JengleBells83 Posted November 9, 2011 Share Posted November 9, 2011 My ex and I were friends for 2 years prior to us dating- he was so awesome and fun- the greatest guy- and we dated for about 4 months, till the end of summer. Things went south the last 2 weeks of the relationship--he had depression issues, and i was dealing with crazy hormones and the death of my grandfather. He cried for 2 hours over the phone, called it a "break", then began dating a girl 12 years his junior that he worked with 4 DAYS LATER. That was 2.5 months ago almost. About mid October, I was at a bar he works at, and i knew he wouldnt be there that night. Lo and behold, thru the grapevine he hears that i'm there and shows up, saying NOTHING to me. I send him a few texts here and there, no response. I also was feeling all emotions on Halloween and sent him a text that said i love you, hope you want to talk soon. yikes. This past weekend, my friend (who was also his very good friend, she introduced us) wanted to go to the bar that he works at, so we did. He ignored me, I tried to talk to him, he met his girlfriend out in the parking lot JUST as I went out to smoke, and were all lovey dovey right in front of me. later that night, he sends my friend a text saying she shouldnt bring me around his parts anymore and that he really wants nothing to do with me. i woke up and just kind of told him how much hes hurt me, etc., no response. That same night, he makes a facebook post that says this: "Dear Ex girfriends, you earned that "ex". get over it. I'm happy and in love with my girlfriend". So fast forward to last night, just kind of random, out of the blue, aat about 1am, he sends me this: "So here's your closure. I'm happy. Don't call me, don't text me. and when i see you, you are just another person on the street. Done. over." I didnt respond. How can someone who proclaims every chance he can how "happy" he is, be so bitter and angry and mean STILL? he always said he wanted to be my friend, then he turns like this. This truly is not the guy i always knew for 3 years - the old him would have NEVER even dreamed of treating me so bad. So, Whats with the bitterness/ anger? Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted November 9, 2011 Share Posted November 9, 2011 What a doucher... He's probably not over it... Link to post Share on other sites
Lucky_One Posted November 9, 2011 Share Posted November 9, 2011 It's only 2.5 months ago. He might not like the drama that your presence makes his GF bring up. He might feel very hurt about things that you did during the R. And then you keep showing up and texting him, and he is trying to show you and tell you that he doesn't want you in his life. I would stay out of his space. And I would quit texting him. And I would unfriend him on FB. You aren't friends any longer; quit asking him to be that guy again. Link to post Share on other sites
raymondebontrager Posted November 11, 2011 Share Posted November 11, 2011 My ex and I were friends for 2 years prior to us dating- he was so awesome and fun- the greatest guy- and we dated for about 4 months, till the end of summer. Things went south the last 2 weeks of the relationship--he had depression issues, and i was dealing with crazy hormones and the death of my grandfather. He cried for 2 hours over the phone, called it a "break", then began dating a girl 12 years his junior that he worked with 4 DAYS LATER. That was 2.5 months ago almost. About mid October, I was at a bar he works at, and i knew he wouldnt be there that night. Lo and behold, thru the grapevine he hears that i'm there and shows up, saying NOTHING to me. I send him a few texts here and there, no response. I also was feeling all emotions on Halloween and sent him a text that said i love you, hope you want to talk soon. yikes. This past weekend, my friend (who was also his very good friend, she introduced us) wanted to go to the bar that he works at, so we did. He ignored me, I tried to talk to him, he met his girlfriend out in the parking lot JUST as I went out to smoke, and were all lovey dovey right in front of me. later that night, he sends my friend a text saying she shouldnt bring me around his parts anymore and that he really wants nothing to do with me. i woke up and just kind of told him how much hes hurt me, etc., no response. That same night, he makes a facebook post that says this: "Dear Ex girfriends, you earned that "ex". get over it. I'm happy and in love with my girlfriend". So fast forward to last night, just kind of random, out of the blue, aat about 1am, he sends me this: "So here's your closure. I'm happy. Don't call me, don't text me. and when i see you, you are just another person on the street. Done. over." I didnt respond. How can someone who proclaims every chance he can how "happy" he is, be so bitter and angry and mean STILL? he always said he wanted to be my friend, then he turns like this. This truly is not the guy i always knew for 3 years - the old him would have NEVER even dreamed of treating me so bad. So, Whats with the bitterness/ anger? Hey you heard already what he want you to understand..that's why start to look someone new now then date someone..do the same what he do...ignored him anyways put attention to your friends, family or even a new guy. Link to post Share on other sites
ChelseaLS Posted November 11, 2011 Share Posted November 11, 2011 Hey you heard already what he want you to understand..that's why start to look someone new now then date someone..do the same what he do...ignored him anyways put attention to your friends, family or even a new guy. I don;t know how long you guys have been apart, but I would not suggest looking for a new guy as of yet, if its fairly new. That will just be a rebound and those never work and someone always gets hurt... Yes to the spend your time with family and friends, lean on them, make sure you get out, work on yourself, learn new things. Link to post Share on other sites
Author JengleBells83 Posted November 11, 2011 Author Share Posted November 11, 2011 Can anyone provide any insight as to why he is STILL so angry and bitter at me? Link to post Share on other sites
nature Posted November 11, 2011 Share Posted November 11, 2011 I sense he is irritated that you go to the bar he works at. He feels smothered by it, regardless of it being a public place and you having a right to be there. when i break up with someone, I avoid them for a long time after just out of respect for privacy, etc. So he feels you are intruding on his space, where he works, where he wants his new girlfriend to come. That is how i see it. I remember breaking up with a guy and he'd show up everywhere I went. It drove me insane. I saw him as desperate and stalkerish. It wreaked of him having low self esteem. During relationships, people always throw out the term "let's stay friends after" but this never usually happens until a few years after the breakup that you actually can be friends. Your ex sounds like he just wants to move on with his life and not deal with you right now so it irritates him that you come around. Perhaps you should find a new hangout spot for the next few months. Maybe in a few years you can be friends again. But right now it kind of looks like you are not over him by showing up there, and that's what he's thinking. Link to post Share on other sites
Rorschach64 Posted November 11, 2011 Share Posted November 11, 2011 Jeng, Does it really matter if you find the answers or not? I promise it will only raise MORE questions that you will most likely drive you nuts. What I suggest you do for yourself is NC this person and heal....it will take a long time and don't date anyone for awhile, take the time to reflect on yourself and on the relationship so you can grow stronger and better. Gym it up, go have fun, go to school, and live your life....you just a new one. Link to post Share on other sites
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