quietGuy13 Posted November 8, 2011 Posted November 8, 2011 I'm latino. and i'm not the typical party type. I'm quiet, shy, bad speaker. unsuccessful ( but trying to find jobs and get better BUT apparently that doesn't matter to women) I"ve been noticing that alot of white women and asian women are super educated with degrees etc and they would never ever date me. From what i got from women in dating sites and in real life..Educated White and Asian women either want White guys, or Guys who are CEOs etc of high tech companies. Fact is most White and Asian women seem to think nowadays that guys have to have TECH CMPUTER/ENGINEEERING type of jobs to be any worth. Even saw Anderson cooper show, and the women made fun and did not want to even make smalltalk with the guy at the Meat department just cause of the kind of job he had ( later they found he was the manager and made 3 figures.. but they didn't even want to find more about him just because of his job) **** Time and time again, i've also heard how these Educated women love guys who have social lives. It seems high social life is very important to these women because usually that's the kind of men that are wealthy and living the life of luxury. They want to travel, they want to be outgoing and have that kind of lifestyle. That's why, whenever you see Asians or White women with latinos.. the guy is a typical club type guy. When have you ever seen A highly educated Asian or White woman with a poor laborer latino..? who by the way works really hard....apparently that doesn't matter. Women, just want high teckie type Entrepeneurs or whatever....cause in this modern society that's the image of success that is pushed onto them. The other thing is that they're embarrased about mingling with Latinos who don't fit the stereotype of a true American--> Great english, great social skills..perfect or fluent english. Well even if they guys are not english speakers, as long as they speak their native language perfectly and fluently..women won't feel as embarrased about dating that guy. They feel embarrased if their guy is like me, slow...and bad speaker. ANyways, I've been trying to find Asian GF or an American GF but from what i've seen it's kind of impossible. PS. well it's the same for latina girls and black girls. They too care too much about the guy's job and his social status. But I'm just saing about White and Asians cause they're typically the ones that get more higher education and have higher economic level....and i just feel they think i'm crap.
PlumPrincess Posted November 8, 2011 Posted November 8, 2011 Well, would you date a Latina girl who was your female counterpart in regards to education, income, social life, etc.?
Cracker Jack Posted November 8, 2011 Posted November 8, 2011 I could've swore you said you were asian.
insertnamehere Posted November 8, 2011 Posted November 8, 2011 These are the facts of life, dood. Women tend to marry men of a status slightly above them. They generally don't marry men of a status significantly below them.
Pierre Posted November 8, 2011 Posted November 8, 2011 I'm latino. and i'm not the typical party type. I'm quiet, shy, bad speaker. unsuccessful ( but trying to find jobs and get better BUT apparently that doesn't matter to women) I"ve been noticing that alot of white women and asian women are super educated with degrees etc and they would never ever date me. From what i got from women in dating sites and in real life..Educated White and Asian women either want White guys, or Guys who are CEOs etc of high tech companies. Fact is most White and Asian women seem to think nowadays that guys have to have TECH CMPUTER/ENGINEEERING type of jobs to be any worth. Even saw Anderson cooper show, and the women made fun and did not want to even make smalltalk with the guy at the Meat department just cause of the kind of job he had ( later they found he was the manager and made 3 figures.. but they didn't even want to find more about him just because of his job) **** Time and time again, i've also heard how these Educated women love guys who have social lives. It seems high social life is very important to these women because usually that's the kind of men that are wealthy and living the life of luxury. They want to travel, they want to be outgoing and have that kind of lifestyle. That's why, whenever you see Asians or White women with latinos.. the guy is a typical club type guy. When have you ever seen A highly educated Asian or White woman with a poor laborer latino..? who by the way works really hard....apparently that doesn't matter. Women, just want high teckie type Entrepeneurs or whatever....cause in this modern society that's the image of success that is pushed onto them. The other thing is that they're embarrased about mingling with Latinos who don't fit the stereotype of a true American--> Great english, great social skills..perfect or fluent english. Well even if they guys are not english speakers, as long as they speak their native language perfectly and fluently..women won't feel as embarrased about dating that guy. They feel embarrased if their guy is like me, slow...and bad speaker. ANyways, I've been trying to find Asian GF or an American GF but from what i've seen it's kind of impossible. PS. well it's the same for latina girls and black girls. They too care too much about the guy's job and his social status. But I'm just saing about White and Asians cause they're typically the ones that get more higher education and have higher economic level....and i just feel they think i'm crap. Sorry about that. Hispanic males are seen as blue collar types that often assimilate into the US black culture. OTOH, I know an Argentinian guy that is white and a high earner. He is a ladies man, women love him everywhere he goes. I suggest you become more educated, polish your looks and try not to act ghetto.
