BrokenNTexas Posted November 15, 2011 Posted November 15, 2011 I have read a lot of the posts on this board and I know heartbreak has no age limit. However most of you that have been lucky enough to get a 2nd chance are in your 30's or younger. I'm 48, and was dumped almost 2 months ago by my fiance after us being together 10 years. He has always had a fascination with younger women. I had issues with him watching porn off and on the whole time we were together. It was really a problem because he liked to view so called teen porn and I have daughters the age of these young women. He never touched them or made any advances towards them, but it always made me uncomfortable as a parent. I couldn't help but wonder if he ever thought of my girls that way? He knew it hurt me and made me mad, yet all the promises to stop became lies. I put a spy program on his computer and later a tracker on his phone, because I knew he couldn't be trusted. I believe this is actually an addiction and one that escalated towards the end, because it actually took my place in our relationship. He could no longer perform with me, yet he seemed to have no problem with his little bottle of pills and his porn on a daily basis. He finally decided he would rather have the porn than be with me, plus I believe he cheated/hooked up with someone else, which made it very easy to just walk away and forget all about me. He was so cold and detached the day he got his stuff, while I was falling apart. I haven't seen of heard from him since. I miss him so much and still love him with all my heart. That may be wrong but I know he has a sex addiction and he needs help. I want so much to contact him, but I am not handling his leaving me well at all. I fear his "new love" being there if I did contact him and having him reject me a 2nd time. I believe that would be my breaking point and I would do something I would or maybe wouldn't regret. I just want to hear someone else's perspective on this sad situation. Do I have any chance at all for him to have a change or heart or am I looking at a future of growing old alone? No matter what, I am not starting over. I'm too old and it just hurts too damn much. I appreciate anyone who actually read this thing through. Any advice or opinions are welcome, just please no flaming. My emotions are raw enough already. Thank you.
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