GivenUp0083 Posted November 3, 2011 Posted November 3, 2011 Met a girl online, dating for 6 months, fell in love with her, she dropped me because "she wanted a fairy tale love story with love at first site and couldn't see herself marrying me". This was all after introducing each other to our families, her encouraging me to tell her I love her (and she didn't say it back at first), her telling me she loved me (probably because I stopped saying it and she wanted me to start saying it again), and I even helped her move apts up 4 stories for 7 hours to be dumped 3 days later. I don't know, she wanted to be friends, I was so badly hurt I couldn't. I thought about trying to do it. Our last contact was in August where I had asked her over text if we could meet up over coffee or something (I haven't seen her since the breakup, she broke up with me over the phone). I said I'd call her when I got back from my vacation the next week and I never followed up on it. She never contact me again either. I guess I'm pissed. I know she was seeing a guy after me, maybe still is, then she joined a "singles softball league" with her friend so I don't know if she's single or not. I guess it doesn't matter. I'm so incredibly hurt still and it's turned to bitterness. I loved her so much and now I hate her. I hate that she was so perfect for the time I was with her. I hate that I let myself fall for her. If I had one chance my entire life to go back in time, it would be to the day I met her and knock myself unconscious so that I would never meet her in the first place and save myself all the pain. I've tried everything. I smoked weed for a while to numb myself and it worked, but now I'm looking for a new job and I have to stay clean in case they piss test me. I've tried dating and meeting other women and I just feel nothing. I'm empty. I have nothing left to give. I know they're just going to eff me over and sell me bull**** anyway. I don't really want to ever go on another date again. I had what I wanted and I lost it to a cold-hearted btch. I am contemplating calling her up and just going off on her and telling her how much I hate her. I feel like I need to get it out of my system. I know I'll never get her back or anything, and I don't care if it relieves her of her guilt because a btch like her feels no guilt, she's heartless.
mike588 Posted November 3, 2011 Posted November 3, 2011 Met a girl online, dating for 6 months, fell in love with her, she dropped me because "she wanted a fairy tale love story with love at first site and couldn't see herself marrying me". This was all after introducing each other to our families, her encouraging me to tell her I love her (and she didn't say it back at first), her telling me she loved me (probably because I stopped saying it and she wanted me to start saying it again), and I even helped her move apts up 4 stories for 7 hours to be dumped 3 days later. I don't know, she wanted to be friends, I was so badly hurt I couldn't. I thought about trying to do it. Our last contact was in August where I had asked her over text if we could meet up over coffee or something (I haven't seen her since the breakup, she broke up with me over the phone). I said I'd call her when I got back from my vacation the next week and I never followed up on it. She never contact me again either. I guess I'm pissed. I know she was seeing a guy after me, maybe still is, then she joined a "singles softball league" with her friend so I don't know if she's single or not. I guess it doesn't matter. I'm so incredibly hurt still and it's turned to bitterness. I loved her so much and now I hate her. I hate that she was so perfect for the time I was with her. I hate that I let myself fall for her. If I had one chance my entire life to go back in time, it would be to the day I met her and knock myself unconscious so that I would never meet her in the first place and save myself all the pain. I've tried everything. I smoked weed for a while to numb myself and it worked, but now I'm looking for a new job and I have to stay clean in case they piss test me. I've tried dating and meeting other women and I just feel nothing. I'm empty. I have nothing left to give. I know they're just going to eff me over and sell me bull**** anyway. I don't really want to ever go on another date again. I had what I wanted and I lost it to a cold-hearted btch. I am contemplating calling her up and just going off on her and telling her how much I hate her. I feel like I need to get it out of my system. I know I'll never get her back or anything, and I don't care if it relieves her of her guilt because a btch like her feels no guilt, she's heartless. Just let her go, calling her and bitching her out won't do any good, let her remember you for being kind and the good thing/s you did for her. My ex g/f dumped me less than 2 weeks after she had surgery and I waited on her hand and foot, talk about being pissed!! It's normal to feel empty inside and not want to date right now but give it time. Just leave her alone and if she contacts you ignore her.
Mcnulty Posted November 3, 2011 Posted November 3, 2011 Don't be so hard on yourself mate. be kind to yourself...everyone is different...some people jump into a relationship and some people take longer to heal...that simple...you're healing, but you're not htere yet...be patient and kind to yourself..it's okay to feel this way. It's only been a week since I FOUND OUT MY EX IS IN A REL. IT'S GONNA TAKE ME A LOT LONGER TO DIVE IN...caps lock, sorry. I wish you strength and am sending you positive thoughts...good luck.
