beachbum0311 Posted November 12, 2011 Posted November 12, 2011 Hello all, just had a breakup two weeks ago and it was the most wretched experience I could have imagined. I had a few bites of a sandwich in a three to four day period. I felt like I could not breathe at times and just wanted to sit down and cry when trying to go about my day. The hole left seemed like it could never be filled by anyone else. During this time I had amazing support from anyone that would listen. I think through everything I realized my own self worth... alot of it was through hearing friends and family tell me this. Anyway, I am 29 and was with a 24 year old girl. She was the best I could want, but the reality was, she was not in the same place that I was. She was at first but it had been a few months since she really felt the same. After a few weeks of "not being sure what she wanted," which she made the transition and I became even more devoted, she finally made the move. She is gone now, and you can't change the woman's ever so fickle heart. I think I realized what she was and where she was at in life, she was not ready for what things were headed towards. As much as this makes me rage, and it would've been nice to know ahead of time, that's how women are. I realized I loved her but she was just not that girl anymore. She was not what I fell in love with, if I ever did really love her, the best thing was to let her go. She had become so angry with me over nothing, it just proved to me this was not what I knew. The most important step here, and I mean THE most important step, is to realize some self worth. I have been able to get women in the past, as we all have, this is how we attracted the "person" that broke our heart. If you could get this woman that was so beautiful and wonderful, then guess what, you can do it again. It may get some getting back to you, but if you have done it once, then you can do it again. If she was willing to put you through what you went through... she was not that good anyway. Get back to yourself and remember what kind of person you were before, you are not destroyed, you will be stronger....
stunned8165 Posted November 12, 2011 Posted November 12, 2011 That's true!.... And I like......................
DannyT27 Posted November 12, 2011 Posted November 12, 2011 I'm in a similar situation I'm 27 she's 25... I'm starting to realise she ain't coming bk and it's easier and kinder to let her go if I love her I've just moved all my stuff bk to my mums today very stressful. But I knw that in time I will meet someone else no point dwelling on the past!
Teuen101 Posted November 12, 2011 Posted November 12, 2011 Seems they always get angry over nothing at the end, it's becasue they want out so they cook up things, my ex told me no one liked me, when in fact I got friends, she has none, it's so bad on her facebook for example and facebook isnt a place of real friends but old ones...some you can count on every day some you can't long gone friends. what I'm trying to say is the day after we broke up she changed her status and was in a relationship with some one new...and posted all kinds of stuff about him..no one even replyed or said congrats.. that says somthing.. I'm happy, I'm a happy go lucky person, a lover and giver, I was a emabler, but im changing that part of my self. I feel happy i did nothing wrong but love and try to understand, trust me always somthig better down the road she gotta fix her own problems.
Author beachbum0311 Posted November 15, 2011 Author Posted November 15, 2011 That sucks man, that is the hardest part is the feigned "I don't care." I have nothing but cliche things really to say about it, such as: Its better to know now, and your better off this way. These are cliche but its true... YOU ARE better off without someone that is capable of caring that little for you. Find that inner confidence you had before they destroyed it. I have a deep seeded feeling she ****ed up, hence the anger. Maybe she will realize it, maybe she won't... I was the one that handled the breakup with class. It does not really matter, just walk away and know you got her, with some time you can easily do better if you improve yourself past the point that you met. DO NOT settle for this garbage like I did.
hikaru Posted November 15, 2011 Posted November 15, 2011 I really like this. I was 27, she's 24. I suppose I can reduce the relationship to the same thing...she wasn't in the same place as I was. It's hard to say that and not want to defend the trivialities, but it's true. I wish she'd have opened up a little more emotionally and maybe become more attached, but she just wasn't ready to, and I only wish she'd handled it better than she did. I'm not one that gets lots of girls, never looked for casual relationships, so when things end, I always assume that's the last one...I just need to get out of this place, but at the moment, I'm not over her. She raised the bar as far as what I'd settle for, which is pretty damn annoying considering we can't be together. Anyway, thanks for the reflective thread, helps.
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