Author somedude81 Posted November 18, 2011 Author Posted November 18, 2011 Ok, so you don't go to clubs and bars, you don't go to parties, you rarely drink. Where are you going to be when you have drinks with the woman you have your eye on? That's why I made this thread... Is there even a specific woman in mind, or is this just a hypothetical situation. When I made this thread there was a girl in mind, but not any longer. Still I want to make sure that the next girl I get close to doesn't end up putting me in the friendzone. From what I've heard a "drunken hookup" is a good way to prevent that.
betterdeal Posted November 18, 2011 Posted November 18, 2011 What do you want, Cypress25? You cannot have a legal system that demands beyond a reasonable doubt and lock up innocent people. The former is DESIGNED to prevent the latter. That is the reason we have the former. Without the former, the latter occurs. I'm running out of ways to show you the two are intrinsically linked. Oh, I get it, you want a court to automatically believe that women never lie. Is that because women are too simple to lie? Never lie? Would never lie if they knew the court would automatically believe their story over the accused's? The principle of motive and opportunity doesn't apply to women in your world? You think that because she's a woman and he's a man then there is no doubt he raped her? As soon as you condemn men based solely on the say so of one other person, some women will abuse the system for all sorts of reasons, and all sorts of men will end up branded as rapists, not just the odd one here or there. You have just created a witch-hunt. Congratulations. No-one here wants to protect rapists. I want innocent people to be protected and a legal system such as you are asking for is ripe for ruining the lives of innocent people, and it certainly does not fit the criteria of beyond a reasonable doubt.
betterdeal Posted November 18, 2011 Posted November 18, 2011 We'll have to agree to disagree on that one. There are worse things, in my opinion. Like imprisoning millions of innocent people, then liquidating them in gas chambers?
Cypress25 Posted November 18, 2011 Posted November 18, 2011 Oh, I get it, you want a court to automatically believe that women never lie. Is that because women are too simple to lie? Never lie? Would never lie if they knew the court would automatically believe their story over the accused's? The principle of motive and opportunity doesn't apply to women in your world? You think that because she's a woman and he's a man then there is no doubt he raped her? OMG, did you even read my last post? I'm not talking about what happens in court. I'm talking about what happens from the time a woman is raped to the time the case goes to trial. If it ever goes to trial, that is. I'm talking about what happens BEFORE a decision is made in court. All of the intimidation and harsh treatment of the victim, who is automatically assumed to be lying. Not by the court (remember, we're not there yet). By the police, by her family, by her community, by her school, by any authority figure that has a responsibility to protect the victim. These are all the people who automatically assume the woman is lying, even though they have no reason to assume that. This is rape culture, and it takes place outside the court room. No wonder so many victims are afraid to press charges. No wonder so many of them drop charges before it goes to trial. No other crime is treated that way, it's just rape. Victims are actually punished just for reporting the rape! Is that right? Should people be punished for reporting crimes? Should we assume that anyone who reports a crime is lying? Should we automatically jump to the criminal's defense? It's not even a feminist issue. You think women are the only victims of rape? Men can be raped too. No one believes them either. They're subjected to the same harsh treatment as women if they report the crime. Why is rape even illegal, if that's the attitude? It might as well be legal, since rapists are never punished, and people seem to think that's a good thing. It is totally inappropriate for the police to automatically assume that a person is lying when they report a crime. Man or woman, it doesn't matter. The whole point of a police investigation is to find out if the claim is true. But in many rape cases, the police don't even investigate. As soon as the claim is made, the police assume it's a lie. No investigation necessary, if anyone says "rape," they must be lying. I'm pretty sure our current legal system is not supposed to work that way. I want innocent people to be protected and a legal system such as you are asking for is ripe for ruining the lives of innocent people, and it certainly does not fit the criteria of beyond a reasonable doubt. How many times did I say I don't expect the legal system to change? It's the attitude that needs to change. There is no law that says "Anyone who reports a rape must be automatically doubted and intimidated until they drop charges." And yet, that's what happens. There's nothing wrong with the law, but there is something wrong with law enforcement officers who treat victims that way. They're not supposed to do that, according to our legal system. "Beyond a reasonable doubt" does NOT mean "harass the victim until he/she is so intimidated that charges are dropped." You obviously don't want innocent people to be protected, because rape victims are innocent people, and you're saying the law shouldn't protect them.
