chise Posted November 13, 2011 Posted November 13, 2011 Hello, I was thinking about this situation and i have already made my mind but i need some advise on how to proceed from here ... Two months ago I finished a relationship which broke my heart deeply and i guess did even change my way of thinking. Now I do not want to rush into a relationship just because of the company or intimacy. I have lots of friends and interests so i am really having fun. One month ago i slept with a friend of a friend. We didn't talk that much but he was nice, i was still very sad and i didn't contact him for one month. Then i texted him and he was happy to have drinks one day. We went out, he paid for everything (even if i insisted to don't do it) and then we went to my apartment and had sex all night long. Awesome sex. This was five days ago. We had fun and we talk a lot but i do not like him this way. I didn't feel any desire of talking to him about my life or knowing about him. He is much younger than me, different goals, different interests .. and really hot. I like to have sex with him though and i do not like to have sex with random people (even if i did that with him) so this seems a win win situation for me. I do not think he is going to contact me but i am sure he likes me and he likes the sex too. So should i contact him again ? How to explain him that i am not interested in him but i still want to sleep with him ? Thanks !!
Niagara Falls Posted November 13, 2011 Posted November 13, 2011 tell him straight up that your still recovering from a relationship and arent interested in him like that but would very much like a friends with benefits thing as he is a great guy. being straight up and simple towards a guy is exactly what us guys want. make it easy and if hes not looking for that or was interested in you for a relationship he will move on, but chances are he will agree and high five you. just remember its usually the female that eventually shows real feelings in these situations for the other, but if you know thats not a problem then just go get laid and have fun
eweezzee Posted November 13, 2011 Posted November 13, 2011 you said you talk alot but that hes not going to contact you? so im not sure how much you guys text or phone now but If he doesnt contact you then what are you worried about he just sees you as sex as well and a fun night out. If he was texting you everyday to hangout then you should have a talk with him otherwise theres nothing to talk about. If you have a talk with him and doesnt really contact you hes going to go o boy here we go lol Ive had plenty of girls tell me they want just a sex relationship but truth is they had feelings for me so for you i wouldnt even say anything to him unless he confesses he likes you. Until then you need to assume he feels the same way you do. Trust me im a strong believer in communication but having "talks" can complicate things and get him thinking even if its just to be friends with benifits.
Author chise Posted November 13, 2011 Author Posted November 13, 2011 (edited) I understand what you are saying but i am not really interested in him as a potential bf and i do not think he is interested in me this way either. Well, i know things can change but i feel safe here. With my previous bf i knew from second one i was in trouble. This is different. Sex is really good but it is not the impossible to control thing i had with my ex .. But having this conversation to him seems weird .. even more (and this can look strange) i do not want to be the one always instigating the contact. I mean, i am in if he is really in, not because is it convenient and easy ... I do not know if this makes sense ... Also as i do not know him well i do not know the amount of contact we are supposed to have ... What i know is that i do not want an exclusive thing, or questions about our love lives. I have been there and it is easy to get confused. Edited November 13, 2011 by chise
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