Neo Posted May 21, 2004 Posted May 21, 2004 A girl I met (Jen), who also accepted my invitation to prom, is one that I wish to have as my girlfriend. She smiles at me all the time, invites me to her house (and her mom's wedding reception; she could only invite one guest)... so I figure these are signs of affection. Her friends tell me she talks of me all the time in a very giddy/happy mood, and that she does indeed like me. However, today, one of my friends who spoke with her told me their convo went something like this: Friend: Do you like him? Would you say yes if he asked you out? Jen: I am not sure. I met him like right after my last breakup. I am having self-doubts. It's fun to flirt with him and all but I am thinking that this affection is to fill up what was left from my last breakup Friend: That's BS, the way you act when you talk about him... you don't speak of him as a filler. Jen: You think so...? He is pretty cool... So my question is. Apparently now she is having doubts about me asking her out. She supposedly said she'd say yes if I asked her because "that's just how she is", but I want to know perhaps what is really going on here.
LILUIL Posted May 22, 2004 Posted May 22, 2004 IMO I dont think just because a person has recently gone through a break up that we should take a vote if one month or 6 months is long enough before starting a relationship with them. from what i've read in your post, she seems to think highly of you to some extend and the interest shows. she's questioning herself coz she's trying to find the answers in herself whether this is right or wrong. She needs to do that on her own. be a companion to her and help her find herself in all this. listen to her when she talks, hang out, whatever. tell her you dont want to pressure her into doing anything (relationship) and that you will respect whatever her decision. listen to how she answers that. then, ask her what does she like about you and you should tell her what you like about her. see where that goes. these are small steps. the way she's so unsure and rather confused, if you push her too hard she'll make a run for it.
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