Floridaman Posted November 18, 2011 Posted November 18, 2011 (edited) Originally Posted by dasein That and the rest of your posts in this thread sounds like something a stalker would say. It's not your job to keep anyone accountable. He's my cyber stalker. I wish I could get a restraining order to keep him away. Tek was only offering advice, gained from his similar experience. He's close to 30 and is still single, so he's gone through what you have. No need to call anyone a stalker here. Don't be so sensitive and take things personally. He isn't attacking you but trying to get you out of our comfortable shell and out meeting women. Don't start a thread if you don't want advice. Many have offered you sound advice, but you instantly reject it instead of trying some of the things they recommend. Getting a girl drunk isn't gonna help you win a woman's heart. Edited November 18, 2011 by Floridaman
Teknoe Posted November 18, 2011 Posted November 18, 2011 Tek was only offering advice, gained from his similar experience. He's close to 30 and is still single, so he's gone through what you have. No need to call anyone a stalker here. Don't be so sensitive and take things personally. He isn't attacking you but trying to get you out of our comfortable shell and out meeting women. Don't start a thread if you don't want advice. Many have offered you sound advice, but you instantly reject it instead of trying some of the things they recommend. Getting a girl drunk isn't gonna help you win a woman's heart. It's interesting to see how defensive SD is. I have been in his shoes, girl-obsessive, easily defensive, super stubborn, etc. Over the years I slowly learned how to live a healthier, happier lifestyle. One that includes rich friendship, a good family life and a relationship with Christ. There is definitely more to life than girls. I feel sad that he's still so defensive and stubborn. I guess he'll find out on his own one day...
oaks Posted November 18, 2011 Posted November 18, 2011 That's why I made this thread... Ok. So if you don't go to clubs and bars and you don't go to or host parties then the only options for having a drink with a girl are when you go on a date with her (eg to a restaurant), but requires you to ask her on a date and her to accept - and I'm guessing you're struggling with one or both of those. Drunken hookups happen at places where people get drunk... and you're not going to these places... so I don't think it's going to happen. When I made this thread there was a girl in mind, but not any longer. Still I want to make sure that the next girl I get close to doesn't end up putting me in the friendzone. From what I've heard a "drunken hookup" is a good way to prevent that. I'm not sure that I believe in "the friendzone" as anything other than "the girl doesn't fancy me". It's not a place where a girl puts me. She either fancies me or she doesn't, and from there she either agrees to go on a date with me or she doesn't. She could change her mind later (in either direction). But, anyway, if you're looking to experiment with drunken hookups then you need to be in places where there are drunk people, and perhaps have a few drinks yourself. Is that something you're prepared to do, or are we in fantasy-land? Does your employer hold a christmas party? Sometimes that's a place for drunk hookups, although dating a cow-orker has it's own pitfalls.
mammamia1 Posted November 18, 2011 Posted November 18, 2011 Getting a girl drunk isn't gonna help you win a woman's heart. Agreed with this. I'm a 20-something years old girl. I would say the drink may help you get sex with woman, but it's not gonna be great sex and unlikely that she will see you twice or take you seriously.
the wizard Posted November 18, 2011 Posted November 18, 2011 Why would you want to win the heart of a woman who gave up the goods drunkenly to a stranger? Such filth.
Teknoe Posted November 18, 2011 Posted November 18, 2011 As disturbing as this thread has been, and for those of you who are saying "Stop complaining, this stuff happens all the time!" that still doesn't make it right. Anyone with enough logic can see SD81 is heading toward a slippery slope. Thankfully though... Ok. So if you don't go to clubs and bars and you don't go to or host parties then the only options for having a drink with a girl are when you go on a date with her (eg to a restaurant), but requires you to ask her on a date and her to accept - and I'm guessing you're struggling with one or both of those. Drunken hookups happen at places where people get drunk... and you're not going to these places... so I don't think it's going to happen. Pretty sure his own fears and insecurities will never allow him to get to that point of making a bad alcohol-woman related mistake. For once, his own fears will be doing him a favor.
