skibum Posted November 1, 2011 Posted November 1, 2011 I havent been on this board in months and I figured after all the help I got on here Id come back and let you all know how it is 6 months out. You can find all my previous topics by clicking my name and all but in summary it was: -dated for 5 and a half years, perfect relationship - out of the blue dumped in March for a buncha BS reasons from the ex - turns out she started dating someone else less than a month after dumping me and had dumped me in order to date him - she tried calling a few times - 4 months out she texts me that she wants to talk and is sorry So I called her back about 2 months ago in order to hear her apology and see what her stance was. She apologized for hurting me (whoop dee doo, she said that when she dumped me it meant nothing). She then came up with new reasons for having broken up (I wanted to get married, moving too fast. Buncha crap I was nowhere near wanting to marry her and that was very clear). She still denied having broken up with me for the other guy. After a bit more talking it turns out she was no longer dating him and thats when I connected the dots that she was only calling me for support. She said she regretted the timing of the breakup (before the biggest exam of my life) and said she would still dump me if she had to do it again though. At that point I was like, eff it, and said bye. She kept saying she wanted to see me when I go home over XMas but I told her "I dont know" because i really dont and Im not going to play her dumb mind games. Since then we havent talked or texted at all. So I am proud of my 6 months NC with only that phone call. Shes tried emailing me random funny links once a month or so which I ignore. However I am nowhere near moved on. I still miss the girl she used to be like crazy and broke down just yesterday in tears at how much I missed her. First time I cried in months which was weird. Everyone around me thinks I am over her and fine (except for my closest confidants and family) and I would like to keep it that way. It is hard this far out and even though I have gotten with random drunk girls while out, I still detest that whole thing. If only she would admit that she left me for another guy and apologize then Id be willing to chat occasionally. But this lying, insecure girl is no one I want to be associated with. And it is hard, so hard. The most difficult thing I have done in my life to let her go but I am still trying 6 months out to forget her and I think it will still be a long road ahead. But other than that life is good!!! Most days I dont even think about her which is wonderful!
mike588 Posted November 1, 2011 Posted November 1, 2011 I havent been on this board in months and I figured after all the help I got on here Id come back and let you all know how it is 6 months out. You can find all my previous topics by clicking my name and all but in summary it was: -dated for 5 and a half years, perfect relationship - out of the blue dumped in March for a buncha BS reasons from the ex - turns out she started dating someone else less than a month after dumping me and had dumped me in order to date him - she tried calling a few times - 4 months out she texts me that she wants to talk and is sorry So I called her back about 2 months ago in order to hear her apology and see what her stance was. She apologized for hurting me (whoop dee doo, she said that when she dumped me it meant nothing). She then came up with new reasons for having broken up (I wanted to get married, moving too fast. Buncha crap I was nowhere near wanting to marry her and that was very clear). She still denied having broken up with me for the other guy. After a bit more talking it turns out she was no longer dating him and thats when I connected the dots that she was only calling me for support. She said she regretted the timing of the breakup (before the biggest exam of my life) and said she would still dump me if she had to do it again though. At that point I was like, eff it, and said bye. She kept saying she wanted to see me when I go home over XMas but I told her "I dont know" because i really dont and Im not going to play her dumb mind games. Since then we havent talked or texted at all. So I am proud of my 6 months NC with only that phone call. Shes tried emailing me random funny links once a month or so which I ignore. However I am nowhere near moved on. I still miss the girl she used to be like crazy and broke down just yesterday in tears at how much I missed her. First time I cried in months which was weird. Everyone around me thinks I am over her and fine (except for my closest confidants and family) and I would like to keep it that way. It is hard this far out and even though I have gotten with random drunk girls while out, I still detest that whole thing. If only she would admit that she left me for another guy and apologize then Id be willing to chat occasionally. But this lying, insecure girl is no one I want to be associated with. And it is hard, so hard. The most difficult thing I have done in my life to let her go but I am still trying 6 months out to forget her and I think it will still be a long road ahead. But other than that life is good!!! Most days I dont even think about her which is wonderful! I'm at 3 months after being dumped for her ex. so at least she didn't lie to me but is still a hard pill to swallow. I hope at my 6th month being dumped "anniversary" I will have fully moved on and if she contacts me I'll be able to ignore her,,, still waiting for some breadcrumbs before then though.
