spinaroonie Posted November 10, 2011 Posted November 10, 2011 (edited) Lots of examples here of guys chasing girls and getting nowhere. Not much of the opposite. Here's a text change my buddy had recently with a girl he met off a day game cold approach on campus. This girl is about a 7. The initial interaction was no longer about 10 minutes and he gets her number. Friday Oct 7, 2011 Michael (9:38 PM): so I told Chris what you’d said, he’s in tears but he agrees. I should hire you as my therapist how was the rest of your day Joanne (11:15:55 PM): Lol tht depends … How much r u willing to pay me? As for the rest of my day, well it didnt go exactly as planned … I was trying to get on a bus to get home but thr wasnt exactly possible XD How was ur day? Sunday, Oct 9, 2011 Michael (9:22 AM): lol you missed the bus. Aww, are you still in (town)? My weekend’s been great, and I had THE best dessert. Joanne (12:54 PM): I didnt miss the bus, I just couldnt tolerate standing in line forever & thn sit in a cramp bus. I took the sat morn bus instead. What did u have for dessert? Tuesday, Oct 11, 2011 Joanne (7:02 PM): Hey havent heard frm u in a bit … How was ur thanksgiving wkd? Michael (8:21 PM): I had a great Thanksgiving weekend spending it with family and friends. How about you? Joanne (8:29 PM): Me too. Went up to the cottage, enjoyed the warm weather & the vibrant fall colors. Spent as much time as I could outdoors. Michael (9:02 PM): I like texting, but chatting face to face is so much better. Let’s meet up this week. Is tomorrow good for you or is Wed better. Joanne (9:10: PM): Lol … Tmr is Wed Michael (9:12 PM): I’m glad you’re paying attention. Gold star. Alright meet me tomorrow at Williams at the University Plaza at 7pm Joanne (9:33 PM): Kk. Cya thr tmr at 7. Michael (9:34 PM): Yep see you at 7 Wednesday, Oct 12, 2011 Michael (7:02 PM): Hey! Let me know when you’re here Joanne (7:04 PM): B thr in 5 Friday Oct 14, 2011 Joanne (2:39 PM): Hey ya, its been great seeing u again last Wed (thanks for the hot chocolate & the ride back home) … Hope all is well … TC Saturday Oct 15, 2011 Michael (10:55 AM): Joanne! I had fun. We should go out for some good times again soon. Ttys Joanne (9:35 PM): Sure … u got a place in mind? Monday Oct 17, 2011 Michael (9:24:29 PM): Joanne, let’s go to my personal favourite gelato place. It’s phenominal. Then we can relax at my place. Tuesday Oct 18, 2011 Joanne (11:54:50 AM): Umm … Sounds yummy! U have a date in mind? Thursday Oct 20, 2011 Joanne (6:39:09 PM): Hey Gelato Man, havent heard frm ya in a while, how ya been? Michael (6:41:30 PM): Excellent! I was about to contact you. How’s Sunday for meeting up. Joanne (11:11:43 PM): Sundays great … It the only day of the wk tht I dont have anything else to do … It will work out perfectly … Do u have a time in mind? Fri Oct 21, 2011 Joanne (9:52:23 PM): Hey u still good for Sun? I got other ppl fighting for my time n I need to kno wat to tell thm Saturday Oct 22, 2011 Michael (6:52:23 AM): Go with your friends, it turns out I have a cousin’s baptism on sunday unfortunately. Let’s meet up after the weekend instead. Have fun! Joanne (4:16:20 PM): Alright, enjoy the baptism … So do u wanna meet up mid wk or nxt wkd? Tuesday Oct 25, 2011 Joanne (9:07:14 PM): Sooo how was the baptism? Wednesday Oct 26, 2011 Michael (10:50:24 PM): Hey! Really good. Are you around Friday evening to meet up? Thursday Oct 27, 2011 Joanne (1:43:45 AM): Hahaha … N here I was begining to think tht u didnt survive bc how long it took u to respond … Friday im free btw 1-4pm, Sat free b4 8pm & Sun all day Michael (10:34:18 PM): Haha let’s meet up Sat afternoon. What’s your address again? I’ll pick you up. I’ll text before coming. Friday Oct 28, 2011 Joanne (12:16:04 AM): Its [address] … What time can I expect u? Michael (6:17:18 PM): 2pm tomorrow. I had a great day at work and I’m happy it’s Friday. Joanne (6:20:39 PM): Tell me all bout it tmr Saturday Oct 29, 2011 Michael (1:14:55 PM): It will be fun. See you shortly! Joanne (1:19:52 PM): He ends up banging her that afternoon. It's amazing how much SHE was chasing HIM. All he had to do was not screw it up, and he played it perfectly with just the right amount of coyness and aloofness. An example of solid text game. She's a 26 year old Polish-Canadian with a Polish accent if that makes a difference. Perhaps Eastern European girls are more upfront and play less games than regular American/Canadian girls? Very refreshing when a girl is so open and genuine about her interest. Edited November 10, 2011 by spinaroonie
oaks Posted November 10, 2011 Posted November 10, 2011 Sounds like he isn't interested, and she's keen. Why wouldn't be reply a little sooner? I wonder if she'll be on here next week saying "i slept with him and now he doesn't call".
smudge21 Posted November 10, 2011 Posted November 10, 2011 Have to admit, I enjoyed reading all that and it did remind me of a some of my own text battles in the past, but they were due to me not being initially interested and so the girl was doing most of the work. The same can be said here.
