Sivok Posted November 10, 2011 Posted November 10, 2011 Hey everyone, I can't help it. There's this girl at my part time job who is absolutely gorgeous. I've crushed hard on her since the first time I met her last spring. I'm not a guy who isn't experienced with women, but the effect this girl has on me is unreal. I became so uncomfortable around her, couldn't look her in the eyes, and couldn't hold normal conversation for the life of me - I was way too nervous each time i talked to her. Towards the end of summer, I tried asking her out and was met with a rejection... It was super awkward . Granted, I knew the timing was wrong as I wasn't comfortable around her at all, but I didn't know when I would see her next so I went for it... Anyway, fast forward a few months and it's the week before Halloween. I just performed a scene for my acting midterm, felt really good about it, and was on this confidence high. I went into work, she was sitting near me, I struck up ~real~ conversation for the first time with her and it went amazingly well. Not only was she beautiful, but I found out she had many other great qualities about her: 1) She's studying Engineering (like me). She's a sophomore, I'm a senior. 2) She immigrated from the Mediterranean the same time I did (when we were both 2). 3) She's very much into her culture and family. I share the same values. 4) She's not a crazy partier. Neither am I. 5) We both commute. And it came out we live only one town away from each other. Since that conversation, all the following times we worked together, she sat and initiated convo with me. We'd share laughs, she'd ask me alot of questions about Engineering, questions at work, and I poked fun of her a little bit which she reacted well to. Last time we worked together and were talking, I noticed she was playing with her hair with her legs crossed and shaking alot. No idea if that's body language for "I dig you yo". Issue is, I'm nervous asking her out again because I don't want to hit two rejections... Especially now that I feel we have a strong connection and I can't get her out of my head. I'm going to try and fight every fiber of that feeling and ask her out anyway. Do you think I'm reading these signs from her right? It sounds like she might be into me too but... ****! I'm nervous and want to make sure I'm not delusional! Help! Give me some reassurance or tell me I'm walking into a mine field! TL;DR Have a crush on girl at work, think she likes me too. Want to ask her out but nervous. Help!
jobaba Posted November 10, 2011 Posted November 10, 2011 Hey everyone, I can't help it. There's this girl at my part time job who is absolutely gorgeous. I've crushed hard on her since the first time I met her last spring. I'm not a guy who isn't experienced with women, but the effect this girl has on me is unreal. I became so uncomfortable around her, couldn't look her in the eyes, and couldn't hold normal conversation for the life of me - I was way too nervous each time i talked to her. Towards the end of summer, I tried asking her out and was met with a rejection... It was super awkward . Granted, I knew the timing was wrong as I wasn't comfortable around her at all, but I didn't know when I would see her next so I went for it... Anyway, fast forward a few months and it's the week before Halloween. I just performed a scene for my acting midterm, felt really good about it, and was on this confidence high. I went into work, she was sitting near me, I struck up ~real~ conversation for the first time with her and it went amazingly well. Not only was she beautiful, but I found out she had many other great qualities about her: 1) She's studying Engineering (like me). She's a sophomore, I'm a senior. 2) She immigrated from the Mediterranean the same time I did (when we were both 2). 3) She's very much into her culture and family. I share the same values. 4) She's not a crazy partier. Neither am I. 5) We both commute. And it came out we live only one town away from each other. Since that conversation, all the following times we worked together, she sat and initiated convo with me. We'd share laughs, she'd ask me alot of questions about Engineering, questions at work, and I poked fun of her a little bit which she reacted well to. Last time we worked together and were talking, I noticed she was playing with her hair with her legs crossed and shaking alot. No idea if that's body language for "I dig you yo". Issue is, I'm nervous asking her out again because I don't want to hit two rejections... Especially now that I feel we have a strong connection and I can't get her out of my head. I'm going to try and fight every fiber of that feeling and ask her out anyway. Do you think I'm reading these signs from her right? It sounds like she might be into me too but... ****! I'm nervous and want to make sure I'm not delusional! Help! Give me some reassurance or tell me I'm walking into a mine field! TL;DR Have a crush on girl at work, think she likes me too. Want to ask her out but nervous. Help! The signals don't matter. Obviously, if she's telling everybody at work how obnoxious and ugly you are, she's not into you. But every generic signal of female interest has turned into rejection for me before. But, I digress... It seems to me you've gone too far to turn back now. I would never allow myself to get so heavily invested in someone who didn't have a reciprocal interest (and she's already rejected you before) or at least I will never again. People say regret is way worse than rejection. As someone who has encountered both on a monumental scale in the past year and a half, I'm not so sure about that. Anyway, it looks like you are hellbent on doing it, so good luck bud!
Author Sivok Posted November 10, 2011 Author Posted November 10, 2011 Well, the interest recently is mostly due to reciprocating interest. We've been flirting a good degree the past two weeks, and I'm pretty sure I'm not imagining it. Your post did put things a bit more into perspective and grounded me some, thanks.
jobaba Posted November 10, 2011 Posted November 10, 2011 (edited) Well, the interest recently is mostly due to reciprocating interest. We've been flirting a good degree the past two weeks, and I'm pretty sure I'm not imagining it. Your post did put things a bit more into perspective and grounded me some, thanks. Every time I have been gaga over a woman (in a pre-relationship platonic or crush stage) it has always resulted in rejection. Maybe that would explain the pessimistic tone. But I am just one man. And a lot of men with experience will tell you temper your investment. But, like I said before, it's too late for you now. And about the signals I'm sure of that. I could write chapters on times I've misinterpreted a woman's friendliness for interest. Nothing she says or does means she has interest in you short of blatant sexual come-ons, kissing you, or telling you, "Hey. I like you." Emotions make our eyes see what they want to see. Or part of it might be women flirting to boost their ego. Edited November 10, 2011 by jobaba
Author Sivok Posted November 10, 2011 Author Posted November 10, 2011 Civil Engineering?computer And I guess you're right, jo. I might be reading too much into it. I graduate in a month anyway so no awkward work encounters if I ask her again. Regret eats me much more than rejection. Rejection is part of the game, it doesn't really phase me much.
Dust Posted November 10, 2011 Posted November 10, 2011 computer And I guess you're right, jo. I might be reading too much into it. I graduate in a month anyway so no awkward work encounters if I ask her again. Regret eats me much more than rejection. Rejection is part of the game, it doesn't really phase me much. What does a computer engineer do? Engineer computers hahah. How hot can she be with that major... I'm kiding of course I'm sure that only makes her hotter to you. I say go for it! Don't just ask her out. Tell you're going to fck her hard and bite her tits!
rubberhedgehog Posted November 10, 2011 Posted November 10, 2011 Regrets are a lot worse than rejections - there are a few people that I missed out on (only to find out later that they were interested in a relationship with me) - because I was afraid of rejection. Let us know how it goes!
Author Sivok Posted November 17, 2011 Author Posted November 17, 2011 Update: So, I didn't ask her out the next day mostly because of the ridiculous amount of overhyping I did. I was way too nervous and the vibe was wrong. Fast forward to yesterday. I took the weekend to reframe my mind and I had nice conversation with her yesterday. I did end up asking her out, but apparently she's a jehova's witness... Yeah. I guess when things are too good to be true, they usually are.
Recommended Posts