EgoJoe Posted November 1, 2011 Posted November 1, 2011 Well now you know to not take her calls unless she owns up to the bull****. I know the feeling of an Ex becoming incredibly pathetic before and after they "dump" you. It's not just perspective you can see it in their actions. Keep your head up brotha.
wilsonx Posted November 1, 2011 Posted November 1, 2011 (edited) If only she would admit that she left me for another guy and apologize then Id be willing to chat occasionally. But this lying, insecure girl is no one I want to be associated with. Well you are in luck, you do not have to worry about this because it will never happen. You know she broke up with for this other guy, I know she did, EgoJoe knows she did, heartofaphoenix knows she did. It doesnt matter what she says. Notice how she still blamed you? Selfish and immature. Keep up the NC and prance and dance forward Edited November 1, 2011 by wilsonx
PositiveNegative Posted November 1, 2011 Posted November 1, 2011 My ex got with a guy in two weeks. The progression went from meeting him, breaking up with me, maximum of 3 dates, then bf/gf. I'd be one ****ing idiot to think that she didn't break up with me for him. I have asked her that straight on and she simply denied it. I like how you said she missed the girl she used to be, because it's true. We all miss people as the person they were. Dear ex, Deny, deny. You're such a liar. (She would get that if she read it...)
MizHoney2U Posted November 1, 2011 Posted November 1, 2011 Good for you for ignoring her emails... I applaud your strength and although it may seem like a long time... you still have a ways to go and thanx for the update... She will continue to remember you at each relationship interval but you hang in there.
windmask Posted November 1, 2011 Posted November 1, 2011 Hey man read ur story and now read ur update. i gotta say 6 months thats a very long time and am glad u made it. to be honest its been 6 months for me as well since i went NC with my ex gf. my ex gf was my best friend she decided to leave gave stupid reasons some might actually be same as the ones u got from ur ex. I asked her as well if there was someone else she replied "NO". i feel there was someone else but maintained a no for sure. she wanted to remain friends i said how could i anyhows stuck around for another month but the topic of our relationship would get started and she started saying some terrible things to me. which upset me in the end i just listen you've hurt enough and if we loved each other for real we will be together but at the moment i gotta go. she asnwered "yea but i dont think i ever loved you" and i was upset further i said u said that u loved me 1000 freaken times. anyhows it ugly i was humiliated like i had never been, in the end i just said just delete and be happy she said fine not sure if she did but i deleted her and left. msn,facebook and everything else. its been 6 months of Strict No Contact she hasnt really called or msged either and neither have i. But i dont know why i miss her and my love for her still lives. i sound stuppiid i know. anyhows it was good reading ur story 6 months of zero contact is a lot and i know what you must have gone through because i went through hell. its odd but i think the nice people who prolly wont cheat and are honest and love the most in the relationships are the ones dumped and hurt in the end. honestly is there such thing as true love if there is well its next to impossible to have two people love on the same level i think. because even all my ex did i forgive her and love her. yet shes full of so much pride wont ever admit she did wrong and will never apologize. anyhows am writing a lot. sorry glad to have read ur story though. good luck
Mcnulty Posted November 1, 2011 Posted November 1, 2011 I feel for you Windmask, must ahve been so hurtful to hear her say those things. "honestly is there such thing as true love if there is well its next to impossible to have two people love on the same level i think." This resonates on so many levels, you're right, how often do you get 2 people on the same level of love after a honeymoon period, not many I bet...cynical me, still raw as hell i am. I wish you strength and luck for your future, you and I deserve better. Pride...you keep yours and hold your head high...life will get brighter, I'm sure.
Author skibum Posted November 2, 2011 Author Posted November 2, 2011 Im sorry to hear all that you went through windmask, it sure is a tough road but Im right there with ya. "honestly is there such thing as true love if there is well its next to impossible to have two people love on the same level i think" - I totally agree, and it makes it so hard when you date a girl for years and actually do love on the same level until s*** happens out of the blue. Its us nice guys that always get the shaft. I am a damn forgiving guy but its all for myself in the end. Life is much easier, I barely thought about her until recently and just the past few days its kinda all hit back hard. I think its because Im not as busy on my new rotation. And the XMas season was always fireplace and dates and skiing season with her. Up until a few days back I had lived a totally normal life and although I am not ready to date again I hadnt cried in months. It does get easier and especially with this board. I wanted to come here and thank everyone who helped me so so so very much. Its made the process a helluva lot easier and although I have a ways to go Ill be here and appreciating kind hearted random strangers
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