Nikki21 Posted November 11, 2011 Posted November 11, 2011 Hi there, I new to the forum, and have just come on for a bit of advice as I seriously dont know what to do. Here's a bit of background. Im 33 my partner of 18 months is 32. We live together (in my old home) however have spent alot of time and money renovating the house to make a home together. My partner runs two business himself (he had just set them up when i met him) I have done everything I can to support him. I pay for everything financially and I also do everything around the home, he works from home. My work schedule has me away from home for a period of two weeks and then home for two weeks. My partner works very hard, generally from around 8am in the morning till sometimes 11pm at night. Again I have supported this and dont complain that we dont have fantastic social life etc etc, as I completly understood the pressures of running not one, but two business's. Appx 5 months ago I became very ill which has lead to me having two pretty serious operations etc, and two good stints in hospital. Anyway to cut a long story short, we have been through a bit of a rough patch the past 5 months, and I didnt help while I was ill, although its not been that bad, just a few big disagreements. My partner finds it hard to show his emotions and can be very detached sometimes, but again i understand and accept this, as I do know that he loves me in his own way. Anyway for the past two weeks he has been acting strange and distant. I must say first that he has always been planning to marry me next year! He talks of it all the time! Anyway I finally pinned him down and got out of him, that he does know whether we really 'get on!' To be honest since it all came out i'm absolutely distraught, although ive kept it away from him and we havent argued. He says that when we get on we really get on, and every thing is there set up for him, marriage, kids etc. Anyway now he has decided he wants to 'see how it goes' and see if it was just a rough patch! To be honest now im actually angry. I now feel like I am the one who does all the giving in the relationship, and i find it unfair. I dont ask him for any of his time as he is busy and now it just feels like he is basically calling all the shots. I am a very strong and independant woman, however should i now be questioning this mans commitment. I feel like I have given everything I have got to this relationship, thinking we where both working towards the same thing. Yes we have not been getting along great for a few months, but we also havent been at each others throats. He says I havent seemed happy, and I havent been, but nothing to do with him, my health has really suffered. Plus I also have a stressful job to contend with and the running of the home (again I never asked him to do any extra while I was ill, as I know how stressed he is with work) I have no problem giving my all to a relationship (when I thought thats what we both wanted) but if we are not on the same page them I now feel its unfair. And why should I invested more of myself into 'let see how it goes' Am im being unfair? Thoughts please everyone, because this is driving me insane. Look forward to your answers. Nikki
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