Carmelseren Posted November 6, 2011 Posted November 6, 2011 Hi all, my girlfriend of 15 months broke up with me last Monday, she feels I pushed her away and she gave me lots of chances to mend my ways. The problem I had was when we met I never told her iwas married, we got Turku this as I was in the process of getting divorced, I fel guilt towards my wife and 3 year old boy and so would spend each night doing his bath and then at 9 pm going to my flat to be with my gf. Back in July I took my ex wife and little boy on holiday just purely to give my boy a family holiday there was no emotional feeling from me to my wife. My gf found out and I broke her heart, we have stayed together but she says she has not previously had the strength to end it, it has taken 4 months for her to do so. I have found out that she met a guy in Sept during a week in las Vegas and nothing happened but they have been talking on the phone. She is very hurt T the moment and I'm worried this guy will use all the male tricks to sweet talk her like "you deserve someone better , let me take you out for dinner etc. She has told me that she has told him she will not go on any dates until she knows where she is in her head, I think I believe her, but obviously have some doubts, we were so much in love and she literally did everything for me. Since she ended it with me I have bought her an expensive watch 2 bunches of flowers and a friendship ring we have met3 times this week for dinner and to finally get her to spend some time with my little boy. am I correct in thinking that the fact she came out for the day to spend time with me and my boy means there's a realistic chance we can mend things? She texted me later to say she really really enjoyed the time we all spent together and it's a shame we didn't do this 6 months earlier, I have showered with my emotions told her so many times how much I love her and how I would never make the same mistakes. She says she knows I love her but "right now" she oes not love me anymore, she says she needs space to decide what she wants, she has told me to go out and have fun, which I find odd to be fair. Is sh worth hanging on for and if so how long is reasonable 2 weeks a month6 weeks. I think 6 weeks max for her to eiter tell me there is no chance or we try and begin things slowly again almost going back to when we first dated. I would appreciate some honest feedback, I've been as honest as I can, also I'm hating thinking about her all the time, I can't sleep and I'm not feeling to hungry, what's the best way to move forward please, Thanks everyone
Author Carmelseren Posted November 6, 2011 Author Posted November 6, 2011 Yes really do you have any advce please Thanks
ChelseaLS Posted November 6, 2011 Posted November 6, 2011 She doesn't trust you, and is not sure she should trust you again. She is being honest when she says she needs to figure **** out because she doesn't know if she can be with you after you failed to tell her about such a HUGE thing, plus it's weird you took the ex wife on a vacation. I see taking your son, but not the ex. That screens to the girl you had, that you're clearly not over the ex. There was no need to take the ex wife. I too would have broken up with you. I understand you were trying to give your son a sense of family, but it doesn't have to be with the ex wife. You have a lot of work to do if you plan on the gf ever trusting you again. But I believe that if you do honestly care, stop the lying, you may have a chance.
Author Carmelseren Posted November 6, 2011 Author Posted November 6, 2011 Thanks Chelsea, I just need to find a way back in, I guess there must be a chance as she has agred to spend time with me and my son, she also wants to get to know him, she text me today to ask if he had a nice time with all of us yesterday, I know she is hurting, is 6 weeks long enough for me to wait or am I being optimistic?
ChelseaLS Posted November 6, 2011 Posted November 6, 2011 I wouldn't go by any time line.. It could take a long time or it could also never happen. Just go slow and proceed as you guys are now. Let her reach out to you otherwise you will just smother any last embers of the relationship. She needs to feel comfortable trusting you and only she will know when she does, so don't go by specific time sets.
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