Feelsgoodman Posted November 18, 2011 Posted November 18, 2011 Let me put it this way: alcohol is as much the key to hooking up with women as gasoline is the key to riding a motorcycle. On a side note, if alcohol is like gasoline, cocaine is like liquid hydrogen rocket fuel (ever wonder why drug dealers are always surrounded with hot chicks?) Not that I'm advocating drug use, etc etc.
Wolf18 Posted November 18, 2011 Posted November 18, 2011 Let me put it this way: alcohol is as much the key to hooking up with women as gasoline is the key to riding a motorcycle. On a side note, if alcohol is like gasoline, cocaine is like liquid hydrogen rocket fuel (ever wonder why drug dealers are always surrounded with hot chicks?) Not that I'm advocating drug use, etc etc. I was going to post this earlier but wasn't sure if it was appropriate on a more G-rated forum like this. He who has the cocaine, by default has the chicks Just last week I snuck into a yuppie bar party and they had all these gorgeous women (Who outnumbered the men, you'll never see that in a bar) getting coked out of their minds with the guys groping them LOL. It's a sour world, but it works. Just watch yourself for the chicks that want to use you for the drugs and don't put out.
jobaba Posted November 18, 2011 Posted November 18, 2011 I was going to post this earlier but wasn't sure if it was appropriate on a more G-rated forum like this. He who has the cocaine, by default has the chicks Just last week I snuck into a yuppie bar party and they had all these gorgeous women (Who outnumbered the men, you'll never see that in a bar) getting coked out of their minds with the guys groping them LOL. It's a sour world, but it works. Just watch yourself for the chicks that want to use you for the drugs and don't put out. Yea. Wolf makes a valid point. Drug dealers get chicks. I've seen women make out with men they had no attraction to and were even repulsed by for weed. If it were a more addictive and sensual substance like heroin, coke, or X, then you might get to do some pretty hardcore stuff with some pretty hot chicks. But ... you also risk getting your a@@ thrown into jail, where sexual attraction will take on a whole new meaning.
carhill Posted November 19, 2011 Posted November 19, 2011 Alcohol had much more 'cachet' during prohibition when it was illegal. Many drugs, being illegal, have an element of 'danger' to them, relevant to getting 'busted' and that stimulates adrenalin response, in addition to the mind-altering affects of the drug itself. Alcohol a woman can get anywhere easily and legally, hence a typical man has no cachet by buying her a drink. Move that interaction into the illegal realm and watch out. I saw this a lot back in the 80's with coke and in the 70's with MJ and LSD. It was interesting to see how popular the guy with the drugs was, even if he was for all intents and purposes a 'regular' guy. Anyway, I doubt that path would bring the OP any compatible 'fruit'.
Wolf18 Posted November 19, 2011 Posted November 19, 2011 Yea. Wolf makes a valid point. Drug dealers get chicks. I've seen women make out with men they had no attraction to and were even repulsed by for weed. If it were a more addictive and sensual substance like heroin, coke, or X, then you might get to do some pretty hardcore stuff with some pretty hot chicks. But ... you also risk getting your a@@ thrown into jail, where sexual attraction will take on a whole new meaning. Too bad going to prison only makes you much hotter to women. I've been in jail, in county there's no gay rape if that's what you're referring to. Not even at the infamous Rikers Island. People with sentences under a year have no reason to risk it, it's when you go to federal where people are doing 15-30-Life sentences where this type of activity happens. My 14 year old nephew the other day asked me for advice on attracting women. I said "Become a serial killer" .
Woggle Posted November 19, 2011 Posted November 19, 2011 If a guy has the drugs he can be the ugliest man in the world and still get women. I have never in my life known a drug dealer that couldn't get almost any woman he wanted. The risk of jail or death is not worth it to me but I can very much understand the allure of that lifestyle. For a brief moment you truly are on top of the world.
Ilovewater Posted November 19, 2011 Posted November 19, 2011 Too bad going to prison only makes you much hotter to women. I've been in jail, in county there's no gay rape if that's what you're referring to. Not even at the infamous Rikers Island. People with sentences under a year have no reason to risk it, it's when you go to federal where people are doing 15-30-Life sentences where this type of activity happens. My 14 year old nephew the other day asked me for advice on attracting women. I said "Become a serial killer" . The question is, do you want to attract women who are attracted to criminals anyways? Obviously, these women have deep issues and are unlikely to be suitable partners anyways. There are tons of women out there who aren't attracted to such men.