oaks Posted November 8, 2011 Posted November 8, 2011 I'm latino. and i'm not the typical party type. I'm quiet, shy, bad speaker. unsuccessful ( but trying to find jobs and get better BUT apparently that doesn't matter to women) In your case, having read this and your other threads, I think the things giving you difficulty in getting a date are the "quiet, shy, bad speaker" bits more than being "unsuccessful" or "latino". I suspect the "quiet, shy, bad speaker" stuff is also why you're "unsuccessful" in employment, too. Consequently, I think that you'll see the biggest improvement in your ability to get dates if you focus on those things, rather than worrying about being latino (which clearly you can't change). I'm not sure how much you can improve the way you speak - you don't talk about what, specifically, causes you this problem (and you don't have to) - but you sure as heck can't change your ethnicity so own it and work with what you've got, and work at changing the things you can. Is it fair that white girls don't want to date latinos with average jobs? I don't know, but this isn't your biggest problem. Sorry.
The Way I Am Posted November 8, 2011 Posted November 8, 2011 People want to date people they have things in common with. As a software engineer, I'm going to have very little to talk about with someone who works at a grocery store and spends most of his free time skateboarding. (Not exactly your example, but it's an example of why a relationship in my personal experience didn't work out.) It doesn't matter what race I am or what race he is. If he's not on the same level as me and doesn't have the same interests, there's no point wasting both of our time with something that ultimately won't work out. Even the reverse is true. Not many educated and successful men are going to be going after a woman who hands them their food across the deli counter. (Unless the woman is gorgeous. But I doubt a really attractive man would have much problem getting dates in that situation either.) And all that aside, you don't have to be "the club type". You do have to have something to bring to the table though. Enjoying sitting around your house and never talking to anyone isn't attractive to most people of either sex. It's also hard to meet people when you don't get out and do things. So start getting out and looking for women who are interested in the things you like or try to change yourself into the type of person you think women want. The first is easier, but the second is always an option.
Ruby Slippers Posted November 8, 2011 Posted November 8, 2011 I have dated some guys less "successful" than me over the past year, including some Latino men. I never realized it before, but I think Latino men in particular are very sexy. Yep, it's all that fiery passion stuff. The stereotype tends to hold true. In general, they seem to have more progressive attitudes about women and equal opportunity, which I love. As long as he can support himself and is going for what he wants in life, I don't care who is more "successful". The problem is that most men seem threatened if I am making more money. There are the few gems who are confident and not threatened by my success, and who also don't seem to be looking for a sugar mama. I could be very happy with a lower-earning or blue-collar guy who is confident, strong, stable, loving, and supportive of me. If he genuinely loved me, and supported me fully without trying to tear me down out of jealousy, I would have no problem contributing some of my resulting wealth for our mutual enjoyment.
insertnamehere Posted November 8, 2011 Posted November 8, 2011 Hispanic males are seen as blue collar types that often assimilate into the US black culture. Huh? US government statistics indicate that Hispanics heavily integrate into white America. Frankly, if we're going to get into racist stereotypes, you can't throw "blue collar" in with "US black". The statistical abstract of Hispanic Americans suggests that Hispanics are far more heavily suburbanized than any race, even whites. The most recent census data suggests that a large number of Hispanics are simply ticking off "white" on the form, causing a marked and unexpected rise in the white population. Hispanic-to-white integration is so pervasive in the US that most demographers believe the Census will discontinue the use of the Hispanic label sometime between 2030 and 2050, due to declining usage. American Hispanics have hopped the same demographic train to whiteness that southern Europeans took in the early 1900s. Any time the whiteness of America is threatened, we just assimilate the next nearest group and resume being a white nation. Sorry for the rant on racial identity, but there's zero evidence that Hispanics integrate with some TV stereotype of the black hood. Hispanic assimilation in America is probably best represented on a show like Desperate Housewives than all the awful police procedurals.
