ffw Posted November 5, 2011 Posted November 5, 2011 You have to approach based on the circumstances. If she waiting for a bus/train, ask for the time to catch a particular train or did u miss one. If she is sitting in a park, talk about weather & silly stuff. Most probabily she will know it. If she is interested, she will continue talking or she will make some excuses.
Beachgirl8 Posted November 5, 2011 Posted November 5, 2011 I really like this question! Yes, cold approach generally results in a "no". But, you never know, it's good practice, and might result in a fun conversation with a pretty girl. At worst it will result in a funny story for later. Experiment!
Nexus One Posted November 5, 2011 Posted November 5, 2011 (edited) Personally I wouldn't talk about the weather, because that makes my stomach cringe, because it's so superficial. I'd probably do it like this while walking by the bench and stopping dead in my tracks: Me: Hi. Her: Hi. Me: *stops dead in his tracks* Hey I saw you sitting there and to be honest you kind of caught my eye, so I'm wondering what your name is. Her: I'm Noa. Me: Hi I'm Nexus. Me: Your name wasn't the only thing I was wondering about to be honest. Are you single? *smile* Her: Yes. (if she says no, then have some sort of joke ready and let it slide off of you in a laid back manner. Then wish her a nice day and move on.) Me: Hey in case you're not seeing anyone, you want to exchange numbers? Because I'd like to take you out on a date sometime to get to know you better. *passes phone to her* Her: *types in number* Me: Thanks, here's my card in case you want to contact me. Me: *Calls her number to store it in my cell's phone book and to check if she didn't make a mistake or gave a fake number* This is a direct approach and it's not for everyone, it might not even work for everyone. And some girls/women might even get startled by it. So some women might not even know what to say. In that case I could say for example: "I'll tell you what, I'll give you my card and if you change your mind, then give me a call or e-mail me and we'll take it from there. Hey have a nice day." Edited November 5, 2011 by Nexus One
Wolf18 Posted November 5, 2011 Posted November 5, 2011 him being jewish and unattractive sealed the deal jewsish guys have small office gigs and most of the time big time connections to $$$ Pretty much. Also being exceptionally tall can outweigh being ugly. Another unrelated thing I'd like to say is that a lot of times in very ethno-centric, close knit communities like the Jewish one, ugly men can date attractive ones simply for cultural reasons.
Author somedude81 Posted November 5, 2011 Author Posted November 5, 2011 Personally I wouldn't talk about the weather, because that makes my stomach cringe, because it's so superficial. I'd probably do it like this while walking by the bench and stopping dead in my tracks: Me: Hi. Her: Hi. Me: *stops dead in his tracks* Hey I saw you sitting there and to be honest you kind of caught my eye, so I'm wondering what your name is. Her: I'm Noa. Me: Hi I'm Nexus. Me: Your name wasn't the only thing I was wondering about to be honest. Are you single? *smile* Her: Yes. (if she says no, then have some sort of joke ready and let it slide off of you in a laid back manner. Then wish her a nice day and move on.) Me: Hey in case you're not seeing anyone, you want to exchange numbers? Because I'd like to take you out on a date sometime to get to know you better. *passes phone to her* Her: *types in number* Me: Thanks, here's my card in case you want to contact me. Me: *Calls her number to store it in my cell's phone book and to check if she didn't make a mistake or gave a fake number* This is a direct approach and it's not for everyone, it might not even work for everyone. And some girls/women might even get startled by it. So some women might not even know what to say. In that case I could say for example: "I'll tell you what, I'll give you my card and if you change your mind, then give me a call or e-mail me and we'll take it from there. Hey have a nice day." Thanks for the details Nexus. Though it's also what I kind of expected. My guess is that, that approach would work about 5% of the time. Then there is a 1% chance the woman would ever be willing to meet up.
alphamale Posted November 5, 2011 Posted November 5, 2011 unless she was blatantly flirting with me i would continue doing what i was doing...
Author somedude81 Posted November 5, 2011 Author Posted November 5, 2011 And when I say 5%. I mean that after she says she is single, there is a 5% chance she'd give a number and assuming that the number is real.
Beachgirl8 Posted November 5, 2011 Posted November 5, 2011 5% and 1% are both better than 0% which is the exact chance of no approach.
Author somedude81 Posted November 5, 2011 Author Posted November 5, 2011 5% and 1% are both better than 0% which is the exact chance of no approach. Of course they are. If I don't kill myself first from depression before I hit that 5%. If I had to choose between having my ego crushed with a tiny sliver of hope or sitting at home, I'd rather stay inside.
Dust Posted November 5, 2011 Posted November 5, 2011 5% and 1% are both better than 0% which is the exact chance of no approach. He just makes those numbers up as he goes. Also who cares if some random girl gets anoyed or rejects him. Who cares. Somedude does. To much. Also I wouldn't recomend asking if they are single. Thats just lame.
Nexus One Posted November 5, 2011 Posted November 5, 2011 Hey, if you're really want an SO, then even hitting on a 100 girls and getting just that 1 girl will do the trick. This is what "girl hunting" basically is. Take a wingman with you if you want. The approach I described can be played out in 3 minutes tops. You could do it many times per day until someone bites. You'll get better at it in the process and will run into little things you hadn't thought about and you evolve your approach that way into your own way of doing it. Women who are single and looking for an SO, will be open for approach. They'll give you a break and won't be b*tches about it.
