rubberball Posted November 14, 2011 Posted November 14, 2011 I'd been strict no contact for just over a month (broken up three month) In that time she has told other people in my office that I won't talk to her, she also is seeing a new guy. Not only do we work together we live within a .25 of a mile of each other. She called the office today to ask me something about work I answered her question and got off the phone. Why would she bother calling when obviously she knows I dont want to talk to her. In addition, I still have some of her stuff at my house that she can't seem to come pickup. its bigger stuff, a bed, desk stuff like that so I cant really just mail it or drop it off. Why does she keep dragging her feet about getting her stuff - I guess I am just free storage at this point. I don't want to talk to her, or hear her voice, its takes me back and that hurts.
nathanjbrown1 Posted November 14, 2011 Posted November 14, 2011 I Think you need to talk to her...one last conversation between you two...So that both of you could clear thing now in last time..
Dims85 Posted November 14, 2011 Posted November 14, 2011 message her and let her know that you are having her stuff picked up by goodwill and you are donating it next week. if she wants it pick it up before then or its gone. Dont be rude but just tell it how it is, the rs is over she needs to get her stuff, dragging her feet and leaving her stuff in your house does nothing for the two of you. You need to cut the ties and let her realize the decision she made to leave you. Whether she comes back or not you need to move on. seeing the bed she guys F'd in probably wont help you heal, sorry to be so blunt but get rid of it!
Author rubberball Posted November 15, 2011 Author Posted November 15, 2011 Its not her bed, it's a kids bed, but I see the point. I do want the stuff gone and have been telling myself that she is keeping it here to have one last reason to call me. We were best friends for a long time before we got together, I think I missed that more then the lose of the relationship. @nathan. You are probably right, just clear the air and tell her I don't want any contact. Close that door.
joseph17 Posted November 15, 2011 Posted November 15, 2011 It's her way of holding on to you. With her stuff there she will always have a reason to contact you. And if you miss the friendship then tell her and stop avoiding her. If you don't want to talk to her then let her know also. Either way her stuff needs to get out so you can have your piece of mind and clarity that it is over. There is know worse feeling than being at home and looking around to only see her stuff still there to remind you. Get rid of her stuff as soon as possible so you can cut her out of your life for now
Author rubberball Posted November 15, 2011 Author Posted November 15, 2011 I miss the friendship, but I don't think I can trust her. Perhaps, I miss the idea of what I thought we had. In a way I feel like having the stuff gives me power. It's records and "special" Xmas stuff besides the bed etc. if I can't be there for her to get it on her schedule and she complains I "get" to say that she had months to come and get it but didnt. I know it is childish but in a way I want her to hurt like I did. The best idea is probably just to say good will is coming.
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