Pierre Posted November 8, 2011 Posted November 8, 2011 Huh? US government statistics indicate that Hispanics heavily integrate into white America. Frankly, if we're going to get into racist stereotypes, you can't throw "blue collar" in with "US black". The statistical abstract of Hispanic Americans suggests that Hispanics are far more heavily suburbanized than any race, even whites. The most recent census data suggests that a large number of Hispanics are simply ticking off "white" on the form, causing a marked and unexpected rise in the white population. Hispanic-to-white integration is so pervasive in the US that most demographers believe the Census will discontinue the use of the Hispanic label sometime between 2030 and 2050, due to declining usage. American Hispanics have hopped the same demographic train to whiteness that southern Europeans took in the early 1900s. Any time the whiteness of America is threatened, we just assimilate the next nearest group and resume being a white nation. Sorry for the rant on racial identity, but there's zero evidence that Hispanics integrate with some TV stereotype of the black hood. Hispanic assimilation in America is probably best represented on a show like Desperate Housewives than all the awful police procedurals. It all depends on the area where you look. I will also admit that one cannot generalize. Hispanic is not a race but a group of races from Spanish speaking countries. Some are black whereas many are indigenous and similar to American Indians who by the way came from Asia. Many others are of European ancestry (more evident in some countries, but not all). In New York city I saw low education poor hispanics emulate the black community whereas Argentinians and Cubans are pretty much like the Anglos in other cities. Many Hispanics mark themselves as white in the census and hence they use the Hispanic white and non-Hispanic white categories. But, you may be correct, the Hispanics could be the Italians of 100 years ago. I don't know where OP falls in the Hispanic spectrum, but I assume he is probably blue collar and indigenous to latin america. Therefore, he will have trouble dating women of other racial groups..
Zed Posted November 8, 2011 Posted November 8, 2011 Huh? US government statistics indicate that Hispanics heavily integrate into white America. Frankly, if we're going to get into racist stereotypes, you can't throw "blue collar" in with "US black". The statistical abstract of Hispanic Americans suggests that Hispanics are far more heavily suburbanized than any race, even whites. The most recent census data suggests that a large number of Hispanics are simply ticking off "white" on the form, causing a marked and unexpected rise in the white population. Hispanic-to-white integration is so pervasive in the US that most demographers believe the Census will discontinue the use of the Hispanic label sometime between 2030 and 2050, due to declining usage. American Hispanics have hopped the same demographic train to whiteness that southern Europeans took in the early 1900s. Any time the whiteness of America is threatened, we just assimilate the next nearest group and resume being a white nation. Sorry for the rant on racial identity, but there's zero evidence that Hispanics integrate with some TV stereotype of the black hood. Hispanic assimilation in America is probably best represented on a show like Desperate Housewives than all the awful police procedurals. Agree--perfectly succinct and correct. There are a subset of Afro Latinos, but those who identify as that are ridiculously small compared to Latinos that do identify as White. By a wide margin, many who have no African Blood, see themselves as white with country of origin as part of their ethnicity. Even those who may look Black would be insulted to be categorized as having anything in common with Black Americans. In New York City I saw low education poor Hispanics emulate the black community whereas Argentineans and Cubans are pretty much like the Anglos in other cities. That is a small subset of Dominicans--who have the highest admixture of Black blood among Hispanics and the second group would be Puerto Ricans. And the only reason you may have seen them in the Bronx area because there is a history of them living together. That dynamic is no different then blue collar Italians and Irish living together in Brooklyn. If you would pull a Dominican or Puerto Rican and ask them if they identify with Black the answer would be no. They would rather identify as Taino or Spanish then to be Black-- which is perfectly fine. There identity is their own.
FitChick Posted November 8, 2011 Posted November 8, 2011 There are plenty of illegal Latinas just as uneducated and unsuccessful as the OP. Some are very attractive. Don't set your sights too high. I'll bet a lot of them would let you have sex with them so they could have an "anchor baby." There 's hope for you yet!
Feelin Frisky Posted November 8, 2011 Posted November 8, 2011 QG, none of that matters. You don't get all women, you get one if you're lucky. What did you do with the one that enjoys your company that you've talked about? Nothing yet? Nothing is ever going to happen one way or the other if you don't maximize the potentials that come your way. You often sound like you're contriving reasons to feel sorry for yourself and excuse yourself from trying. Most women pass on me and I can speak, am tall and American white. I can't compete with every man out there and we all get old too. So, don't worry so much about these big picture generalities that come to you through the media. Just make whatever chances you find in your immediate life count--and I'm still waiting to hear if you held that girl's hand.