El Brujo Posted November 19, 2011 Posted November 19, 2011 There is a reason why big-time criminals attract women. Say no to one of these guys, and you'll likely end up wearing wings and playing a harp. But to keep the thread on topic... I very rarely drink (never enough to get even a buzz), but as a kind of joke, I recently bought one of those little stainless steel flasks like the kind you see people in speakeasies use... next time I go to a singles meetup and I'm in the middle of a convo with some woman I'm really not interested in, I'll whip that puppy out of my pocket and chug the contents right in front of her... it will be full of water, but I'll lie and tell her it's Everclear. Although... this gag may backfire if she demands that I let her take a swig... But, seriously... in L.A.'s Chinatown, there's a trading company that I visit every few months to buy candy and gewgaws, they sell 1/2-pint flasks of this stuff called Red Star sorghum vodka from China... the label says it's 112 proof. Cheers!
PlumPrincess Posted November 19, 2011 Posted November 19, 2011 If a guy has the drugs he can be the ugliest man in the world and still get women. I have never in my life known a drug dealer that couldn't get almost any woman he wanted. The risk of jail or death is not worth it to me but I can very much understand the allure of that lifestyle. For a brief moment you truly are on top of the world. He's attracting junkies.
Feelsgoodman Posted November 19, 2011 Posted November 19, 2011 Alcohol had much more 'cachet' during prohibition when it was illegal. Many drugs, being illegal, have an element of 'danger' to them, relevant to getting 'busted' and that stimulates adrenalin response, in addition to the mind-altering affects of the drug itself. Alcohol a woman can get anywhere easily and legally, hence a typical man has no cachet by buying her a drink. Move that interaction into the illegal realm and watch out. I saw this a lot back in the 80's with coke and in the 70's with MJ and LSD. It was interesting to see how popular the guy with the drugs was, even if he was for all intents and purposes a 'regular' guy. Anyway, I doubt that path would bring the OP any compatible 'fruit'. It's not so much about cachet than about having "connections" to obtain the illegal substances. These connections usually want something in return, either in the form of a large amount of money...or certain "favors".
Feelsgoodman Posted November 19, 2011 Posted November 19, 2011 The question is, do you want to attract women who are attracted to criminals anyways? Obviously, these women have deep issues and are unlikely to be suitable partners anyways. There are tons of women out there who aren't attracted to such men. Pretty much all women nowadays have "deep issues" of one form or another. Just read this forum.
oaks Posted November 19, 2011 Posted November 19, 2011 Pretty much all women nowadays have "deep issues" of one form or another. Just read this forum. I'm not sure that I would be confident in forming an opinion about "pretty much all women" by observing only women on this forum. They aren't exactly representative of the general population. (same goes for the men, for similar reasons)
Feelsgoodman Posted November 19, 2011 Posted November 19, 2011 I'm not sure that I would be confident in forming an opinion about "pretty much all women" by observing only women on this forum. They aren't exactly representative of the general population. (same goes for the men, for similar reasons) Fair enough...I would replace "pretty much all women" with "most women". I recently read in an article that 25% of all females in North America are on psychiatric drugs. That's just women with diagnosed, serious mental health issues that require medical intervention. And for every medicated patient, you've got three or four undiagnosed, run of the mill crazies.
dasein Posted November 19, 2011 Posted November 19, 2011 Tek was only offering advice, gained from his similar experience. Call it advice all you want, looks like plain badgering to me. I don't know the history of either poster and frankly don't care. It's one thing to call someone out on their BS, but there's more than that going on here.
Teknoe Posted November 19, 2011 Posted November 19, 2011 Call it advice all you want, looks like plain badgering to me. I don't know the history of either poster and frankly don't care. It's one thing to call someone out on their BS, but there's more than that going on here. I have been SomeDude81 not long ago. Literally. In his same exact shoes. I learned how to enjoy myself and life over the past couple years. You'd think he'd be wise to AT LEAST half-consider the suggestions not only I, but many others, have given him. He shoots down every idea. It's just weird. You ask for advice, or you open yourself for some, and then you refuse to try any of it. Maybe he should start a blog instead.
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