Zabs Posted November 18, 2011 Posted November 18, 2011 :mad:bi polar actions. I am sorry you are in this situation...and also the welfare of the kids being affected...but I feel compelled to educate that people with Bi-Polar Mood Disorder are not The Devil incarnate...nor does it take a BP diagnosis to make a person self absorbed and insensitive to the feelings of others. BPMD is a mental illness and is caused by chemical imbalances in the brain. I will not argue that some behaviours are learned...but please do not use such generic 'labelling' for pwBP as it delineates ignorance and the inability to demonstrate empathy with a 'group' of people, who at many times have difficulty controlling feelings and behaviours.
Zabs Posted November 18, 2011 Posted November 18, 2011 Im playing games with a game player. Unfortunately, much of the time..we are playing a game whether we choose to take our move or not Zabs xx
w0nderwoman Posted November 19, 2011 Posted November 19, 2011 Wilson: you are doing so much better! Not that I wasn't angry myself but you were harboring that for awhile. You're so on the ball on everything and asking the right questions. To all: I think that justice is relative and I think it's important to ask yourself wouldn't you rather have the justice of health and self-respect than the justice of another's suffering? I am curious, how is justice? For those of you that have not gotten this said justice? Why do you think this is justice? I do not wish bad things on my ex even though she went out of her way to insult me, belittle my character, and then some more just so she can walk away guilt free. Best justice served is when you move on and accept things for how they are instead of wishing ill on your ex's even if they deserve it or not. Otherwise the justice you are seeking may never come at all. Justice I want is the self serving justice of moving on, growing from the experience in to a better person that is also stronger because we all know that can only come from me and not my ex or anyone else. I think ignoring an ex that is trying to reach out via ego boost/bread crumb/ whatever isn't serving justice it is doing myself and them a favor because obviously at that point they are most likely confused, lonely, and/or feeling guilty while I am not there to coddle them because it was a choice they made so they must deal with their own demons like the rest of us. I think the best justice you can do is just find happiness within yourself and live your life to the fullest. Show them that you don't need them to be happy ya know? I have been doing this for seven weeks now, strict NC and just letting go, and my ex has already tried to reach out to me twice. Of course I miss him so much and still love him, but I stood my ground and gave him nothing in his attempts to reach out to me. I know I am not ready to have him in my life again, but it does feel good to have some power back in the whole thing. That way now he has to wait for me to decide when we can talk again, not him. You are right guys. This isn't justice. This is just pathetic. You should help your ex emotionally and physically when she need you.
EgoJoe Posted November 19, 2011 Posted November 19, 2011 I disagree with Wonderwoman to a degree. We've all seen Goodfellas (hopefully) and it's a prime example of when turning your back on someone is a grand kindness. Compassion doesn't always mean active sympathy.
seibert253 Posted November 19, 2011 Posted November 19, 2011 She's losing, your winning. The "oooh sh#t if F'd up" is sitting in. Keep moving forward, don't go back to where you've been.
smokey bear Posted November 19, 2011 Posted November 19, 2011 I wish my ex well. My justice?????? Indifference. xx
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