PlumPrincess Posted November 8, 2011 Posted November 8, 2011 There are plenty of illegal Latinas just as uneducated and unsuccessful as the OP. Some are very attractive. Don't set your sights too high. I'll bet a lot of them would let you have sex with them so they could have an "anchor baby." There 's hope for you yet! That sounds pretty racist!
Cracker Jack Posted November 8, 2011 Posted November 8, 2011 There are plenty of illegal Latinas just as uneducated and unsuccessful as the OP. Some are very attractive. Don't set your sights too high. I'll bet a lot of them would let you have sex with them so they could have an "anchor baby." There 's hope for you yet! Really, what's the point of this post? That's some nasty stuff to say to someone.
Jane2011 Posted November 9, 2011 Posted November 9, 2011 Um well, I'm an Asian female with a Master's degree and many of my past boyfriends have been Hispanic. Let's see...they've been (since I was 20 and started having boyfriends at all) Hispanic, no college degree Hispanic, no college degree White, college degree Filipino guy, working on degree White, working on degree Half White / half Lebanese, college degree Hispanic, no degree Hispanic, college degree Hispanic, working on degree White, no degree White, college degree I just started seeing an Indian guy. My first Indian person... The guy I was with the longest was a Hispanic guy who had a college degree. Was with him for five and a half years.
Lucky_One Posted November 9, 2011 Posted November 9, 2011 Quiet_Guy, if you spent as much time working with the exercises the speech therapist gave you as you do about worrying about generalizations like this and like MTV sex stats, then you would increase your chances of meeting a woman who likes you for who you are.
Author quietGuy13 Posted November 11, 2011 Author Posted November 11, 2011 I've seen tons of latinos and i'm one so i'm around the latino communities, The only ones with White or Asian wives or GFs are the ones that went to University and have an Engineering job or whatever and were talktaive outgoing type of guys. or even if they didn't go to college but if they were all outgoing and assmilated to the American culture then they can get asian or white Gfs. But The percentage of latino guys who are "good enough" in the mind of White and Asian women...is very low. And so white and Asian women are not interested. And it's even worse for me because I don't do anything that typical americans do. I'm just a shy guy and antisocial and bad speaker so I have even less chance.
Lucky_One Posted November 11, 2011 Posted November 11, 2011 Quiet_Guy, if you spent as much time working with the exercises the speech therapist gave you as you do about worrying about generalizations like this and like MTV sex stats, then you would increase your chances of meeting a woman who likes you for who you are. Repost. :bunny:
oaks Posted November 11, 2011 Posted November 11, 2011 And it's even worse for me because I don't do anything that typical americans do. I'm just a shy guy and antisocial and bad speaker so I have even less chance. Do you want things to change? What are you doing about it? What are you prepared to do about it? ...besides whining, of course.
Author quietGuy13 Posted November 11, 2011 Author Posted November 11, 2011 "Do you want things to change? What are you doing about it? What are you prepared to do about it? ...besides whining, of course." There's nothing i can do about it. I'm just stating the facts. it would help if White & Asian women didn't care so much about the man's status but that is not gonna change.
oaks Posted November 11, 2011 Posted November 11, 2011 "Do you want things to change? What are you doing about it? What are you prepared to do about it? ...besides whining, of course." There's nothing i can do about it. I'm just stating the facts. I'll try to remember that when reading your posts in future.
Mrlonelyone Posted November 11, 2011 Posted November 11, 2011 We should have One Goal and Quiet guy exchange half of eachothers brains. Taken together they would have the confidence to ask TONS of hot women out, and would give up after a max of three tries.
allina Posted November 11, 2011 Posted November 11, 2011 I don't get it. Why do you think that a woman who is educated, employed and outgoing should want to date a man who is uneducated, unemployed, has no social life, and is unable to live the life of an adult male. Race has nothing to do with it.
PlumPrincess Posted November 11, 2011 Posted November 11, 2011 "Do you want things to change? What are you doing about it? What are you prepared to do about it? ...besides whining, of course." There's nothing i can do about it. I'm just stating the facts. it would help if White & Asian women didn't care so much about the man's status but that is not gonna change. Why don't you go and work on your status? Why are they supposed to change? And why are you looking for women with a higher status than you and demand that they like guys with lower status? What kind of attitude is that?? No wonder, no woman wants to date you. You are too lazy to change anything about yourself and you sit on your butt expecting that these women who worked hard to get where they are force themselves to like you and your lazy attitude.
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