nevadagirl Posted November 9, 2011 Posted November 9, 2011 Hi...so. Basically. The ex and I have been done for about two months. I think he's really over it and while I was getting over it (or at least feeling a lot better) he continued to email me every single week and try to "chat" or be friends or who knows. I ignored it until he put his whole Great New Life on a dating profile and intentionally visited mine so he'd show up in my "visitors". (This was absolutely not necessary because he had messaged me on that site from a blank profile with a different name so he already knew all of the Nothing I had on my dumb dating profile) From there I finally broke down and looked at his facebook (which was totally public, shocking!) and well...you know. =\ On impulse I contacted him...I know that's all he wanted because as soon as I talked to him he didn't seem to care one way or the other if I was talking to him. He'd changed his whole life in a matter of weeks and while it sucks that I was so easy to get over I feel I've taken a thousand steps backward. I acted like I didn't care or was hurt but come on? I feel really embarrassed by this. I wish to God I'd just said nothing but a broken hearted girl can only take so much. Some of my girlfriends want to go out Saturday night. But the area we'd be out in is an area he may potentially/possibly/be out in but I mean I don't know because I've made a very serious commitment to not knowing about his life - or as best as I can without completely moving into a cave without internet access. I feel incredibly nervous and afraid of running into him. Because he'd be out with a girl, and I'm only out with some girlfriends. I already got the Great New Life online...I think seeing it in person would be so horrible. I know I'm being a little ridiculous because what are the odds, like really? But...I half feel like Fate is ****ing with me and it'll just happen. I don't want to be a downer because where we want to go out has some cool clubs and bars and I know I shouldn't be afraid to Live My Life but I am just filled with a lot of anxiety. Any comforting advice?
HateLove Posted November 10, 2011 Posted November 10, 2011 First off, remember that you really have no idea how quickly he's over you, I don't think online activity can really get that across. Even if you saw him with another girl he might put on a show and you might feel jealous, but for all you know the girl he's with is a one time date whom he'll never see again. The point is, you don't know. When you talked, you acted like you didn't care too, so he might have been thinking the same about you and was putting on a show as well. But, as I'm sure we both know, whether he's over you or not shouldn't matter. Do you still have feelings for him? If so, maybe you should just be honest with him, and if he still doesn't seem interested, then go hard core NC. No facebook, no bars he frequents, no nothing. I know how you feel, though. My recent ex frequents some of the places I do, and there have been a few times I've been worried to see her, even one time when I had a date. It is a bad feeling. I think the best thing to do is avoid, avoid, avoid. It has the potential to drive a person crazy.
penshelly Posted November 10, 2011 Posted November 10, 2011 Don't be lost hope you have to chill up, there's still so many person in our word who deserve you, You deserve to be happy, take the step of moving on! God may reserve the right person for you! Chill out!
Author nevadagirl Posted November 10, 2011 Author Posted November 10, 2011 First off, remember that you really have no idea how quickly he's over you, I don't think online activity can really get that across. Even if you saw him with another girl he might put on a show and you might feel jealous, but for all you know the girl he's with is a one time date whom he'll never see again. The point is, you don't know. When you talked, you acted like you didn't care too, so he might have been thinking the same about you and was putting on a show as well. But, as I'm sure we both know, whether he's over you or not shouldn't matter. Do you still have feelings for him? If so, maybe you should just be honest with him, and if he still doesn't seem interested, then go hard core NC. No facebook, no bars he frequents, no nothing. I know how you feel, though. My recent ex frequents some of the places I do, and there have been a few times I've been worried to see her, even one time when I had a date. It is a bad feeling. I think the best thing to do is avoid, avoid, avoid. It has the potential to drive a person crazy. Hatelove (great name by the way haha) - He's over me. His Great New Life included a trip to visit his ex girlfriend, someone I was very insecure about for a large part of our relationship because he wouldn't Leave Her Alone (similar to what he did to me after we broke up, see) and they took pictures together and had a Great Time and well he put it all on facebook and made it PUBLIC. I had his FB blocked but after he dangled little tidbits on his stupid dating profile I just couldn't resist looking. It was incredibly painful to see how much fun he's having without me. Anyway in the conversation he pretty much admitted he wa just lonely and prone to impulse...but really hoped we could be friend...meh. What a jerk.
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