perfectlyflawed459 Posted October 31, 2011 Posted October 31, 2011 I am having a really bad today....like I just got done crying because I miss him sooooo freaking much. It usually helps to kind of talk about it, but I don't want to bother any of my friends with it so I just figured I would write a note to him here to kind of get this off my chest Dear C. Wow I can't believe it has only been a month since I have seen or spoken to you, it feels like it has been years. Do you ever think about me, wonder about me, miss me? When I look up at the starry sky and full moon, are you looking at them too? Because not a day goes by where you don't enter my head, where I don't wonder about you, and not a second goes by where I don't miss you and all the wonderful moments we have shared together. How is your life? Are you happy? Does she really make you happy? Have you noticed I am gone? Am I nothing but a memory to you? Or in between those smiles do you ache just like I do. There is so much I wish I could say and do with you. I wish I could hug you, smile with you, laugh with you, BE with you. I wish I could be your kowalawala bear again, listen to classical music like we use to, go on our Sunday walks with your goofy dogs Sarge and Lucy. I wish I could cheer you on loudly instead of doing it from the shadows. I wish I could express to you how proud I am of you, despite our downfalls. I wish I could find the words to tell you that truly reflect how much you really mean to me and how much I love you. I wish you would realize that she, or any other girl, will NEVER be able to give you the same love I have for you, and that you would finally appreciate the sacrifices I have made for you. If only you knew how hard it was to say goodbye to you on that night a month ago. Doing the right thing has never hurt so much, and I know the right thing to do is to let you go, even if it hurts me. I will always love you, even through the bad, forever and always. If you ever decide to find your way home, my heart will still be open. Ugh here come the waterworks...But I do feel better. I am so grateful for this website, it truly has helped me a lot
fenderjames Posted October 31, 2011 Posted October 31, 2011 Nice letter PF . I too am so glad for this site . I don't know if you read the " coping " threads , but I've found them to be really helpful . Just wanted to let you know . Stay strong K !
Author perfectlyflawed459 Posted October 31, 2011 Author Posted October 31, 2011 Nice letter PF . I too am so glad for this site . I don't know if you read the " coping " threads , but I've found them to be really helpful . Just wanted to let you know . Stay strong K ! I will definitely check them out. Thank you so much. I am trying, but some days it hits hard. Man I just wish I could tell him all this, but I know separation is best for us
mike588 Posted October 31, 2011 Posted October 31, 2011 I am having a really bad today....like I just got done crying because I miss him sooooo freaking much. It usually helps to kind of talk about it, but I don't want to bother any of my friends with it so I just figured I would write a note to him here to kind of get this off my chest Dear C. Wow I can't believe it has only been a month since I have seen or spoken to you, it feels like it has been years. Do you ever think about me, wonder about me, miss me? When I look up at the starry sky and full moon, are you looking at them too? Because not a day goes by where you don't enter my head, where I don't wonder about you, and not a second goes by where I don't miss you and all the wonderful moments we have shared together. How is your life? Are you happy? Does she really make you happy? Have you noticed I am gone? Am I nothing but a memory to you? Or in between those smiles do you ache just like I do. There is so much I wish I could say and do with you. I wish I could hug you, smile with you, laugh with you, BE with you. I wish I could be your kowalawala bear again, listen to classical music like we use to, go on our Sunday walks with your goofy dogs Sarge and Lucy. I wish I could cheer you on loudly instead of doing it from the shadows. I wish I could express to you how proud I am of you, despite our downfalls. I wish I could find the words to tell you that truly reflect how much you really mean to me and how much I love you. I wish you would realize that she, or any other girl, will NEVER be able to give you the same love I have for you, and that you would finally appreciate the sacrifices I have made for you. If only you knew how hard it was to say goodbye to you on that night a month ago. Doing the right thing has never hurt so much, and I know the right thing to do is to let you go, even if it hurts me. I will always love you, even through the bad, forever and always. If you ever decide to find your way home, my heart will still be open. Ugh here come the waterworks...But I do feel better. I am so grateful for this website, it truly has helped me a lot Did you send it?? I hope you didn't. My waterworks almost started flowing too.I have felt the same way and wanted sooooo bad to send my ex. something like that but am so glad now I haven't because she's happy and got what she wanted. It helps so much to express your feelings by writing them but DON'T send it to your ex.
Author perfectlyflawed459 Posted October 31, 2011 Author Posted October 31, 2011 Did you send it?? I hope you didn't. My waterworks almost started flowing too.I have felt the same way and wanted sooooo bad to send my ex. something like that but am so glad now I haven't because she's happy and got what she wanted. It helps so much to express your feelings by writing them but DON'T send it to your ex. Haha don't worry, I didn't send it. I know right now isn't the right time for us and it won't be for a very long time. I know they say if you love someone, let them go and such. But this "waiting" or whatever you wanna call it is soooo tough
mike588 Posted October 31, 2011 Posted October 31, 2011 Haha don't worry, I didn't send it. I know right now isn't the right time for us and it won't be for a very long time. I know they say if you love someone, let them go and such. But this "waiting" or whatever you wanna call it is soooo tough I hope you don't put your life on hold for him? Go ahead and grief, take your time like I am and let's see what happens. So much pain behind these smiling eyes
Author perfectlyflawed459 Posted October 31, 2011 Author Posted October 31, 2011 I hope you don't put your life on hold for him? Go ahead and grief, take your time like I am and let's see what happens. So much pain behind these smiling eyes No I haven't! I have been moving forward and I have felt pretty happy lately with life. A lot of good things have happened and I appreciate everything going right and such. There are just those days where I miss him a lot. I am taking my time and we will see what the future brings. I know life can work in funny ways, but I am trying not to get my hopes up. Yea somedays it is tough to genuinely smile
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