Author GivenUp0083 Posted November 4, 2011 Author Posted November 4, 2011 Don't be so hard on yourself mate. be kind to yourself...everyone is different...some people jump into a relationship and some people take longer to heal...that simple...you're healing, but you're not htere yet...be patient and kind to yourself..it's okay to feel this way. It's only been a week since I FOUND OUT MY EX IS IN A REL. IT'S GONNA TAKE ME A LOT LONGER TO DIVE IN...caps lock, sorry. I wish you strength and am sending you positive thoughts...good luck. Thanks for the kind words. I just wish I could go back to not caring again but it doesn't seem achievable at this point without the use of drugs. I want to be able to give someone what I gave her but I fear I'm forever ruined and bitter. I was talking to one of my best friends today and he said to me: "I wish there was some way I could show you that not all the women in the world are as heartless and evil as the ones you've dated." That really hit me hard and I don't want to be the bitter guy, but I'm just still so hurt and so angry at her.
immitable Posted November 4, 2011 Posted November 4, 2011 you put her on a pedestal during the relationship and that'S why you are angry for so long. 6 months relationship is not a long time you should have been over her by now. She wasn't worth it imo.
radiodarcy Posted November 4, 2011 Posted November 4, 2011 ahh GivenUp. i'm glad to see you're alive and well. but sorry you're back here under such circumstances i started dating a few months ago and can't seem to hold a guy's interest for longer than a few weeks. i went out on two dates with one guy -- we both seemed to have great chemistry, a lot in common. he said he wanted to get together again. about a week later he asked me out for later in the week. i said yes. not a word. followed up. he said he still wanted to get together - - how does this weekend look. i said fine. no word. needless to say - - i'm not following up again. dating can be frustrating. especially when you feel as though you've met that person who seems just right for you. but they may not feel the same way, or they're not sure or they want to see what else is out there. but - - hey what else can i do but try to focus on myself and more importantly - - my friends and family: the people in my life who do matter and who have done a lot to reinforce my faith in the human race altogether. i suggest you fight the urge to contact this girl and do the same. the release isn't going to be worth it. rally the troops (i.e. your friends and family) take some time to heal and just concentrate on living life for now. and don't worry about meeting anyone for now. it will get better. you just have to take it day by day.
Author GivenUp0083 Posted November 5, 2011 Author Posted November 5, 2011 It just doesn't seem like a day to day get better thing. It's like in phases. But in one phase I could totally be over it and not even think about her, and then another phase I'm still down about it and lonely and miss her to death. I also dated others and felt nothing and there's a couple girls I hook up with for time to time and I just feel completely empty and soulless.
Sugarkane Posted November 6, 2011 Posted November 6, 2011 GivenUp- Sounds pretty normal. If you had feelings for someone, it always hurts like hell when you get dumped and they date someone else straight away.
radiodarcy Posted November 7, 2011 Posted November 7, 2011 It just doesn't seem like a day to day get better thing. It's like in phases. But in one phase I could totally be over it and not even think about her, and then another phase I'm still down about it and lonely and miss her to death. I also dated others and felt nothing and there's a couple girls I hook up with for time to time and I just feel completely empty and soulless. Sugarkane is right. this is a normal part of the healing process. and yes -- i know- - when you are going through those two phases you don't feel as though you are making any progress. but overtime - - you will. look at me - - i'm still stinging from this latest rejection and i had only been talking to the guy for a few weeks. it's kind of lame. but i can't help the way i feel. so i just roll with it -- i survived being dumped by the guy who brought me here to LS - - i'm almost sure i'll get over this;) i just need to learn to build up tougher skin i guess,
ChelseaLS Posted November 7, 2011 Posted November 7, 2011 Thanks for the kind words. I just wish I could go back to not caring again but it doesn't seem achievable at this point without the use of drugs. I want to be able to give someone what I gave her but I fear I'm forever ruined and bitter. I was talking to one of my best friends today and he said to me: "I wish there was some way I could show you that not all the women in the world are as heartless and evil as the ones you've dated." That really hit me hard and I don't want to be the bitter guy, but I'm just still so hurt and so angry at her. Yes, I remember one of my ex's, he broke up with me and I later found out he cheated on me. I didn't deal with it well and became incredibly angry and bitter. It was gross, the bitter person I had become. This break up I have decided to deal with it in a more proactive way and learn from it (although I hate learning these lessons... I feel like I have learned enough).
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