mercer2021 Posted November 13, 2011 Posted November 13, 2011 yeah, i've already posted about her. there is this shy girl who i work with who i'm having some trouble with. we had a date last week, which went pretty well. we had Coffee then walked around the neighbourhood and talked for about 2 hours. we have alot in common and have some great conversation. at the end of the night i tried to kiss her but she pushed me away saying "i have a thing about that" and then she said she "dosn't like to plan for the future". She was out of town for the weekend so we didn't make plans for the following weekend. On wendsday went into the store and she saw me and walked into the break room while wathcing me out of the corner of her eye. I figured it was because she was a little embarassed about what happened on our date. I tried to call her when I got home and got the mahcine. I left a message asking her if she was free saturday, she didn not call back. I went in today (saturday) to check my hours and she was not there, I called again when i got home. it rnag for a minute then i got the machine, i hung up without leaving a message. I find shy girls are very avoidant. After i talked to this girls for the first time she avoided me for like a week and i was only able to talk to her when she came to me. she dose that, she'll avoid me at work and then come to my section or make herself visible when she feels like its time. so i'm not sure how to proceed. I may or may nto see her tommorrow, if i do i'm asking her out again. but I don't like waiting 3 weeks jsut to get a kiss. and what if she has intimacy issues? what if we date for several months and theres no sex? i'm a good lookign guy. i get bites all the time, theres no reason why i can't find another girl. i am pretty sure this girl likes me, and i know shy girls avoid guys they like, but i don't like being avoided, and i'm going to be REALLY busy over the next 4 or 5 weeks with school and I'm worried we won't have enough time to date. anyway, i'm not sure what ot do. we are both 20, and i don't have cell phone so no texting. just to clear that up. i posted this on another site and the responder told me that she is keeping her options open and dosn't want to get too attached to anyone until she knows who she wants ot be with.
Anela Posted November 13, 2011 Posted November 13, 2011 It isn't necessarily true that she's keeping her options open, if she's shy. I was like that with someone I was strongly attracted to, and I eventually opened up more. I obviously can't say for sure that she is the same way, though.
ErgoStep Posted November 13, 2011 Posted November 13, 2011 so i'm not sure how to proceed. I may or may nto see her tommorrow, if i do i'm asking her out again. but I don't like waiting 3 weeks jsut to get a kiss. and what if she has intimacy issues? what if we date for several months and theres no sex? i'm a good lookign guy. i get bites all the time, theres no reason why i can't find another girl. i am pretty sure this girl likes me, and i know shy girls avoid guys they like, but i don't like being avoided, and i'm going to be REALLY busy over the next 4 or 5 weeks with school and I'm worried we won't have enough time to date. anyway, i'm not sure what ot do. It sounds like she's conservative in her belief system. Currently. Usually in dating the guy wants more, and the woman is holding back. There is no way to predict how far out of sync the two of you might be.
The dot Posted November 13, 2011 Posted November 13, 2011 A couple of points: 1. Dating co-workers is a BAD idea if you value your job. Sure, it seems great in the beginning, but what happens when you have a disagreement or break-up (which is the likely outcome at your age)? You still have to see her everyday, and interact in a civil, professional manner. Not easy. 2. Why do you need a serious relationship at 20 anyway? You should be concentrating on having fun, and doing all the things you won't be able to do when you're 35 and married. You should be dating as many women as possible, and if one has hang-ups about spending time with you, just move on to someone who DOES want to be with you. This girl doesn't sound like she has any real interest, or doesn't know what she wants (which is likely at her age). Let her figure out what she wants, and go and have some fun.
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