Why do we hold on?

[stillhurt]

No matter how much time has passed, it feels like I will never truly be over my ex. He once said to me that I cannot let go of people. That I have strong ties to my family and to him.

 

I have to admit that I never thought I would be someone to put up with his BS in the end. I thought I would be someone that would've never turned back after what he did to me. Of course, I discovered that I was the only idiot holding on. I am still struggling to completely let go of him and move on.

 

So, my question is, why do we hold on? What makes us hold onto people who have shown that they do not hold us in the same regard? And, in many cases have disrespected us and made us lose ourselves? I once thought I would never hold onto someone like him, but the past 9 months have proven that I am much weaker than I ever thought. Makes no sense!

[USMCHokie]

We hold in because we value ourselves based on others value us. If he was the last or only person to value us like that, we hold on because without it, we feel like we have no value, and we hold on hoping they come back to bring back that value.

 

You can let go only after you learn to value yourself without him.

[Rorschach64]

Love is an addiction, attachment, possessive traits within us all, pride, and uhhh desire.

 

Plus you know we all probably build a future in our minds with some of these people we date, I know I did, and now it is nothing but a ruined future that will never exist.

[headsashed]

I think we hold onto the good memories,im still struggling to completely let go of my ex but im learning to live without her and the next thing ill know is that i have let go. Why do they let go so easily? Well,i suppose its the dumpees that struggle to let go and the dumpers just do it,why,i dont really know,i think maybe its because they was the 1 to lose love for us and thats why they dumped us,hence we still love them as much as we did when we were together. Thats my insight anyway and im probably wrong lol.