New boyfriend did not give my son a gift for his birthday

[Miss M]

Should I be upset about this? I wasn't at first, and didn't really think it was a big deal, but then I started thinking wait a minute, did he not think my son was worth enough to give him a little gift for his birthday? He got me a gift for my birthday and actually my son got him a sports water bottle for his birthday.

 

I asked himi about it and he said, "i forgot to ask you what to get him" and then said "i'll get him something" and I just said it's not the material item i'm interested in my son getting, it's the point. I could tell he felt a little upset about it, but It's been 10 days and still nothing.

 

I'm still kinda upset about this,what do you guys think?

 

We've been together for 8 months and my son is 12

[Stung]

How does your son feel about it?

 

I would take a moment to reflect on what kind of a gift-giver the boyfriend is--some people get really flustered around giving gifts, and others attach very little significance to gifts and holidays.

 

However, because I am a symbolic thinker and I do attach big significance to gifts and special days/events, I would personally be upset, and I would be worried that my child would take it as a slight. A part of me would also wonder if it was telling of a deeper rift in my relationship--like maybe it was not as meaningful as I wanted it to be, if my boyfriend didn't even consider it important to acknowledge my son's birthday.

 

Of course, I am also a mom. Does your bf have any children? Affinity for children? Twelve is an age when gift-giving starts to get harder for kids, unless you know them well--little kids are so much easier to please. If your bf is one of the types who is easily flustered around gift-giving issues, he might have felt under a lot of pressure to find the perfect gift and ended up self-sabotaging and bombing because of it. That, of course, could open up a whole other can of worms as you might justifiably wonder how widespread that particular quirk of his might be.