Negative Nancy Posted November 10, 2011 Posted November 10, 2011 Why wouldn't be reply a little sooner? I was wondering about the exact same thing and I think it was part of his "game" to not reply sooner. What a turn-off. If a guy did that to me - and with his texts it becomes obvious that he did not that because he REALLY had some other stuff to do, but out of calculation - I would drop him faster than a hot potato. I hate those kind of games and either a man is interested and shows it and things will flow naturally or we're not meant to be. Thank god I don't have to deal with that.
Andy_K Posted November 10, 2011 Posted November 10, 2011 It took him three weeks to get her into bed, and she was only a 7. That is not particularly impressive. He could have done it in under a week without the bull****, she was interested enough from the start.
USMCHokie Posted November 10, 2011 Posted November 10, 2011 It took him three weeks to get her into bed, and she was only a 7. That is not particularly impressive. He could have done it in under a week without the bull****, she was interested enough from the start. Agreed. Michael sounds like a douche and Joanne sounds like an idiot without much else going for her. If a girl is attracted to crap like that, then that's just plain unfortunate. Desperate times call for desperate measures...?
Kamille Posted November 10, 2011 Posted November 10, 2011 Agreed. Michael sounds like a douche and Joanne sounds like an idiot without much else going for her. If a girl is attracted to crap like that, then that's just plain unfortunate. Desperate times call for desperate measures...? So, in essence, you're judging a girl for going after what she wants? The next paragraph isn't specific to Hokie's post: Women can't win now, can they? We chase, we're desperate. We don't chase, we're stuck up game-playing princesses who are responsible for all the bitterness levied at them on the internet.
Author spinaroonie Posted November 10, 2011 Author Posted November 10, 2011 Agreed. Michael sounds like a douche and Joanne sounds like an idiot without much else going for her. If a girl is attracted to crap like that, then that's just plain unfortunate. Desperate times call for desperate measures...? He's a young professional, she's a graduate student. How is he a douche? What crap?
USMCHokie Posted November 10, 2011 Posted November 10, 2011 So, in essence, you're judging a girl for going after what she wants? No, I'm not. I'm judging her for tolerating such blatantly inconsiderate behavior. And it's commendable that she is willing to go after what she wants, but if it's going after such low quality, well that's on her...she'd better not complain about it later... Women can't win now, can they? We chase, we're desperate. We don't chase, we're stuck up game-playing princesses who are responsible for all the bitterness levied at them on the internet. Again, it has nothing to do with her assertiveness and everything to do with douchebag...
Emilia Posted November 10, 2011 Posted November 10, 2011 So, in essence, you're judging a girl for going after what she wants? The next paragraph isn't specific to Hokie's post: Women can't win now, can they? We chase, we're desperate. We don't chase, we're stuck up game-playing princesses who are responsible for all the bitterness levied at them on the internet. I think it's more about how you go after what you want. It is absolutely fine for a woman to make clear that she wants sex from a man. That's different however from pushing for contact from someone who doesn't appear to return the same interest. That goes both for men and women.
USMCHokie Posted November 10, 2011 Posted November 10, 2011 He's a young professional, she's a graduate student. How is he a douche? What crap? Standard turnaround for any correspondence is 24 hours. Taking longer than that either means he's inconsiderate and lazy, or if he's legitimately that busy, then I would consider him undateable. But maybe my standards are too high...
SingleinSouth Posted November 10, 2011 Posted November 10, 2011 Standard turnaround for any correspondence is 24 hours. Taking longer than that either means he's inconsiderate and lazy, or if he's legitimately that busy, then I would consider him undateable. But maybe my standards are too high... No, your standards are not too high. I don't know what is the matter with her, but he didn't return her texts! I would not have bothered and I don't care HOW horny I was, I wouldn't have hung in there like she did.
zengirl Posted November 10, 2011 Posted November 10, 2011 Besides all the previous comments, what I find hilarious is: Are guys actually showing each other their texts and analyzing their game together now? That sounds so . . . weird. "Hey, buddy, I banged this girl! Look at 3 weeks of our text conversation." For some reason, that whole idea is hilarious to me. And yes, this girl was interested from the get-go (and while I'm not quite as angry in my judgment of her as Hokie seems to be, I do have to question WHY she's interested). He would've closed the deal a lot sooner had he not been an idiot. If a girl is that interested in you, then you don't scare her away by texting her back politely. Never happened. Maybe by smothering her via texts and asking about her every move, but I'm hoping normal people have the common sense to see a middle ground.
