Rorschach64 Posted November 19, 2011 Posted November 19, 2011 Problem with GIGs it can be loosely interperted to really a lot of situations. Some situations are black and white GIGs as described in that post I linked and some are like mine where ....a nuclear bomb went off aka projection of guilt, lying, someone else, and an engagement. Though someone else said my ex-fiancee was just an attention whore but both opinions had the same catalyst....me asking her to marry me set it off. We want our grass to be greener though and will prove it is. What do you mean by this exactly? Like the GIGs infected person will go out of their way to prove that it is indeed greener on the other side? I am 26 year olds and don't worry I don't mind lol
smokey bear Posted November 19, 2011 Posted November 19, 2011 After almost 6 months of NC I just broke it 2 times.. 1 like 2 months ago .. and now this time.. … .. .. I don’t know how I feel about it! And I don’t know if its good or bad… I was cheking fb AGAIN.. and I saw he and his gf blocked me from the other fb! .. :S who knows how he knew it was mine :S .. i closed them like 3 weeks ago... but tonight i got in again .... after that i closed them AGAIN to make sure i dont ever look!!!! ..... anyway.. I feel the need to ask him ... so i texted him this: “hey how are you? .. I need to ask you something.” ,.. he answered me and told me he was ok and that I could ask.. then I asked him if he thought I was an stalker! .. :s he said no and asked me why.. I told him that sometimes I wonder and want to know about him … he told me what he was doing and stuff and I told him to.. we sent a lot of messages until I asked him if he wanted to keep contact with me … .. he said that since the other time I called (like 2 months ago) he said yes .. but he never heard from me again……. I told him I didn’t want him to have problems with his gf.. and he said he could do what he wants without her permission… :s I told him it would suck not to see him in Christmas and that he could text me to then. He said that it would be good to know about me also... then good night and that was it… he also said that he was different with girls not like he was with me .. and stuff.. So what to do?! .. I do want to know about him! .. and I have no expectations I just want to know… I guess… it was good to hear from him and I think I feel better now.. I mean Im not looking to get him back…. Can I keep contact with him????? Or is it bad still?! .. I don’t know .. I mean I do feel things for him still…. WHAT DO I DO NOW?!????? How often can I sent him a txt?! .. ahhhh this is so difficult!!!! ... and i dont really expect him to sent me anything.. but it would be nice if he does... And is it bad if I want him back?! .. (which right now I don’t but i just want to know... ) --- crazy girl :S PLEASE ANSWER ANY ADVISE WOULD BE GOOD!! I didnt read the whole post, just the first page, i will go back later and read but... Have you tried some herbal remedies to calm the anxiety, i had the same and found once i calmed the anxiety the need to know or contact went away, the anxiety made it worse. IT was the problem. Also i read somewhere that some people cant let go until they really have exhausted theirselves, it takes many rejections and blows before they can let go. i don't recommend it but some people just can't until they have tired themselves sick of chasing. Its hard to let go by yourself, but what usually does it is finding yourself and being happy within yourself, you hear it all the time in threads, but dumpee's in the chase mode don't absorb this crutial golden nugget of healing until they have exhausted themselves and just want to heal.
Rorschach64 Posted November 19, 2011 Posted November 19, 2011 (edited) Heh at times I have slightly considered just pursueing my ex-fiancee and stalking her FB just looking for the sheer fact of being crushed, abused, and denied to the point of hopeless. Unfortunately I recognize that would also benefit her and well...let's be honest that isn't exactly healthy thinking anyway PS waking up at 4 am is awesome Edited November 19, 2011 by Rorschach64
lolita jade Posted November 19, 2011 Posted November 19, 2011 Rors, I only asked how old you were because in one post you mentioned 'next somester' and I thought you were older that school/ uni age I was right. Everyone, If the dumper is trying to prove grass is greener it doesnt hold out much hope. Especially when mine is going round telling everyone how happy he is. On the flip side of this, does that mean he will cling on to her even when/ if?? not exactly happy as he doesnt want to look a fool??? Or will he fool himself?? I was having a moment of thinking about 'what could be' this morning and felt real heart twangs. So got the hoover out, did housework and kept busy. Oh and came on here
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