nevadagirl Posted November 17, 2011 Posted November 17, 2011 Quick Rundown of Life Since a Breakup 1) The ex does not care if he hurts me. 2) The ex still wants my attention on him. 3) The ex ****ed his other ex - someone that was a large source of insecurity in our relationship. 4) The ex didn't have the decency to make his album of the two of them private. (But hey it's his FB right? ) 5) I have taken, what I felt, were drastic measures to avoid him. I set up filters to automatically delete his emails, I even went so far as to give my email and facebook accounts and password to a friend and not to let me have them back. (But I fell off the wagon and got highly upset when the ex made a dating profile, "visited" mine on purpose and Hurtful Things were revealed which made me knee-jerk visit his facebook and it went down from there, to say the least. 4) I told the ex I didn't feel there was any friendship to be had between the two of us - especially considering how he wouldn't leave me alone long enough to feel better (has never stopped contacting me since the break up 2 months ago). He denies any wrongdoing! He was never malicious! 5) He keeps messaging me on okc. I feel trapped and frustrated because...I know it's just a stupid dating site but for awhile it was an easy outlet to meet people, or to kill time, or just whatever. I feel like I'm slowly having to hide away from the internet and it's pissing me off. I have "blocked" him on this site but it does NOTHING. He can still send messages! What's bothering me the most is that part of me WANTS to receive these messages. I don't know why. It is NOT because I want to be friends and it is NOT because I think there is a chance in hell we'll ever get back together - he is over me and is happy and everytime he sends me some plucky "hey you should come out and see this band tonight!" message I feel like I want to rip his ****ing fingernails out one by one just so he could never type me another stupid ****ing message. I feel trapped. I don't want to live in a cave. I just want to feel better.
chados Posted November 17, 2011 Posted November 17, 2011 Quick Rundown of Life Since a Breakup 1) The ex does not care if he hurts me. 2) The ex still wants my attention on him. 3) The ex ****ed his other ex - someone that was a large source of insecurity in our relationship. 4) The ex didn't have the decency to make his album of the two of them private. (But hey it's his FB right? ) 5) I have taken, what I felt, were drastic measures to avoid him. I set up filters to automatically delete his emails, I even went so far as to give my email and facebook accounts and password to a friend and not to let me have them back. (But I fell off the wagon and got highly upset when the ex made a dating profile, "visited" mine on purpose and Hurtful Things were revealed which made me knee-jerk visit his facebook and it went down from there, to say the least. 4) I told the ex I didn't feel there was any friendship to be had between the two of us - especially considering how he wouldn't leave me alone long enough to feel better (has never stopped contacting me since the break up 2 months ago). He denies any wrongdoing! He was never malicious! 5) He keeps messaging me on okc. I feel trapped and frustrated because...I know it's just a stupid dating site but for awhile it was an easy outlet to meet people, or to kill time, or just whatever. I feel like I'm slowly having to hide away from the internet and it's pissing me off. I have "blocked" him on this site but it does NOTHING. He can still send messages! What's bothering me the most is that part of me WANTS to receive these messages. I don't know why. It is NOT because I want to be friends and it is NOT because I think there is a chance in hell we'll ever get back together - he is over me and is happy and everytime he sends me some plucky "hey you should come out and see this band tonight!" message I feel like I want to rip his ****ing fingernails out one by one just so he could never type me another stupid ****ing message. I feel trapped. I don't want to live in a cave. I just want to feel better. either he's the biggest idiot ever, or he's actually not over you? or maybe both.. have you ever thought about that? maybe he cant handle to be rejected. or maybe he loves you and the only way he knows to get your attention is to hurt you. let me ask you this. are you really over him? i would actually like to hear what he would say if you had a boyfriend?.
Author nevadagirl Posted November 17, 2011 Author Posted November 17, 2011 Oh he's a total psycho. He wants to be friends. He wants to be friends with all of his exes. No one ever "dies" for him. All crap he's said. He did the same **** to his ex girlfriend when we were together - always tried to be "friends" or whatever. And what's he go and do after we break up? Travels 5 states north to go **** HER AND HAVE A GREAT TIME AND TAKE PIX. He'd been messaging me the whole time but I was ignoring it (up until I created a filter to delete his emails) so I didn't know this. He just said "you know me, lonely and prone to impulse" bla bla bla He's a ****ing psycho and he's a stranger to me now and I have no interest in being around him let alone being FRIENDS. No I'm not over him - I never pretended to be over him. I kept a pathetic little journal detailing my stupid heartbreak. I tried to wish him well (to myself) but I knew I'd never get passed this if I kept in contact with him. So what does he do? Won't go the **** away. I feel mad mad mad - like I'm being some big victim. whiinnnne whyyy won't he leave me alloonnnnnee whiiine so yea sure in his twisted psychotic way he "loves" me but it's not what you're thinking, i promise you.
M2155 Posted November 17, 2011 Posted November 17, 2011 I don't get it. How are you trapped unless you let yourself be trapped? Delete his messages. BLOCK him on Facebook...go do it right now. If you can't ignore his lame attempts on OKC report him or go to match.com if it bothers you that much. You don't want him so take control girl!
chados Posted November 17, 2011 Posted November 17, 2011 Oh he's a total psycho. He wants to be friends. He wants to be friends with all of his exes. No one ever "dies" for him. All crap he's said. He did the same **** to his ex girlfriend when we were together - always tried to be "friends" or whatever. And what's he go and do after we break up? Travels 5 states north to go **** HER AND HAVE A GREAT TIME AND TAKE PIX. He'd been messaging me the whole time but I was ignoring it (up until I created a filter to delete his emails) so I didn't know this. He just said "you know me, lonely and prone to impulse" bla bla bla He's a ****ing psycho and he's a stranger to me now and I have no interest in being around him let alone being FRIENDS. No I'm not over him - I never pretended to be over him. I kept a pathetic little journal detailing my stupid heartbreak. I tried to wish him well (to myself) but I knew I'd never get passed this if I kept in contact with him. So what does he do? Won't go the **** away. I feel mad mad mad - like I'm being some big victim. whiinnnne whyyy won't he leave me alloonnnnnee whiiine so yea sure in his twisted psychotic way he "loves" me but it's not what you're thinking, i promise you. your not over him, but you don't like him.. thats why you get hurt. if you were over him you probably wouldn't care. but what do you think would happen if he texted you/emailed you and you said, you have to stop texting me cause im on a date?
geegirl Posted November 17, 2011 Posted November 17, 2011 (edited) How are you feeling trapped just because of a dating site that you choose to keep visiting knowing that he can continuously break your boundaries? You choose to feel trapped. You want to hear from him because you have slivers of hope. You may know you will never be together but hope manifests itself in very subtle and unusual ways. While you are angry, you still love him and his contact is a validation for you that he still cares. And you need it as it probably soothes your pain and discomfort of why he left. That is why you won't completely sever all ties. If you are tired of feeling trapped, get off OKC, get on POS since you desire a distraction. Otherwise, it's a conscious choice to keep feeding the monster. Edited November 17, 2011 by geegirl
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