Author spinaroonie Posted November 10, 2011 Author Posted November 10, 2011 (edited) Standard turnaround for any correspondence is 24 hours. Taking longer than that either means he's inconsiderate and lazy, or if he's legitimately that busy, then I would consider him undateable. But maybe my standards are too high... Not sure if you're a dude or a chick. He might seem lazy and inconsiderate when doing a cold, dispassionate read of his texts, but it comes across much differently to women when they're already attracted and their emotions are involved. If Brad Pitt asked you out, would you dismiss him because he took 36 hours to respond instead of 24? Edited November 10, 2011 by spinaroonie
Beachgirl8 Posted November 10, 2011 Posted November 10, 2011 If the purpose of his texting is to make her feel unbalanced and insecure, then I'd say mission accomplished. But any girl with sef confidence and common sense would not keep texting repeatedly when he neglected to answer direct questions and dropped text conversations multiple times.
stillafool Posted November 10, 2011 Posted November 10, 2011 I think that young lady should have stopped after the first time he didn't respond to her. I wish women would teach their daughters not to chase. She came across as desperate. It's so sad.
Author spinaroonie Posted November 10, 2011 Author Posted November 10, 2011 If the purpose of his texting is to make her feel unbalanced and insecure, then I'd say mission accomplished. But any girl with sef confidence and common sense would not keep texting repeatedly when he neglected to answer direct questions and dropped text conversations multiple times. Or maybe she, uh, really liked him? Guys can learn from this. The main thing to remember with texting is that a guy will get FAR BETTER results by being "rude" i.e. ignoring her questions, stopping midway through conversations, taking forever to respond, or sending vague non sequitur messages. Asking her how her day went, etc. before she's invested in you will not make you stand out. Having absolutely piss poor texting "manners" will, however. Girls do this to guys all the time. Incorporate a little of a typical girl's flakiness into your text game and guys will see better results. There are numerous examples of guys here who had initial interest, but blew it because they started texting too much, or came across as too needy/too available and the girl began to lose interest. We all want what we can't have. Girls love a challenge. Girls like to feel like they've won a guy over. Being aloof and coy works. Actions belie words.
USMCHokie Posted November 10, 2011 Posted November 10, 2011 Not sure if you're a dude or a chick. He might seem lazy and inconsiderate when doing a cold, dispassionate read of his texts, but it comes across much differently to women when they're already attracted and their emotions are involved. If Brad Pitt asked you out, would you dismiss him because he took 36 hours to respond instead of 24? Doesn't matter whether I'm a dude or a girl...inconsiderate is inconsiderate. And if a girl lets her emotions guide her that far off track, then that's too bad. As beachgirl said, it's one thing to disregard silly texts that don't really require responses, but to completely ignore a text asking a direct question related to date planning...that is just plain rude...or selfish at best... And if Kate Beckinsale played this game with me, I wouldn't play. And I'd hope it wouldn't take 24 hours anyway. The initial stages are when you should be putting your best foot forward. If this is the best your friend has to offer, then that's just too bad...can't imagine how much worse it would get...
Emilia Posted November 10, 2011 Posted November 10, 2011 Being aloof and coy works. Actions belie words. God not another one of these.... It works only if you are after just sex and you don't care what quality women you get it from ie this kind of attitude works with girls that have low self-esteem, probably not stunning beautiful and need a lot of external validation.
Emilia Posted November 10, 2011 Posted November 10, 2011 And when Men chase, it's OK that they look desperate? No-one needs to chase. You can show very strong interest in someone as a first step to see whether it's mutual. If they are being aloof with you and treat you badly, you should walk away regardless whether you are male or female
snowflakes88 Posted November 10, 2011 Posted November 10, 2011 If the purpose of his texting is to make her feel unbalanced and insecure, then I'd say mission accomplished. But any girl with sef confidence and common sense would not keep texting repeatedly when he neglected to answer direct questions and dropped text conversations multiple times. Exactly. Again, the only kinds of girls you'll pick up using this "method" are the ones with low self-esteem who rely on external validation. Any woman worth her salt would have stopped initiating contact with him early on in that exchange. I definitely would have.
Frogwife Posted November 10, 2011 Posted November 10, 2011 Besides all the previous comments, what I find hilarious is: Are guys actually showing each other their texts and analyzing their game together now? That sounds so . . . weird. "Hey, buddy, I banged this girl! Look at 3 weeks of our text conversation." For some reason, that whole idea is hilarious to me. Yes, they are doing this! I stumbled across this "Don Juan wannabe" site a few months ago and it's been a hilariously eye-opening look at men! (the following thread may look VERY familiar...) http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=189176
Author spinaroonie Posted November 10, 2011 Author Posted November 10, 2011 Ladies - would you rather a guy who comes off a little aloof and distant, and feel like you've won him over? Or would you rather a guy who texts and responds right away?
stillafool Posted November 10, 2011 Posted November 10, 2011 And when Men chase, it's OK that they look desperate? No. It should be a mutual attraction. When someone wants to spend time with you they get back to you right away.
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