Nexus One Posted November 5, 2011 Posted November 5, 2011 Of course they are. If I don't kill myself first from depression before I hit that 5%. If I had to choose between having my ego crushed with a tiny sliver of hope or sitting at home, I'd rather stay inside. You can go sit in a corner and cry about it, or you could accept the reality of it, i.e. that it generally takes a a number of approaches before you meet a girl with which everything falls into place. That one is the only one the counts, the other women that rejected you or had boyfriends do not matter. The ones that rejected you could have had a 1000 possible reasons for it that didn't even have anything to do with you.
alphamale Posted November 5, 2011 Posted November 5, 2011 women choose the man so if you go into battle without any buying signals you're going to get your legs shot off
Dust Posted November 5, 2011 Posted November 5, 2011 women choose the man so if you go into battle without any buying signals you're going to get your legs shot off Yes and they do so base on action. Somedude is not a man of action. He could be if he just flips that mental switch.
counterman Posted November 5, 2011 Posted November 5, 2011 Yeah, I wouldn't ask if they're single or not. Most girls know what I want when I approach them, and if they have a boyfriend, they'll tell me. I'm confident enough to say that if she's single, that's a good chance she'll at least go out with me once to see how it goes, but some girls aren't attracted and that's fine, just like how I'm not attracted to every girl that's interested in me. If a girl rejects me, I don't really care. With this particular girl that I saw sitting alone on the bench, she was incredibly gorgeous. Most of the time, I don't know what I'm going to say until I say it. This is how that particular situation went: Me: Hi, I gotta say I love that particular [something (I forgot what it was)] you're wearing Her: Thanks! *I take a seat next to her* Me: My name is Counterman Her: My name is GorgeousGirl. So, what do you do Counterman? Me: I do man things, why don't you guess? Her: Hmmmm, okay, let's see *Takes a few guesses and gets them wrong* Me: You suck! Well, I guess it is really hard to guess just based on appearances but I bet I can guess what you do in 3 tries Her: And I bet you can't Me: *I fail* And then it went on, she spoke about her trips to overseas, her recent birthday party, her background, etc. By they way, like I said, there's no set thing that I say, really just starts with hello or hi most of the time and go from there. Anyways, it continued, I asked if she wanted to go out, she said she has a boyfriend and I'm like it's all good. It doesn't matter if this happens a lot or if I get rejected. But I'm willing to bet that if I come in being the best person I can be (and that means fully fit, with other things going on in my life going well), my chances of dating would increase dramatically. I've noticed that when I've had really shocking days and tried to approach girls, I wasn't in it and she sensed that, and things never kicked off. The thing is a lot of people get caught up in this... but you have other things going on in your life as well. Who cares if 1, 10 or 100 girls reject you, your value and the life you live shouldn't be based this. If you become the best person you can be, I would say that you have that attitude that you don't really give a crap what others think and that would make you more attractive.
alphamale Posted November 5, 2011 Posted November 5, 2011 Who cares if 1, 10 or 100 girls reject you, rejection is the key to success counterman, stay thirsty my friend
runner Posted November 5, 2011 Posted November 5, 2011 unless she was blatantly flirting with me i would continue doing what i was doing... yep, as an old man that's pretty much how i roll these days. but back when i was half way decent...SD- you gotta go in bold and pleasant, say something nice, be confident and lead the conversation. if she plays along after a few minutes, you're in and she wants you to ask for her number. if she acts kind of annoyed and giving you the, "wtf dude- leave me alone now" look, then close out, move on and don't take it personally.
alphamale Posted November 5, 2011 Posted November 5, 2011 yep, as an old man that's pretty much how i roll these days. but back when i was half way decent...SD- you gotta go in bold and pleasant, say something nice, be confident and lead the conversation. if she plays along after a few minutes, you're in and she wants you to ask for her number. if she acts kind of annoyed and giving you the, "wtf dude- leave me alone now" look, then close out, move on and don't take it personally. yea well you play the odds, and the odds with my method are much much better
Author somedude81 Posted November 5, 2011 Author Posted November 5, 2011 The thing is, I wouldn't have a clue what to say to a brand new girl, that could lead into her giving me a number if I asked. I also can't think of any reason why she'd ever agree to date.
runner Posted November 5, 2011 Posted November 5, 2011 yea well you play the odds, and the odds with my method are much much better i'm with you on that. but somedude could use a couple hundred more rejections. he's still hung up on that asexual chick last time i checked.
runner Posted November 5, 2011 Posted November 5, 2011 The thing is, I wouldn't have a clue what to say to a brand new girl, that could lead into her giving me a number if I asked. I also can't think of any reason why she'd ever agree to date. you know what- sometimes it actually doesn't really matter what you say. you could be reciting the friggin declaration of independence to her ! ...but if you do it in a crappy donald duck impersenation, she might actually smile a little bit and let you buy her a drink
Nexus One Posted November 5, 2011 Posted November 5, 2011 The thing is, I wouldn't have a clue what to say to a brand new girl, that could lead into her giving me a number if I asked. One example you could start out with is a compliment on something she's wearing or her hair. I only do that if I really like it though, I'm not going to fake liking what she wears. I also can't think of any reason why she'd ever agree to date. You don't have to think about that, that part is her job.
alphamale Posted November 5, 2011 Posted November 5, 2011 i'm with you on that. indeed, there is only one problem with my method - you have to be good looking.
Author somedude81 Posted November 5, 2011 Author Posted November 5, 2011 indeed, there is only one problem with my method - you have to be good looking. And if you're an average looking short guy...?
ptp Posted November 5, 2011 Posted November 5, 2011 indeed, there is only one problem with my method - you have to be good looking. come on, that is like saying there is only one problem with winning the lottery - you have to have winning ticket. If a guy is good looking then its like taking candy from a baby... The rest of us would be screwed with your method.
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