Plaid Posted November 4, 2011 Posted November 4, 2011 Here's the deal: Date 1 (two months ago) - had a great time, she had fun and wanted to do it again (4x4ing in the dark - ATV and then out to town for some dessert followed by a 20 min conversation in her car before we parted ways). No kiss/hug or anything Last week I hosted a party and invited her. She said she was coming. Great! Then the day of the party, she asked if she could bring another guy with her (a co-worker). I played it off and said bring whoever you want. Didn't want to show jealousy. Before the party, I asked if she wanted to hop on the back of my motorcycle to go for a quick ride (she loves bikes and we've talked about riding together for awhile). She accepted and we rode for a bit. I dropped her off at her house and she gave me a hug. She came to the party but couldn't drink and had to leave early for work the next day. Her guy friend had a few to drink and she ended up driving him home. She said she had fun and it was a good party - I didn't get to close to her as I wanted... to hard with so many other people there and trying to entertain everyone. Then two nights ago I called her up and asked her if she wanted to get some food. She brought another guy-friend with her (I'm positive this guy is only a friend, and also a co-worker of hers). We had fun while dining. Had some dirty but fun conversation going, she was sitting across from me and leaning in. Rubbing my legs with hers under the table. Offered me to try some of her food using her fork... The signs were all there. We ended up leaving and she drove her friend home (who is also my friend now, cool guy). She paid for her share of the meal. Before she left, I was beside her outside and she was fumbling for her keys, saying she thought she might have left them. I felt awkward trying to kiss her infront of her friend, so I didn't.... She said she might call 'us' over tonight for a movie or something, I just said, I might answer the call and tell you I'm already sleeping. Joking around, but don't want to be too 'easy' with her. Never got a call. Then yesterday we were both off work so I texted her that if she's bored we should watch a movie together. At that point, I got called in to work but I wanted to see what she said. The reply was, "Umm maybe later , just doing laundry and being lazy right now". Then I asked her for a rain cheque because I had to work and she said sounds good. I got home that night and texted her, "movie time!" with no reply yet... I also found out that she just booked a trip down South with her friend that she brought to the party. I'm so convinced that she is into me, but I just have a terrible feeling that she's losing it for some reason and picking it up in this other guy. All of her texts are very 'hahaha-ish' Just fearing the friend-zone. I'm definitely willing to fight for this one (not physically obviously). What do you all think? Should I give up, pull her in harder, push her away a little? My friends say I'm playing hard to get with her... don't think I am?
rightfield Posted November 4, 2011 Posted November 4, 2011 I'm having trouble grasping the fact that she insists on including a guy friend in her dating. If a girl is interested in dating and is really available and wants to appear that way, she shouldn't bring along friends of either gender. It isn't a matter of jealousy, it just isn't appropriate. Leaning in and touching your leg on what really amounted to a 3rd date, with friend in tow? Weird and awkward. It's as if she brought a built-in safety buffer to maintain a distance. I'd be very hesitant to spend much more time and effort on this girl.
Leegh Posted November 4, 2011 Posted November 4, 2011 Probably the reason she brought a co-worker to the party was because most people don't like to go to a party alone, they usually like to go with someone, even if it's just a friend. You said she paid for her share of the meal. Did you offer to pay for her share of the meal? Girls really like it when guys offer to pay, it's not so much about the money, it just makes them feel respected. I would wait a week or two and then text or call her and ask her out. One of the problems with email and texting is that one cannot hear the person's voice, sometimes you can get better "vibes" from a telephone conversation, as to whether there is interest or not.
Author Plaid Posted November 4, 2011 Author Posted November 4, 2011 I forgot to mention that on the dinner date, her friend mentioned that she wants to tackle me in bed. She giggled it off, but never really denied it. I didn't say much other than smiled. Makes me wonder if she's playing hard to get? I don't want to read her falsely and give up on her if that's all it is. She also wants me to teach her how to ride a motorcycle next summer.
Author Plaid Posted November 4, 2011 Author Posted November 4, 2011 Probably the reason she brought a co-worker to the party was because most people don't like to go to a party alone, they usually like to go with someone, even if it's just a friend. You said she paid for her share of the meal. Did you offer to pay for her share of the meal? Girls really like it when guys offer to pay, it's not so much about the money, it just makes them feel respected. I would wait a week or two and then text or call her and ask her out. One of the problems with email and texting is that one cannot hear the person's voice, sometimes you can get better "vibes" from a telephone conversation, as to whether there is interest or not.\ Thanks Leegh - I agree. I paid for her meal on the first date, and she said, "Thanks" and gave a big smile. Other women are usually oh no you dont have to, sort of thing - and its annoying to me. She was a nice breath of fresh air to allow me to pay for her! I'll take your advice and not communicate with her via text or facebook, unless she initiates. Then I'll call her. I really HATE facebook and texting for that reason - waiting on replies, tone of voice, etc. Im done with it.
Leegh Posted November 4, 2011 Posted November 4, 2011 I forgot to mention that on the dinner date, her friend mentioned that she wants to tackle me in bed. She giggled it off, but never really denied it. I didn't say much other than smiled. Makes me wonder if she's playing hard to get? I don't want to read her falsely and give up on her if that's all it is. She also wants me to teach her how to ride a motorcycle next summer. She may be playing hard to get. I would definitely try again, it's better to know one way or another, but I would wait a week or so, to see if she gets in touch with you first.
Author Plaid Posted November 4, 2011 Author Posted November 4, 2011 Sounds like a plan! I also didn't mention that I told her that I want to move to another specific city (she has the same plan eventually) right away. She told me that she would hate me forever if I left her up here. So I said, 'well you better get your hate on!".. I won't be leaving anytime soon, and I think she realizes that. Anyways, I'll give it time and see where it goes
Author Plaid Posted November 5, 2011 Author Posted November 5, 2011 Any other input will be appreciated! Looking back on the times I've spent with her, it's so obvious that she's into me. But why is she going on a vacation down South with her guy friend that she brought to the party? Maybe I should have moved a little faster in terms of physical interaction. I've never really offered a hug or anything. Maybe she thinks I don't like her anymore than a friend? One more 1 on 1 date will change that.
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