He doesn't respect NC - Long.

[Wings Of Love]

It has been a long time since my ex and I split, nearly 3 years! I'm in a much better place now than I was back then, but I still have setbacks. When he first left, I am ashamed to say I begged him for months to give me another chance. But finally I realised how stupid that was and started NC. It felt so good, and this lasted about 13 months. He would occasionally try to contact me, but I ignored it.

 

Then in June last year he split with another of his girlfriends, and immediately sought me out on my old Myspace (I had blocked him on Facebook). Just days later I checked Myspace and found a friend request from him. Needless to say I ignored it. But then he emailed me. We got talking and eventually started meeting up again. One night, he kissed me. My head was all over the place, but over the next few days he told me he was falling for me again. Eventually, I fell into bed with him. He left soon after and I've been kicking myself ever since. We continued to spend some time together afterwards, but apart from the odd kiss, nothing else happened. This became too much and finally I cut off all contact again without warning him. A few weeks later he called me, and when I answered, I only heard him laughing with some girl. It was probably an accident, but it upset me. Since then, I have occasionally received texts and calls from mysterious numbers. I'm unsure if it is him, but everyone else I know has my newer number.

 

Anyway, around June this year, I found out my ex had cheated on me multiple times when we were still together. That just served to reinforce my determination not to have anything more to do with him. I deleted my old social network accounts, blocked him, all his family and his friends that I once got on with and changed my email address and phone number. I believed that would be the end of it, and I got on with my life.

 

Not long ago, I decided to join Google+. I never really used it though. A few nights ago (the 4th of November, incidentally what would have been our 4 year anniversary) I checked my old email account as I was searching for an old article I had once typed out and saved in my Drafts. Lo and behold, my ex has sent a request to add me on Google+. Naturally I ignored it, but it got to me. Of all days, why that one?

 

He has done this so many times, all of which seem to be just after he breaks up/gets into a relationship with another girl. He is now with someone else and has been for about 3 months, something I found out by accident. But really, I am the one with lingering feelings, not him. And yet he is the one to check up on me. He once admitted to creating a second Facebook account to "make sure I was doing ok". I have blocked him in every way I know how and he still continues to disrespect my NC and randomly add me on different sites. What is he playing at?

[MarMarMar]

I have no clue what he's playing at but don't talk to him. Whether he's playing games, misses you, or whatever that's not the way to go about having any kind of connection with you. Don't answer calls unless you know where the number is from and block him everywhere and make all your profiles as private as you can.

[Mallow]

He has done this so many times, all of which seem to be just after he breaks up/gets into a relationship with another girl.

 

Your answer is here.

 

He's trying to keep you around to fall back on. Everytime something goes wrong with one of his ex's, he sneaks back in.

 

Don't let him come back into your life. Stick to NC, keep igoring his emails, advances, and social networking. Keep moving on.

 

He doesn't respect you, don't give him the time of day, you deserve better than this.

[wilsonx]

It has been a long time since my ex and I split, nearly 3 years! I'm in a much better place now than I was back then, but I still have setbacks. When he first left, I am ashamed to say I begged him for months to give me another chance. But finally I realised how stupid that was and started NC. It felt so good, and this lasted about 13 months. He would occasionally try to contact me, but I ignored it.

 

Then in June last year he split with another of his girlfriends, and immediately sought me out on my old Myspace (I had blocked him on Facebook). Just days later I checked Myspace and found a friend request from him. Needless to say I ignored it. But then he emailed me. We got talking and eventually started meeting up again. One night, he kissed me. My head was all over the place, but over the next few days he told me he was falling for me again. Eventually, I fell into bed with him. He left soon after and I've been kicking myself ever since. We continued to spend some time together afterwards, but apart from the odd kiss, nothing else happened. This became too much and finally I cut off all contact again without warning him. A few weeks later he called me, and when I answered, I only heard him laughing with some girl. It was probably an accident, but it upset me. Since then, I have occasionally received texts and calls from mysterious numbers. I'm unsure if it is him, but everyone else I know has my newer number.

 

Anyway, around June this year, I found out my ex had cheated on me multiple times when we were still together. That just served to reinforce my determination not to have anything more to do with him. I deleted my old social network accounts, blocked him, all his family and his friends that I once got on with and changed my email address and phone number. I believed that would be the end of it, and I got on with my life.

 

Not long ago, I decided to join Google+. I never really used it though. A few nights ago (the 4th of November, incidentally what would have been our 4 year anniversary) I checked my old email account as I was searching for an old article I had once typed out and saved in my Drafts. Lo and behold, my ex has sent a request to add me on Google+. Naturally I ignored it, but it got to me. Of all days, why that one?

 

He has done this so many times, all of which seem to be just after he breaks up/gets into a relationship with another girl. He is now with someone else and has been for about 3 months, something I found out by accident. But really, I am the one with lingering feelings, not him. And yet he is the one to check up on me. He once admitted to creating a second Facebook account to "make sure I was doing ok". I have blocked him in every way I know how and he still continues to disrespect my NC and randomly add me on different sites. What is he playing at?

 

Wow this sucks... one thing ive learned from my experience is history repeats itself, have to let him go and get back in that place

[Wings Of Love]

UPDATE:

 

So I found out today that on Sunday, my ex decided to add my 14 year old sister via a mobile messaging service that I don't have. The two of them never really got on. She showed my parents who urged her to decline and to keep it from me, knowing it would upset me. My mother then told my closest friend who has always been fiercely protective of me. She decided she wasn't going to stand back and watch me suffer anymore, and sent my ex a message asking him politely to stop trying to add me or any of my family. He replied the following day saying he had never attempted to in the first place and that he wouldn't because I had "cost him a friendship". I can see why he believes this, but it is untrue. Said friend informed me he wanted nothing more to do with my ex after he caught him flirting with his girlfriend.

 

My friend told him that she didn't care for the details, but she wanted him to back off and leave both me and my family alone. To his credit, he apologised for any pain he may have caused and just said "sure" when she asked if this was the end of it. I'm hoping he has got the message.

 

I have been told now that Google+ might be able to add people from you email address book. This is likely the case, but I believe he should have removed that email now. And adding my sister makes no sense. He was always irritated by her, so it can't be that he missed her. How he got hold of her phone details I'm not sure, as the phone she uses is new, along with the SIM card.

 

Long story short, I'm trying so hard to put my past behind me, where it belongs. But he's making it so difficult. I spent most of today thinking dark thoughts, trembling with anger and feeling sick. Some of my friends and family believe he still feels a connection with me, others think he merely wants me as a safety net for when his relationships fail and the rest think he's just confused. I'm leaning more towards the second option considering he has yet another girlfriend, but I don't know. All I want is for him to leave me alone, but I don't feel it's worth breaking more than a year of NC just to tell him that.