Still paranoid about being cheated on/screwed over in future relationships

[Sugarkane]

How do you deal?

[Buttercup84]

Hmmm I know what you mean . I guess I won't put him on a pedestal like i did with my ex . Bit still enjoy the relationship . Look out for red flags in the beginning . Its hard and you can't know . But it's best not to think that your new love is incapable of cheating . I thought my ex would never do that , but I suspect he did later . I dOnt make any sense sorry !

[mike588]

Like Butter said, Not to put her on a pedestal. Also listen to my gut feelings, watch for and this time act on red flags.

[wilsonx]

Has nothing to do with putting someone on the pedestal.

 

This is an insecurity that you have to overcome. This is something I discussed a lot with homebrew and it takes a long time to get over this and let go. You can not control what another person does. If they do it, it what it is, are you going to stay in the relationship this time?

 

I have even thought about this a lot and you know you just picked a bad person. I am in the same boat. You need to forgive yourself for what you did and keep heading forward.

 

I will tell you as long as you have this insecurity, you should not be in a relationship. Here's a good analogy, are you afraid that you are going to get hit by a drunk driver on your way to work in the morning/afternoon? If so you wouldn't be on the road.

 

Over come this, forgive yourself, be honest with yourself and good things will happen

[Rorschach64]

Wilsonx pretty much said it right.....it is life Sugar. We all go in to every relationship doe eyed and happy sunshine lollipops and other garbage but we all know deep down we go in to each relationship with the possibility of being let down time after time.

 

Best thing you can do is just try to adapt and overcome, plus like mike said listen to that gut feeling!

[carhill]

How do you deal?

 

Alone time to process those feelings to a neutral place.

[Marianis]

i still dont want to feel anything for anyone.. and if someone comes around i just push that person away... i closed myself for me not to feel pain again.. and i treat the the guy that cares about me really bad...

 

i dont look for guys and im afraid they will hurt me again .... i just think i will never feel that kind of love again and like "why bother?" if i will just end up broken heart again in the future... love is just a fantasy and people replasable!

 

i guess its just a face.. but its hard to realize that everything is a lie.