lolcatz Posted November 10, 2011 Posted November 10, 2011 Will it work after my ex broke up with me? Reasons behind it is because she is stressed with school (first year). I'm 20 and she's 18. Thanks.
betterdeal Posted November 10, 2011 Posted November 10, 2011 It'll help you draw a line between her and the past you shared, and you and the future you're about to have.
Author lolcatz Posted November 10, 2011 Author Posted November 10, 2011 Think she will contact me first or should I initiate the first contact?
betterdeal Posted November 10, 2011 Posted November 10, 2011 What do you want to happen? Give it a month, see if you feel like getting back in touch then.
Author lolcatz Posted November 10, 2011 Author Posted November 10, 2011 I miss her very much. It's been two-three weeks since we've last spoke. I am not sure if I should keep this NC going or stop hesitating and talk to her. Thoughts?
brokenheart3 Posted November 11, 2011 Posted November 11, 2011 I think you should contact her. I think no contact should be done and sticked to when needing time to get over an ex. No contact is for only yourself. And I'd tell you to stick to it, but that's only if you don't want her anymore. If you still want to have something with her, then I think that you should contact them. I just think its wrong to use no contact to get someone to miss you, because usually, that usually ends wrong, because if you still want them, all no contact does is distance yourself from them. I made the stupid mistake of going no contact, when I didn't want things to be over, and yes it'll make them wonder what your up to. But if you want to fix the friendship, talking to them helps, having contact helps.
HonestMan Posted November 11, 2011 Posted November 11, 2011 I highly recommend NO CONTACT Do you want to convince her to get back? Or do you want her to convince herself and then get back to you Especially if she knows how you feel- your attempts wont help they will only push her away NO CONTACT If she initiates it- go for it
Rorschach64 Posted November 11, 2011 Posted November 11, 2011 Do what honestman says, if and only if you made every attempt to get back together and she knows that you want her back. If you constantly contact her even after you make an all attempt assault trying to get her back then you are just looking weak and pathetic. Why do you want to settle for less than what you desire from this person? Why do you want to constantly put yourself out there towards a person that probably has not made any attempt to make contact you, which to me would show she does not love or care about you? If she starts talking to you it is another story but most of the time they come back for ego boosts and wanting to know that their security blanket is still there for them.
ChelseaLS Posted November 11, 2011 Posted November 11, 2011 Do what honestman says, if and only if you made every attempt to get back together and she knows that you want her back. If you constantly contact her even after you make an all attempt assault trying to get her back then you are just looking weak and pathetic. Why do you want to settle for less than what you desire from this person? Why do you want to constantly put yourself out there towards a person that probably has not made any attempt to make contact you, which to me would show she does not love or care about you? If she starts talking to you it is another story but most of the time they come back for ego boosts and wanting to know that their security blanket is still there for them. I am torn on this one. NC is great for healing your pain. BUT I also feel NC = out of sight out of mind. Thats just me.. I love, love.
Rorschach64 Posted November 11, 2011 Posted November 11, 2011 Well that's your opinion chelsea but think about it like this.... You sat there, gave it your everything in your intellectual and emotional capablities to salvage the relationship and were only met with heavy resistance, what then? Clearly the person doesn't want you around anymore so you go NC for a few months. You decide to I dunno write a letter to your ex saying no hard feelings you made mistakes, you regret the relationship ended, no hate, and wishing the best for the ex. No response and the silence continues from there on out. What does that tell you? It would tell me that your only sound logical option is to continue NC and any further attempts to bring up a new relationship would be all for naught since the other person doesn't seem to care about you or have any love for you. Each situation is different, I understand that-like yours chelsea I know your best option is LC, but if this guy's ex hasn't said crap to him since NC has started I am willing to bet she is totally happy with him being gone.
ChelseaLS Posted November 11, 2011 Posted November 11, 2011 Well that's your opinion chelsea but think about it like this.... You sat there, gave it your everything in your intellectual and emotional capablities to salvage the relationship and were only met with heavy resistance, what then? Clearly the person doesn't want you around anymore so you go NC for a few months. You decide to I dunno write a letter to your ex saying no hard feelings you made mistakes, you regret the relationship ended, no hate, and wishing the best for the ex. No response and the silence continues from there on out. What does that tell you? It would tell me that your only sound logical option is to continue NC and any further attempts to bring up a new relationship would be all for naught since the other person doesn't seem to care about you or have any love for you. Each situation is different, I understand that-like yours chelsea I know your best option is LC, but if this guy's ex hasn't said crap to him since NC has started I am willing to bet she is totally happy with him being gone. Makes sense, but we don't know the back story here... or do we? Did I miss it? I dont know who broke up with who, what the circumstances are... etc.
Rorschach64 Posted November 11, 2011 Posted November 11, 2011 You're right we don't know the story and how things have been from the break up to now.
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