that you aren't bothered by his foolishness, he will give up trying. You have to decide which is more important. His stupidity, or doing what you love in spite of anyone else. Good luck.
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