He left :( he's Back :D he's gone :\ ...back? :o disappeared again :S

[WiselyNaive]

so i have an ex who ended things since February..it was pretty abrupt and i was extremely hurt but kept in my feelings...about 3 months later we spoke for the first time..initiated by me ... he immediately wanted to fix things..cried put on the greatest act...i wanted him back too but i was still so hurt i would continue to annoy him about the way he treated me before (In hindsight i was being immature)...then he completely cut all communication with me again without us rekindling and ignored me i tried to speak to him from weeks..and he ignored all of it , another 2-3 months passed...i had decided to leave him be...his birthday recently passed and although i tried to ignore it i ended up emailing him a couple days after out of guilt...to my surprise he responded...and positively...but i started to see a pattern...once again he was so eager to get back together he was "perfect" all over again wants to fix things..willing...since i really wanted closure i spoke to him..acted like everything was fine..i do love this guy but i don't trust an inch of his body...all i want is the truth which i still don't believe i'm getting...maybe 3 days of us talking and now he has disappeared again when just the other day he said we were going to work on fixing us...haven't heard from him in a few days which is abnormal for him..no texts...hasn't been online....i just don't know whats up with this guy....i haven't tried to reach him...the only reason i can think of y he disappeared is because i told him if we were to work it out i wouldnt feel comfortable with on of his "friendships" with a female friend..he responded by saying "hmm well talk about it later :|" ...later never came...if that was the issue i still feel like he could just tell me..i wouldnt bite off his head....i know the typical.."oh just ignore him" response..but that's not what im looking for..just a little insight...whats up with this guy?...in the event that he does resume contact which i think he will...how can i make this work in my favor? even if there is no second chance..how can i end up on top? or be the one in charge and not get left with the feeling i got played i don't want revenge..i want closure...control...something that doesn't make me the weak one in all this?

[BCCA]

Closure comes from you, nobody else. You achieve closure when you decide that youre done with this rollercoaster ride, and stop getting on it.

 

As for whats up, I cant read minds so all I can offer is a guess. Im thinking he's not really as into you as he comes off, and youre a good way for him to get some attention and feel good about himself, but obviously his actions dont match his words, so youre not getting the truth.

 

If you cant trust him, like you said, than whats the point here? I mean, what does coming out on top mean to you? The best revenge is success, and you dont need him for that.